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...and I don't know why! Something is going on in my head and my heart that I just cannot figure out. From all outward appearances I'm fine...but inside...there is nothing...a void.
I haven't really had anything happening that would make me feel this way...actually I should be feeling really good right now. Is it the unanswered questions...is it that I'm afraid that if something is going right I'm setting myself up for a fall? What is it...?
I sat down yesterday to write a blog and yet no words came out...I just stared at the keyboard and was too embarressed to write...I just don't know what is going on at this point.
Have any of you felt this way...felt like life was going good and then...nothing!
I do hope all of you had a good day...I actually did...but right now...there is nothing! I actually feel stripped of who and what I am...for no reason at all.
7/20/2006 9:53 pm
Myst... the "blank slate state".it is not a void but more a station, a position, a stageing ground, where potential is in question,possibily based on a past, and the natural progression becomes a white out of inner fear of the "fall". |
Stop you free fall, all is fine.. you are, and will always be who you are, which is a beautiful woman,sensual, staid, driven, conscientious, caring, loving,intellegent,warm hearted, and most mystifying in your very own being, spirit and soul..that you share with all, and for that I
Now carry on, knock the "block"... and remember even writers have days where the pen won't hit the tablet, and they still make millions,...bastards...lol
See ya round the block ..
7/21/2006 5:38 am
Story of my life right now. Not even sure what I'm struggling with either. Anger? Not really. Hurt? Not really. Disappointment. Maybe a little. Nothing major. I keep a journal too, but for the past week-nothing. Sleep takes a long time and is fleeting the past few days. |
is it that I'm afraid that if something is going right I'm setting myself up for a fall?
I wonder the same. Maybe I need to stop wondering. Still...