about healing  

milady_de_winter 43F
938 posts
8/5/2006 10:36 pm

Last Read:
8/6/2006 5:17 pm

about healing


well i had a great lunch with P yesterday.... i really like him..in some ways he is like a small boy...he is afraid to have a relationship again..he has his cructhes...but i LIKE him !!!!!!!!!!!!

just to let you know- he has a killer body, he is cute ( almost similar to someone i once loved - ahh..thats another story...) and he is a nice man....if i am given the chance ( this is a secret)..i will be his friend and confidante for the rest of his lnatural life- i have no expectations..and am happy being platonic friends with him....

i am thinking of him this afternoon...why? ..i wonder myself too....part of me wants to take its like real slow..."don't get hurt again Miss Divine"....don't feel hurt again....

But it was something we discussed over dinner last nite and yesterday at lunch..i have healed..i remain the nice person...no matter what i have experienced..i don't see myself as a victim...

a girl friend of mine says..."take em' on a shopping trip- so you don't feel used..."....upon reflection I realise its not about material things is it??? Yeah if he is generous and he buys willingly out of his own volition then its another matter....

but if its just casual sex and both people wanted it...then you cannot demand for money or material items...

i know of some women who drag a man shopping or demand for things or run up expensive bills at dinner...for what????

i think its better to forgive, heal and move on..no matter what had happened in the past...be the nicer person...

that way one will not methamorphisize into a mean butch man hater or a bitter material girl...

after all if you look at it ...its not material compensation that heals..it may keep you satisfied for a while...but its not fullfiiling at the end of the day..

that is of course if your main source of income is based on that...i mean no offence to sex workers...but if your income is based on fucking men for money - then charge...

Ok..so now...i am still thinking of him,....ahhh Mr P ....dam di dum da....

I think from now on i shall take it easy....like a good friend of mine once said..."you are different..you are better than that..."

Yes true- i will not take, i will not hurt, i will not run up bills....just because i have been hurt in the past- it does not justify hurting another...

The buck stops with me...

Ciao

IviesBidesJuste 55M
3658 posts
8/6/2006 3:29 am

Good thoughts my dear.

Especially about the materialistic aspects of it.

Some women do think that they should drag the guy off shopping so he can spend on things for her. But frankly, this is a mistake, and only the beginning of how he'll eventually look at you in a different way. A way that I don't think you want to be seen as.

He'll eventually think your just another lady wanting compensation, in one way or another for just being with him. Men grow tired of that quickly and will soon treat you with far less respect than you deserve.

To them it's like, Why have someone that would act like a sex worker, when you can be with someone that treats you with greater respect. Someone that genuinely enjoys their time with you rather than being expected to be just another wallet.

With that in mind, the rewards are far more greater.


gotnonameone 48M
25 posts
8/6/2006 10:04 am

agreed!

hv fun and good luck!


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