Terrified yet Resolute  

heavenly_body39 60F
740 posts
10/28/2005 8:21 am

Last Read:
7/3/2006 7:30 pm

Terrified yet Resolute

It has all been as I imagined, as I intuited.

Lies, deception, conspiring behind my back with a couple we met...to play with on his own...nearly bakers' dozen of women he initiated suggestions of sexy meetings with, all while telling me angrily that I had no right to question him...that I was 'delusional' because he had not been with anyone but me, not sought anyone but me, since we met...

my contacts with other men have been reduced to nearly zero...he is married; in love with a woman he cannot have...I am not even second fiddle, I am third...

My heart is staring into the lion's mouth, its putrid hot breath washing over me.

ohlord give me strength give me courage give me pride and give me love

heavenly_body39 60F
157 posts
10/31/2005 5:09 am

i wrote this on friday morning...today is halloween. it was a very difficult long weekend but we begin anew the promise to be honest with each other, always...which will require courage.

he is,like me i'm sure, not an easy man to love: the payoff has its own rewards!

i will be taking a hiatus from AdultFriendFinder for a while...don't lose me! i will be back in a week or so.

hugs; i will miss you all.


ahughjardon 61
56 posts
10/31/2005 9:22 am

Dear Heavenly, my thoughts and best wishes are with you. I was recently crushed as well, but for reasons I can't begin to fathom and am not even a fiddle at all at the moment. Strength and persistence Heavenly! And love, Ahugh

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