A Conundrum Solved  

lonelyinny5 43M/41F
131 posts
8/19/2006 10:46 am
A Conundrum Solved

In response to the conundrum I posited a few posts ago, I am writing this bit of wisdom I have come up with after some time and thought and with the help of a good friend I met on this site - with whom I also have great sex

I used to think the concept of NSA was a truly elusive conundrum. Since the mind is the most powerful sexual organ we have, physical attraction is not only based in appearances but also in a potential lovers personality, their ideas and behaviours makes attraction anything but shallow. How then, can we limit ourself to brief moments of heated physical bliss with someone we like as a person too? Isn't it natural to want to be around this person all the time since our attraction and that which makes sex explosive is rooted in something much deeper?

The answer I realised lies within the simple yet timeless concept.....HONESTY.

I realised how important it is to be honest with yourself about what it is you are truly looking for and to hold steadfast to that. What do you want from a potential relationship? Is it Friendship with great sex, a Relationship or just Hot sex without involvement?

I don't think it possible to feel good about having great sex with someone when you really want more than you say. If you want him/her as your friend as well as lover, then say so. This way you can potentially have them as a part of your life as any other friend and the added benefits of hot sex. If you want a relationship be honest with yourself and with your partner. This is the ONLY way you can have them without feeling cheated. It is only because of trickery and deceit to both yourself and to your partner that love or sex will leave you feeling so badly.

With that, keep in mind, that "even sunlight burns when you get too much" and how important it is to be able to "plant your own garden instead of waiting for someone else to bring you flowers".

Like Shakespeare so wisely pointed out, "above all else, to thine ownself be true". Be honest first with yourself and then with those around you. This is the solution to this seemingly elusive enigma and the key to real satisfaction in any type of relationship you ultimately pursue.

Searching for my fairytale: Passion & intimacy tied together in a warm, wonderful friendship

KiowaScoutLDR 51M

8/31/2006 10:15 am

Let's plant a garden together...

John_doe13833 at ya hoo


story2k 47M

9/20/2006 1:39 am

I really liked this post because you clearly stated what a lot of people here deal with when trying to meet people. People are not honest about what they want so they are continually frustrated in their search.

d17flower 40F

10/13/2006 3:21 am

It is refreshing to hear someone else say that the mind it the most powerful sexual organ. It is the center of our fantasies and desires. Without the symphony there is no inspiration and sex gets dull really quick.

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