Penile Implant Recalled  

micahbiguns 50M
1308 posts
5/21/2006 9:20 pm

Last Read:
5/23/2006 4:05 pm

Penile Implant Recalled

Rochester, MN

A Spokes person for the Mayo Clinic held a press conference this evening and sadly announced that TTigerAtty penile implant which had been surgicaly installed 11 days ago has been recalled. He then turned the stage over to DR. Richard Dick' Head.

Dr. Richard 'Dick' Head, M.D., who headed up the surgery team, stated that TTigerAtty, the first recipient of this implant needs to return immediately to the clinic for reevaluation and surgical removal. Dr Head went on to state that the clinic was against the use of this particular implant as it was to new and untested. Mr Atty insisted that he had to have the best for his movies. We also strongly advised Mr. Atty to stay here for at least 2 more weeks but he signed himself out against our advise. Dr.Head then opened the floor for questions.

Reporter What type of trouble can TTigerAtty expect to have with his new equipment?

Dr. Head The problems that have occurred are do to a bad resistor in the Implant that when it blows allows unrestricted current to flow from the Bionic power pack directly to the testicles. The resulting surge is strong enough to cook the flesh of the testicles, there by rendering the recipient of said current permanently impotent. The resistor is not designed to withstand any long and rigorous activities. I cannot stress how important it is that Mr. Atty get back here post haste. He must avoid any strong magnetic fields or x-ray devices for these will surely lead to a blown resistor and fried testicle and to Mr. Atty being an eunuch.

Reporter Do you see any legal problems arising from this situation with the implant? In short do you think Mr. Atty will sue you and the clinic?

Gentlemen I am a doctor not a Lawyer we will refer all claims to our lawyers of record Dewey, Cheetum, and Howe. That is all and good night

TTigerAtty 62M

5/22/2006 4:08 am

Now, wait just a minute here! I have a one year warranty with this thing and have been given many assurances. Kat's got me in the biggest sex scene of my movie career. I'm in Paris filming, and I can't fly back on short notice! The manufacturer, Performance Penile Implants, gave me all kinds of assurances. This just cannot be happening! There must be some kind of mistake!

micahbiguns 50M

5/22/2006 6:15 am

katsback Yes please do this sounds most urgent!

SensuallyKatey Hmm sounds like a conspiracy to me

TTigerAtty Well lets see big sex scene or being a cooked testicle eunuch hm mm decisions decisions.. Did you not hear Performance Penile Implants has filed for bankruptcy!!

micahbiguns 50M

5/22/2006 6:18 am

BTW the newspaper article states no "strong magnetic fields or X-rays" how will you get back then? You cannot fly because you will surely face both of these problems.

micahbiguns 50M

5/22/2006 8:17 am

katsback Haven't ya heard that the company that made Tige's Implant filed bankruptcy

m1903a3 59M

5/22/2006 3:13 pm

I'm an electronics engineer, but there some things even I refuse to work on.
Sorry, Tige.

micahbiguns 50M

5/22/2006 3:36 pm

katsback No I am not kidding Poor Tige BTW didn't the contract you signed with him have a performance clause? I believe I remember something about failure to perform makes the contract null and void and forfeiture of all monies paid??

micahbiguns 50M

5/22/2006 5:50 pm

m1903a3 don't blame ya a bit there


5/23/2006 9:48 am


just a squirrel trying to get a nut

micahbiguns 50M

5/23/2006 4:05 pm

katsback Ok his and hers!! When do I get em


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