Help I need advice badly  

micahbiguns 50M
1308 posts
1/5/2006 11:41 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Help I need advice badly

I have been away for a while spending time in real world with family and friends. On new years eve I attended a party at a friends house (we were best friends in high school)as a junior in high school I fell head over heels in love (my first and still strongest) with his younger sister. I never had the courage to ask her out that year and we moved to another state for my senior year. I thought of Carol a lot and often for the next few years. All women I dated for the next couple of years were compared to her. Then I made the worst mistake of my life, I got married to the wrong person and stayed in that hell for 18 years. Having told you all that here is my problem, at the party just before midnight I spotted her and all those feelings from years ago came rushing back I asked my bud what his sister was doing these days and finally found out she had never married. I talked to her some that night and have seen her everyday since we have lots of fun together we laugh and talk for hours on end. I have been single for almost 2 years now and have not had a sexual relation in over 4. I have really had problems trusting women after my ex wife. I am not willing to hop from bed to bed with all the STDs going around, Carol does not believe in sex before marriage, I swore that I would not get married again after my divorce. I am starting to waiver on that commitment, I just don't know..... on one hand I have loved this lady my whole adult life and know her well.. on the other I am afraid to open myself for the kind of hurt that could be there, Am I just thinking with my pecker, or could this be the start of the best of my life we seem like a natural fit together. Oh you should know she had a crush on me way back then so we are able to explore our feelings freely and we share a lot in common I have to go back to work Monday so I have to decide pretty soon where I want this to go. Any thoughts or comments would be appreciated .

Thanks a bunch

Efilnikufecin69 47M

1/6/2006 2:12 am

I can understand perfectly your weariness to "jump" right in, but on the other hand, if the feelings for her still exist so strongly today, and the feelings radiating from her are as strong, then go for it. I am not saying get married right away, but try out the relationship for a while to make sure it isn't just infatuation and false hopes that are there. Nevertheless, whatever you decide, I wish you luck, and should you take the path of marriage, I wish you a life long of happiness together.

rm_jackie40503 69T
1323 posts
1/6/2006 2:35 am

First theres no hurry so don't get in a rush to make a decision at this point.

Second, and most important, discuss this with her in a completely honest and open manner, you just might be surprised at her reaction. A true relationship can’t exist without both parties being honest and open with each other. And you will never really feel comfortable with another until you can get these feelings out in the open where they can be confronted.


frangipanigal 44F
10406 posts
1/6/2006 2:53 am

First love always is the strongest..go for it! At least you will not die wondering...

Frangi x

iluv2fk3 48F

1/6/2006 6:29 am

Trust/ Respect /Understanding- the 3 pillars to a good relationship....
For me, trust is still an issue I have to work on, on a daily basis. I've finally realised that I dont trust myself so how the hell will I trust another. And the fear of pain, paralyses me. But what is life if we dont take risks. I know I dont want to die... WONDERING....
Go for it, what do you have to lose? Seems like you've been given a second chance...TAKE IT...

micahbiguns 50M

1/6/2006 1:40 pm

Efilnikufecin69 Thank you

jackie40503 Thank You

frangipanigal To true

caressmewell Breathing now lol

iluv2fk3 Well nothing to lose but my sanity and seeing as that has been gone for a few years what the heck

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