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In the hospital the relatives gathered in the waiting room, where their family member lay gravely ill. Finally, the doctor came in
looking tired and somber. "I'm afraid I'm the bearer of bad news," he said as he surveyed the worried faces.
"The only hope left for your loved one at this time is a brain transplant.
It's an experimental procedure, very risky but it is the only hope.
Insurance will cover the procedure, but you will have to pay for the brain yourselves.."
The family members sat silent as they absorbed the news. After a great length of time, someone asked , "Well, how much does a brain cost?"
The doctor quickly responded, "$5,000 for a male brain, and $200 for a female brain"
The moment turned awkward. Men in the room tried not to smile, avoiding eye contact with the women, but some actually smirked.
A man unable to control his curiosity, blurted out the question everyone wanted to ask,
"Why is the male brain so much more ?"
The doctor smiled at the childish innocence and explained to the entire group, "It's just standard pricing procedure. We have to mark
down the price of the female brains, because they've actually been used."
An old man and woman owned a farm. The old man died and the woman couldn't handle the farm by herself so she was going to hire someone to help her. The only job applicants were the town drunk and a new guy in town, who was gay. So she chose the gay guy; they worked together for a week or so and got the farm back together. The old woman
was pleased with the work and worn out, so she
decided to give herself and her hired hand the night off.
Both went out to dinner -- she with her friends and he with his. But when the old woman got home, he wasn't there.
When he finally came in, she told him, “I'm your boss so you have to do what I tell you.”
The gay guy said, “Okay.”
So she said, “Take my shoes off,” so he did.
She said, “Take my stockings off,” so he did.
Then she said, “Take my dress off,” and he did.
She said, “Take my bra off,” so he did.
Then she said, “Take my panties off,” so he did.
Finally, she said, “You leave this house wearing my clothes one more time and you're fired.”
6/23/2006 6:02 am
7/9/2006 1:42 pm
LMAO!!! Both are funny, but the second one made me laugh so hard I near cracked a rib!!! Too funny!!! ))|