How far are you willing to go?  

goddessofbitches 41M/33F
5317 posts
12/29/2005 8:36 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

How far are you willing to go?

I had a deep conversation with an acquaintance. She works in the office next to mine and we often see each other at lunch, normally when heading out somewhere. So, there we are, talking and all...and she says that she has been having a rough time with things at home. Not to mention that she is trying desperately to keep her relationship together with the man she has been with for about 6 years.

I, being the "relationship goddess", decided to poke for more info to see if I could be of some assistance. She declined to tell me anything at the time because she was still wanting to get to know me and was afraid to share anything to personal too quickly. I understand. Not everything is EVERYONE'S business..too bad there are some people out there that DON'T realize that yet... but anyhow...

She called me this afternoon wanting to talk. She misses me. I took off this week because after paying childcare for BOTH kids while schools out, the amount left over wouldn't be much. the end, I would end up working for free...and that isn't something I really LIKE...

She calls and insists on talking to me about some things that have been going on. She tells me that she has no one else to talk to about the entire thing and would like someone's input. I of course, didn't know at the time how much help I was REALLY going to be, but hey....I offered.

She explained most of everything. How her husband had been with many women...and how she had been with little men. She explained that she loved this man with all her heart and that this man was now wanting more of her. More sexually, emotionally, physically...just overall wanting more.

This leads to the topic of sex and her frustration with his persisting demands of having threesomes, anal sex, and so much more. He truly is a "freak in the sheets" when it comes to bedroom activities. I decided it was time to let her in on one of my little secrets. That I have a blog on a sex site. She was put off by this a little until I explained everything. I am not one who cares what people think about me because I choose to have sex with other women, or keep a blog on sexual experiences. I quite frankly...don't give a damn what anyone thinks.
She listens and actually tells me that she is envious of me. Why? Because I have freedom within myself. What does that mean? Well...I had to ask her that myself. She says that I am free because I don't live in a world of trying to impress my parents, husband, other relatives, friends, co workers and so on. She says that it must be freeing to be able to wake up, throw on whatever I want to wear, and just go do whatever without wondering whether or not some with approve. for my next blog. I will go more into that tomorrow. But for now, I will let you in on some of what she asked me.

She says that her first step is to have anal intercourse with her husband. My I haven't been in THIS situation before with other friends.

Simply put....I don't care who you are, I don't care who your sex partner is....If you are uncomfortable doing something, or just don't want to try it...don't do it. The other person is not worth you risking your self esteem for. Sure...many of you are going to knock what I am saying and would tell the girl to go fuck her asshole off. Pathetic...aren't you?

I say not to do it because the other person should love you, and RESPECT you one way or another. There is no "at least TRY it"...even though there is that saying..."DON'T knock it until you try it"

When it comes to sex with someone you have been with, there does seem to be a point in which you want something to "spice" it up, but, that doesn't mean do it at someone's expense.

Most women and men tend to be lacking in the self esteem department when it comes to sex, why make them feel pressured to do something they feel is degrading for your own sneaking pleasures?

How far are you willing to go to please your partner? Me? I go as far as I want to, and being as I am pretty damn confident as well as cocky.. I will do just about anything....try just about everything.


Always The Bitch

rm_Ptalk1155 34M
3450 posts
12/29/2005 10:34 pm

I find the more someone pressures me to do something, the less likely I am to do it, in bed or otherwise.

rm_goddess1946 106F
13518 posts
12/30/2005 1:26 am

I believe that we gift each other with who we are...mentally, emotionally, all ways. I'm a generous giver
in life and can't imagine being with someone that wasn't also.

In the meantime, Goddess MandyBitchBabe {=}

I have a Happy New Year Idea!! Think we can get it off the ground???

* Blogland Orgasm Day!*
Dec. 31...New Years Eve...

see my blog for details!

Just a little food for thought.............
If you really want to be happy, nobody can stop you...

weineroftheworld 66M

12/30/2005 4:30 am

I've been missin' ya Mandy. Good to see ya back with a most excellent posting.
Personally, I will consider any suggestion my partner has. Will I do anything? Nope.
I like to 'spice it up' but not unless everyone involved is agreeble. It is much better to say "Hey babe would ya like to ...." instead of saying "Hey bitch roll over" (unless thats part of the game LO. The key is MUTUAL RESPECT. If you try something, and you or your partner doesn't like it, do something else.

goldinboy2 60M

12/30/2005 5:49 am

Go as far as you're comfortable with and then just a little farther, sometimes you just don't know unless you try.

Deepthroat215 52M
328 posts
12/30/2005 6:00 am

I am a pleaser. I want everyone to be happy. Now, some say that it's at your expense. I'm someone like you who will try anything once and evaulate later. Sexually speaking I'm more creative and open about it and would investigate ANY request from my wife with excitement and eagerness. However, that only happens when she and the neighbor compare notes (the neighbor has asked her husband for anal and HE'S a little uncomfortable).

SilkenKiera 37F  

12/30/2005 7:08 am


guynamedjim 58M
729 posts
12/30/2005 9:19 am

All's respect for me and to be able to honor the woman I'm with. It should be uplifting to both parties. Mutual satifaction where both parties win.
But here on this site much is imbalanced so no one wins! When sex is just self cented it's not fun at all. Nothing forced is fun! The joy's of loving someone for who they are makes it that much more special and a beautiful thing. With all this instint gradifaction technology really is any easier to reveal who we are., ex. the changing names, downloading images of what we want someone to think we love like.
Thank GOD there are limits, because dealing with the frustrations of this site, and lack of responses, I can be still FREE and dancing along in life, and having fun even when no one is available! AKA ex. painting large house and dancing and singing along the way!


MissAnnThrope 56F
11488 posts
12/30/2005 3:28 pm

I let my limits be known. If someone pressures me for anal, I say no and explain why. If they keep pressing, I offer to get a strap-on, at least equal to their size and do their ass first. So they can see what it feels like. To date, all have declined.

I learned back in the 80s, "Oh, I want to see you with another woman," is best answered with, "OK. As soon as I can see you with another guy." Suddenly, it's gay and stuff.

Men don't seem to realize, if you force a woman to do something that she doesn't want to do, that doesn't turn her on, that doesn't appeal to her in any way and makes her uncomfortable, it's going to turn her off of the act completely, never to be done again and kill her self-esteem, self-worth as a human being and her self-confidence. Way too many men want to treat their wives like porn queens, instead of the Goddesses they are.

But what really pisses me off are these hedonists who married "good girls," thinking they have the magic dick that can turn the good girl into a sex maniac slut who will do anything they want. It shows a complete lack of respect for your partner and says a good bit about your ego. Would she have married him if she knew all of this about him before they got married? If he was making these sexual requests before the I dos were said? Would he have married her if he knew she wasn't going to turn into the porn slut of his dreams?

Men need to realize they can turn their spouses off of touching them completely by making demands and pressuring them into sexual acts they would rather not perform. They can cause resentment to grow and end up wondering why they got married in the first place.

I am constantly telling engaged guys who are getting ready to marry some woman who doesn't have much of a sex drive to not do it. That if they're on this site already, it isn't going to improve once the rings are on the fingers. She isn't going to turn into a sex maniac just because she's married. That they will continue to try to cheat and their resentment towards women in general will grow, as they find there are few women willing to touch married men. About two have listened to me.

But you might want to point out to her, we have all seen the posts on here in the advice line and conversations in the chat rooms where, some guy finally gets his wife to try doing a woman for him. And she ends up leaving him for the woman. Of course after this happens to them, all women are bad. I've even heard stories of straight swap where after a prolonged affair with another couple, those couples will break up, as one partner will fall in love with someone from the other couple. Not to mention stalking stories, etc.

But tell me the truth, Mandy. You've already checked to see if her husband has a profile here, haven't you?

smackyman 46M
3845 posts
12/30/2005 11:01 pm

Pressure from a partner is NOT an attactive thing. The quickest way to turn someone off is to badger them into doing something that they really aren't comfortable with.
Why do I have a sneaking suspicion that of people who pressure their partners - maybe 99% of them would be male?

ArgosPlumyKooky 45F
3902 posts
1/3/2006 8:08 pm

i go only as far as i am comfortable going, and i get turned off and angry with requests to go further once i say NO. no means no dammit. i like missannthropes approach.

rm_badgirl_694u 41F
40 posts
1/3/2006 8:20 pm

"you go girl!" sexual freedom is definitly something i'm comfortable with,although I must admit I havn't always been like this..I was raise with very strict parents...with the cliche..only "badgirls" do this or that. Well thats why the handle I pretty dam confident to be call a badgirl if meaning I free to live my life and express my sexual freedom with my partner.
However I do agree with you that if one is not ready or comfortable with a particular sexual act regardless if their partner want it or not after all its about you and if you can live with the choices you make.

Become a member to create a blog