Thoughts.........hmmmmm  

kissnlik 40F
295 posts
6/4/2006 6:36 pm
Thoughts.........hmmmmm


Well, I realized this weekend that I'm to chickenshit to get emotionally involved with another human being right now. I suppose I could pull off the notion of being in love with someone other than my husband, but I'm not willing to go through the motions of attaining that kind of love. Is it laziness? Possibly, or maybe it's just those recurring thoughts of leaving my husband for another man that bother me. Would I do it? I really don't know. If I did, the next guy would have to be a real success! I mean he would have to have a good job, own a car, good credit, live in a nice area, be completley honest, caring, gentle with me, laid back and totally willing to jump off the top of a building with me should I have the urge ( parachutes included...lol). I'm not a complete idiot! I've given out too much of myself to the wrong people. Most of the time I didn't realize it was the wrong person until it was too late. I'm the type of person who loves with everything I have. I give all I can and do all I can for the person I love. If you betray my trust ( I don't mean an affair, I'd actually join in if she were cute), hurt me or use me, then there's no going back with me. Once I decide it's over, then that's THAT! You will never hear from me or see me again. I just don't know if I'm willing to do all the work it takes to be in a new relationship right now. Perhaps I am a chicken for not wanting to take that risk right now. Who knows?

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