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It is Christmas Eve
It is Christmas Eve
I sit here this night to contimplate the year past, it's highs and it's lows, listening to Josh Grobin.
Life has been sort of a blur since May, Father nearly died, I had to take over the management of his house, a task not welcomed as the house was and is in great disrepair from lack of attention.
June and I have realized I have little choice but to move into this house to clean, fix, and ready it for the eventual return of my Father and be there to look to his needs. Realization that this would one day be me I could not let the one woman to whom my soul is linked have to bear any cost or grief when it did happen. I gave her the needed excuse to leave me and end the marriage and moved out.
July to September much work done on the house on weekends and when I was not to tired from work. The plant has a curing oven at 380*F. throughout production hours and in the summer months temps on the floor can reach 100. The work is very physical for most of the employees, my job is only as physical as I choose to make it and I choose to make it physical often. In this period I dropped 28 pounds, worked out enough to reach the same physcal condition I was in 15 years ago.
September to now. Changes at work have required shifting schedules several times and some weekends kept the mind and body stressed. The changes will be complete 14, January, 2006, then the testing and balancing of the system begins. This phase of the changes will not be as stressed and a new year will be underway, the divorce final, hopefully a balance will be found to the work and some relaxation.
A different life has been choosen one that most of the family would not understand. This life is the one I lived when I was single, flirtaous, sexual and alone a great deal. This time I have an edge in that I have made friends within this community and it is where I choose to be. Amoung people who do not hide what they feel or that the feelings exsist. Another factor of this life here is that I now moderate a group, small but growing and have made some contacts close by who may keep me in a loop of parties and get togethers. A core is forming with the group and we will continue to urge our other members to join in the board discussions and become involved in the planning and execusion of Meet and Greets and in drawing other members to the group.
Right or wrong these are the choices I have made this year and as it come to an end I have no complaints, I have work, a roof over my head and food to eat, there are to many who have none of that, so this year ends well. Happy new Year Y'all