What to do....  

lissi888888 52F
1330 posts
8/24/2006 10:59 am

Last Read:
9/27/2006 9:09 pm

What to do....

I don't do staying at home well. I just figured this out and I've only been layed off for a day now.

This still feels like a new beginning but I'm finding things out anew. Things I'd forgotten previously.

I'd forgotten just how much I hated staying home before I was allowed to work up here in Canada. I'd forgotten the sense of purpose I always felt going to work. Sure I may have been tired some days but I was out there, doing something. I'd forgotten how my wee one can get on my last nerve when I am stressed (yes, feeling stressed right this very minute).

I filled out my forms for unemployment today and my paycheck and reference letters should arrive any time. These are positives. I know they are but they leave me empty. I know the grieving process. I get it completely. I'm there. I've had a significant loss and need to come to terms with it (no matter how much I hated that job...it was a job and it paid the bills which is hugely important to me and always has been).

I think I just need a hug. But honey is dealing with his own stuff today and for the next couple days so I won't get to see him...even for a hug. Don't misinterpret me...what he's doing is of the utmost importance and I don't begrudge him it at all. I just miss him and need a hug, a kiss, and a couple hours of cuddle. I bet right about now he could use them just as much as me if not moreso.

It always amazes me how a cuddle can change your perspective 180 degrees to the positive. I mean really, I can be totally negative...feeling totally doomed and dragged out even. I cuddle for a while and feel rejuvinated. Things aren't hugely complicated anymore. They are in perspective and I can see what I need to do. I am happy and everything is well. Hugs are amazing things.

*sobbing softly*...not a good day...not a good day at all. I know it will get better very quickly but guessing I just need to tough it out and get through this phase. Now if I could just get my emotions under control and stop this freakin' crying I'd be much better.

SirMounts 102M

8/24/2006 12:02 pm

Well, you know best about yourself, but if you'd like another point of view, don't sit around and mope. When you do that, you focus only on your problems, and so your attitude only gets worse. Go out and do something, anything. And if you make a point to be with friends, you're likey to get a lot of hugs, too.
*long distance, long lasting hug*

Dalmy67 48F

8/24/2006 8:51 pm

Hang in there girl!!! It is a good time to get a job that you love. Yeah, I do hear that they exist! LOL!!! Even though I don't love my job, I like it most of the time and it pays the bills.

Take care!

Become a member to create a blog