jesternz001 42M
376 posts
12/8/2005 7:10 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm


I just had a mini ephipany just a few minutes ago. I wasn't doing any deep soul searching or looking to hard at myself and like a flash of light it hit me. I LIKE me. I like who I am and who I was and I have high hopes about who I am going to be. Does that mean that I am not going to continue on my never-ending quest for self perfection? No. I fully believe that the human state can achieve a limited perfection.

I guess I should explain limited perfection. No one can be fully perfect. Its impossible. I guess I should refer to it more of a equilibrium. Humans can become better than what they are. We are born into this world and through our life we we get thrown in a morass of shit. We can either wallow in it ( like some people chose to) or we can rise above it. I personally chose to rise above as much as I can.

Anyways, back to the whole thing about liking me. The person who I am right now is in as good a state as he can be (all things considered). I am dependant (living with my best friend in the world) without being needy. I have a background of pride (prior service NCO, world traveller, former intellectual snob, culturally curious) without being concieted. Strong (for all that I have overcome) but understanding (for all that everyone else is going through)

This is what I mean by limited perfection. I still have plenty of room to grow, but I have achieved a level of happiness with who I am and where I am from and where I am going to go.
(Therefore by the Grace of thee go The Shadows of my past (Amy, Teresa, the Air Force, ACU, ect) are no longer looming over me. They are but shadows that have no more substance than I give them. I am a light, if only for myself. And in the end... isnt that all we can honestly hope for? To be someone who can stand tall in the face of the crap this world gives us and help others to stand on their own? I believe that I am that kind of person, and as long as I believe it... its true.

Pax Vobiscum all

Via Con Carne!

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