Does being a "nice guy" hurt my chances?  

gh_guy 41M
4 posts
5/12/2006 2:24 pm

Last Read:
5/12/2006 9:20 pm

Does being a "nice guy" hurt my chances?


Today I had a long chat with a woman that I've been getting to know for a few weeks now. She's had enough time to see that I'm a caring, sensitive, compassionate, attractive, honest, loyal, empathetic, and nice guy. It was the first time she revealed to me the impression she had of me, and I have to admit she was right on target. But what brought up the whole discussion was a misunderstanding and a trading of emails about the two of us meeting.

This woman is someone I met on a personals site that doesn't revolve around sex. She's 17 years older than me, which I really like, very very attractive, and has an equally likable personality. The only problem is that she lives five hours away from me. But I decided shortly after we got to chatting that I would be willing to drive to see her if she was receptive to it. Unfortunately, it turns out, she is not. But her reasoning is not what I expected.

Apparently, as she informed me, because of my nice guy persona, she worries that she might develop some romantic feelings towards me, and I can understand her concern. But then she said that other older women might also feel the same way. I was very surprised.

So here I sit, after weeks of persistently trying to find an older woman on here, wondering if maybe I'm destined to fail in my search because of something that everyone who knows me tells me is a very good thing. I never could have imagined that being a good man would ever be blamed for coming up short in the search for sexual intimacy. Especially when I'm not looking for romance or anything resembling it. I want nothing more than to find a woman who, like me, is hungry for some passionate foreplay, sex, and tactile contact.

I am starting to wonder if perhaps I would be better of simply giving up and adopting a chaste mentality. I hear that monks are in short supply these days.

rm_2formorenow 59M/59F

5/12/2006 4:38 pm

keep looking,remember its quality not quanity. an old sayin of mine,ate 3 days ago, slept in a bed 6 months ago and got laid last year,what more can a man want.anticipation


woofff 41F

5/12/2006 8:05 pm

How about allowing a wider demography to play a part in the whole effort?

I just had to laugh when I got to her reason...lol ... hadn't seen it coming!!

Still shaking her head and laughing,
Woofff


gh_guy 41M

5/12/2006 8:10 pm

woofff, I'm not against meeting someone my age at all. I guess the reason I hope for someone older is simply because I've been attracted to older women since I was in high school. Why that is, I have no idea.


gh_guy 41M

5/12/2006 8:12 pm

    Quoting rm_2formorenow:
    keep looking,remember its quality not quanity. an old sayin of mine,ate 3 days ago, slept in a bed 6 months ago and got laid last year,what more can a man want.anticipation
I totally agree about quality vs. quantity. I think that's what makes the search much more tedious. Thank goodness I'm patient, though I imagine my post made me sound otherwise.


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