I was asked to post a fantasy and i was amazed that there is not a breast or a penis involved......  

hotbloke59 37M
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1/7/2006 9:46 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

I was asked to post a fantasy and i was amazed that there is not a breast or a penis involved......

Last week i was down at my local shops before they closed getting some milk and bread and whatever and I'm feeling a bit horny, i'd split from my ex a few weeks prior to this due to mainly her dysfunction but anyway... i can't go on the net as it's in the living room and i live with friends so that's out, i'd like to go out to my fave bar to see what's about, having worked there a few times in the past i know everyone in there and always did well with the ladies and it wasn't, and isn't the problem to find a hot sexy female to join me in there at all. But she goes there, a lot. What do you do after you split from someone? you move on, right. i couldn't as i didn't want any feelings getting hurt. I so I’d decided on a good old dirty magazine as the naughty photo's of my ex in my phone had worn out of their magic power over me. I was in the shop and getting a tad flustered by now as i didn't want, you know, an amazingly attractive woman to come in and see me reaching for the top shelf, normally i wouldnt care but at this point my mojo was already feeling shaky and i needed a re-charge of sorts...

So i'm standing there in front of the assorted tabloids and womens weeklys, I feel like you do in that dream where you go to work without your trousers(or skirt) on, you know, That dream… Anyway, I’m holding a music mag and feeling like an undercover detecive, every now and then looking upwards to see which one takes my fancy....Dammit they all look the same....ok, think quick, act bold, think quick, act bold....Right, what do i look for in a woman....bugger, no time to think....shit...ok, no airbrushed braindead girls, nope, i want it real....ok....spotted a seductive glance......yes, she's hot! jackpot. Whatever mag it actually was i was content that if i didn't take the one looking at me now, i would get busted. So, I'm reaching up...further...just a little bit....GOT IT! look to the door and it's all clear, great(puts under the decoy music weekly and makes his final approach to the counter...(i'd love to say that some old person or whoever came in but i think i'll be here writing this forever!!)

Great, mission successful, time to get this nightmare over...(get's on bike, wipes brow and proceeds down the pavement...)

Ok so i'm going round the corner and proceed onwards to my house and i spot someone on the pavement coming towards me, not far now, I’m cool, I’m cool….so i move over to the left and they move over to their left. i have to navigave past a lamppost on this side to ensure no-one get's hit so i'm being careful and, oh Damn, the woman that I’m trying not to hit is really hot(i momentarily lapse concentration as my real brain in my trousers suddenly kicks into life)........handle bar hit said lamppost……bang, crash,*me falling on my arse in front of a(goes into a mesmerised dream state..)reeeeaaaallly hot woman...* I then sit up, try and dust myself off and get a gague of the situation. ok, nothing broken, no bleeding, hot woman is really close, bent over checking i'm ok. wow, she just stroked my brow, right, evasive action needed, shoot hot, bemused sexy smile at her, wink, say thank's and get on your bike man...ok, im up, ooh, hell i'm dizzy, sit back down again, hold head and make sure i've not....dropped....anything....FUCK! laying on the little tuft of grass infront of someones front fence was my fucking porn mag, oh poor, desperate me! lol. I gathered that in the confusion she hadn't noticed that there was a closed(thank you lord!) pornographic magazine just laying beside us, she's still looking into my eye's asking me how many fingers she's holding up, i had to play this cool.....

Now, this woman was perfect, a bit older than me, I'd say she was about 32-35, he hair was a stunningly reddish kind of brunette that was feathered and came just down past her petite shoulders, with lovely green eyes she looked at me, looking slim but full, wearing a nice coat, t-shirt, jeans and boots(of course i noticed they were heeled, i wasnt really with it but i do remember looking down confused, and there being a little internal *ping* when my gazed drifeted down and saw her boots, I noticed them because i love a woman in heels, who doesnt, but that's another story!), she was about 5'6"-5'7" I'd say and i could tell she had a fantastic arse as her jeans were reasonably tight and that's when i saw the bloody wedding ring.....Darn! Of course she's married, i thought to myself, she's jaw-droppingly beautiful! (this all happened a lot quicker than it reads and of course my main concern now, and i still had to deal with the porn!)

I had to do something to get out of this predicament so i decided to get up again, grab the mag's and the ripped plastic bag and then get myself home and safe from embarressment....Right, now's the time....Hand on ground and hand on gorgeous womans shoulder and.....Up....Not dizzy, good.....

I look over her shoulder, just out of both our fields of vision and to the right of the feline in front of me, and I stare....hold gaze....hold....gaze....and say: 'Oh', look bemused and say it man.....'is that my wallet over there'?i say,(point away from the porn mag...point away from the porn....)

She looks to her right, squinting and slowly turning and walking towards the (conveniently well spotted)discarded, darkly couloured, cigarrette pack about ten feet away down the pavement...

Hook, Line and Sinker! I've done it but i'm not out of the woods yet, so get that shit out of sight man...NOW! i step twice, bend over, grab said porn and proceed to the bag that is about to fly down the street and ruin everything.....Got that too... great....(does a quick shuffle about with the bag and wraps it round, right, sorted.
Now, to thank the lovely, kind, married, lady...(honestly, I just wanted to thank her and get the heck out of dodge, as they say.)

I call over and say it's ok, i've found the wallett and we continue to walk back towards each other to say our final greetings. I'm not afraid or nervous now that i have already, secretly decided aginst the porn, it's fucking cursed!! So much so, that i had already done this by the time i called over, slight of hand, chucked the porn into the conveniently close Public bin. done. the next conversation went something like the following....

'Oh hope you're ok, you are ok aren't you?' she said, with a look of true concern(but almost sadness, as if my hurting meant something to her...)'well i think i am' i replied...'thank you so much for helping me out here' i say, placing my right hand in her reciprocated, outstreched hand, 'yeah, i think i'll survive, i've had a lot worse i can tell you!' i say, now cupping our still greeted hands in a friendly fashion. She replied with something that will live with me for the rest of my life....she shot a dry kind of smile and said 'oh i'm sure you'll be happy at home with your porn you naughty boy!'......HOLY SHIT!....she knew, oh my god she saw it and she’s not concerned, she’s fucking weirded out!

I'm still cool, i'm not buying porn because i can't get sex, nothing can phase me, i'm confident, i'm , er, ...busted(i tell myself unreassuringly in my now perspiring head!)I then make a 'yup, you got me' kinda face and ditch for my usual, cheeky sort-of comeback when i feel cornered, it's this or i've been defeated and i'm oficially a sad bastard.........so i shoot her another articulated, sexy look, shrug my shoulders and say....shit....What do i say to the dream woman?......Ok.....Truth and Honesty time.....'Well you'd resort to it if you were in my position, trust me' I said, and laughed a cheeky(if not cringing feeling) little laugh....Right, i've either turned it around, or she thinks i'm a weirdo....ok boy, last chance saloon, wink at her....*Winks!*......Ok, no response yet....She seems to be in thought after what i said, have to make contact again....feeling guiltier by the second and cursing myself in my head for not just using my imagination instead of porn i start to ask 'Are you ok, you seem a bit distant, i hope you....'At this moment she snapped back to reality, looked up at me with puppy dog eyes and said half shrugging, 'well at least it's only porn, you're not hurting anyone' and gave a half smile up at me. She then went on to say that she was sorry, it’s not me at all and she's glad it took her mind off the fact that she had come home this afternoon early to find her husband in bed with some floozy and walked out the door not knowing where to go. This gorgeous woman(who's husband must have been blind and mad not to have been content with) was hurt, betrayed, confused and generally feeling annoyed that all of the offers from some lovely and charming men she had turned down over the last 8 years of marriage have been lost to the annuls of missed opportunity being faithful what was marriage was all about, or so thought or hoped. She had decided to go to her local pub to get her bearings and was walking down the road when, well this happened....

So I'm standing there, thinking to myself(with a look of true concern and empathy on my, by now somewhat confused and bewildered face)now she's here, all alone, with all this rage and sadness and...'in fact', she said, my heart pounding at the anticipation of what she will say....' i think he's a fucking tosser anyway!' I cringe thinking she was was aiming it at me in some underhanded way. ‘not you stupid, my big fat, moody husband!' 'Oh right, i see...'i say scratching my head in a cute bemused manner once again. 'well do you know where you're going to go?' I enquire. She shakes her head, looking as though she's just on the point of tears and losing the battle to fight them back. 'oh lord, come here' I say and open my arms in a friendly manner to give this woman what she needs...a simple hug, from someone who cares..... I embrace her in an unleading fashion not letting the fact i think she's gorgeous start getting to the brain in my trousers again….

So, to cut a (very)long story kind-of shorter, I asked if she would like some no-pressure company took her to the pub and we nursed each others wounds. I told her about my crap relationships and predicament with the ex and going to the bar, she thought this was a noble thing to do and we chatted that afternoon for hours, both forgetting our previous mistakes and choices that we had made in the past. Something in her eye's told me that somehow, at some point, i'd be rewarded for my kindness and nobility.......

The End(at last!!!)

P.s. I'll let you guess whether it was a fact or a fantasy, either way, i hope you found it endearing!


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