i don't know why I do things at the last second.. including last second flash "dates"  

ifiknewbetter 46F
36 posts
12/23/2005 9:17 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

i don't know why I do things at the last second.. including last second flash "dates"

I had a nutty day yesterday... everything I planned went haywire... .. the last three nights I have been in early... but got no sleep.. and it was not cuz' of the company... I am feeling put off... I need to go out and have fun.... I had "an interesting" meeting last night after all the shopping I did... I still have a few more things to do... and boy do I really hate wrapping... grrrrrr..... *rolls eyes* I am not in the mood for Christmas at all... I never used to be like this.. it started with me 5 years ago... I used to be into the holidays... what the fuck happened???

Anyway...

E was nice.. but I am not sure if we are a match.. he says he was "nervous" and I was so tired from not enough rest, stress, & shopping... I was just plain
"tired" looked like hell... AND FELT LIKE HELL...

but it just felt odd... It was hard to hear him at the middle east and the conversation did not flow as I would have like at the start.... I thought we were going to go out... and I didn't like the idea of just staying home.. I already have my boyfriends I do that with.. All I want to do is have a little fun.. I wanted to go out.. enjoy... if there was drinking or not.... you know pat myself on the back for doing all that I needed to do more or less in one day.... (for Christmas& the kids)

I am tired of these so called dates that it is dinner.... than home.... sooo not cool... WTF is up with that???

I am not going to allow that any longer.... forget it boys...

most of the conversatiion didn't click for me.. until the end of the night... I don't know... maybe it was...
WHAT
we talked about that put a damper on things for me... something just didn't fit... just didn't feel right.. It could have been the
JOEL FACTOR...

I do not know.... maybe if we go out again??? but I am booked solid Through the NewYear .... and than Joel will come to stay with me for awhile....

anyway E left before 11:00 and the kids came by 8:00am.. well on the up side.. I got most of my shopping done... and some MUST NEEDED rest in.. and it was nice to wake up to FAMILY...

~~~lucky charms and coffee~~~


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