Family get-togethers. Whee.....  

lonelyforsaken 35M
8 posts
7/18/2006 5:03 pm
Family get-togethers. Whee.....

Man, I hate reunions.

Starting this weekend, I'll be up in Seattle, visiting various relatives in the area. It's not a full-blown family reunion; that was the original intent, but the logistics involved washed that idea out to sea pretty quick. Instead, we'll simply be celebrating my grandmother's birthday, and doing to whole "haven't seen you in x years" routine. Frankly, I'm ambivlent about the whole thing. It will be nice to touch base with the relatives, but...

Ah, I'll be blunt. I was an obnoxious little shit the last time I visited them, and I'm only slightly better now. And I suspect that's why I haven't been able to sleep for the past week.

How do you apologize for existing?

Well, I'l muddle through somehow. If I could arrange to have my jaw wired shut between now and Friday, I might be able to buy myself some time, but that would mean no restaurants. This is a Bad Thing.

What I'm really dreading will be the inevitable "Why don't you have a girlfriend yet?" interrogation. (At least they'll wait until the second day or so before breaking out the thumbscrews. My family may have a mean streak, but we do try and temper it sometimes.)

What do I tell them then? I'll probably go for the "smokescreen" approach ("Oh, I just haven't found The One yet."), but they'll keep needling at me, regardless. Besides, the truth would be too unpalatable for them: "Because I have the effective experience of an eleven-year-old, so attracting someone is entirely beyond my abilities. Plus, a quarter-century of isolation and loneliness has pushed me to the brink of psychotic, so women know better than to even look my way."

Cripes, I can feel them glaring daggers into me already.

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