Another Saturday ......down the tubes  

gladheateher31 44M  
31 posts
8/27/2005 7:41 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Another Saturday ......down the tubes


When my insomnia finally succumbed at 3 this morning, I feel into a blissful slumber. Nyquil is wonderful. I'm always hoping my phone will ring. The mysterious woman that gives me butterflies, old flames from the past, even buddies wanting to hoist a beer later on. Butterflies isn't entirely accurate. This woman robs me of the ability to think. That's saying alot. I was the nerd in high school. Spent several years in the military and now I'm a nerd that can quote the maximum effective ranges of weapon systems and start an IV wearing NVGs. Regardless, nerds think, that's what they do. But alas, things with her have taken a turn into strange territory.

So my phone hasn't rang in days. Maybe the odd wrong number, which I am enjoying more and more. " Is Willie there?" "Nope, he went to the clap clinic, some hoochie burnt him last night". Or " He went to see his baby's momma". My latest project is to paint the outside of my lovely palace, aka my house. If you're from Alabama, you know we have 2 seasons, hot and hotter. With lots of sunshine. I'm fair skinned, and don't do well in the sun. Blame it on my ancestors, the Irish. Or maybe it was the Scots? Who knows. They seemed to do two things well, drink and fornicate, which I'm proud to carry on the tradition. So in a few short hours in the sun, wearing only shorts, my shoulders and back are a nice shade of pink. It seems to accent the freckles. Retiring to the air conditioner, i changed clothes. The shorts were soaked with sweat, something else I seem to be good at, sweating. With a generous supply of aloe on my shoulders, the good green stuff, I was watching tv when i heard a knock on the door.

Imagine my surprise to see my druggie neighbor and the lady that just moved in. She seems nice enough, older, and very flighty. They both had cocktails in thier hand (imagine that). Somehow they had locked the keys in the car (alcohol is funny that way). So they wanted to borrow my phone and call the locksmith. While Flighty was trying to understand the concept of an after hours number, Druggie wanted to know what kind of work i was doing on the house. Painting maybe? Wet brushes drying on the porch, paint stained ladder, the seducing aroma of turpentine, or maybe the new darker color of the trim. Gee, I dunno, what was I doing? By the way, I think she's toothless. Toothless, a drunk, and likes to walk outside with her teets out. Nah, still can't do it.

I think next time I'll answer the door wearing body armor, udt shorts with a very large, very wicked looking kukri knife in my hand. Maybe swim fins and a mask and snorkel too.

AtomicKisss 58M

8/27/2005 10:46 pm

I loved your story.lol Just as much, I am very impressed with your writing style (not that you need it critiqued but it is excetpional).


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