AMERICAN INDEPENDENCE REVOKED  

funintheday2006 56M
8366 posts
8/10/2006 4:11 am

Last Read:
8/14/2006 9:06 pm

AMERICAN INDEPENDENCE REVOKED


As I will not have time to post for a day or so due to the pressures of REAL WORLD her is something I would like to share:

To the citizens of the United States of America, in the light of your failure to elect a competent President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective today.
Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth
II will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths and other territories. Except Utah, which she does not fancy. Your new
prime minister (The Right Honourable Tony Blair, MP for the 97.85% of you who have until now been unaware that there is a world outside your
borders) will appoint a minister for America without the need for further elections.
Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A
questionnaire will be circulated next year to determine whether any of you noticed. To aid in the transition to a British Crown Dependency,
the following rules are introduced with immediate effect:

1. You should look up revocation in the Oxford English Dictionary. Then look up aluminium. Check the pronunciation guide. You will be
amazed at just how wrongly you have been pronouncing it. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'favour' and 'neighbour'; skipping the letter 'U' is nothing more than laziness on your part.
Likewise, you will learn to spell 'doughnut' without skipping half the letters. You will end your love affair with the letter 'Z' (pronounced
'zed' not 'zee') and the suffix ize will be replaced by the suffix ise. You will learn that the suffix 'burgh' is pronounced 'burra' e.g.
Edinburgh. You are welcome to respell Pittsburgh as 'Pittsberg' if you can't cope with correct pronunciation.
Generally, you should raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. Look up vocabulary.
Using the same twenty seven words interspersed with filler noises such as "like" and "you know" is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication. Look up interspersed.
There will be no more 'bleeps' in the Jerry Springer show. If you're not old enough to cope
with bad language then you shouldn't have chat shows. When you learn to develop your vocabulary then you won't have to use bad language as often.

2. There is no such thing as "US English". We will let Microsoft know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take
account of the reinstated letter 'u' and the elimination of -ize.

3. You should learn to distinguish the English and Australian accents. It really isn't that hard. English accents are not limited to
cockney, upper-class twit or Mancunian (Daphne in Frasier). You will also have to learn how to understand regional accents - Scottish
dramas such as Taggart will no longer be broadcast with subtitles.
While we're talking about regions, you must learn that there is no such place as Devonshire in England. The name of the county is Devon.
If you persist in calling it Devonshire, all American States will become shires, e.g. Texasshire, Floridashire, Louisianashire.

4. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as the good guys. Hollywood will be required to cast English actors to
play English characters. British sit-coms such as Men Behaving Badly or Red Dwarf will not be re-cast and watered down for a wishy-washy
American audience who can't cope with the humour of occasional political incorrectness.

5. You should relearn your original national anthem, God Save The Queen, but only after fully carrying out task #1. We would not want you to get confused and give up half way through.

6. You should stop playing American football. There is only one kind of football. What you refer to as American football is not a very good
game.
The 2.15% of you who are aware that there is a world outside your borders may have noticed that no one else plays American football. You will no longer be allowed to play it, and should instead
play proper football. Initially, it would be best if you played with the girls. It is a difficult game. Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which is similar to American "football", but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty
seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like nancies). We are hoping to get together at least a US Rugby sevens side by 2008. You should stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host an event called the 'World Series' for a game which is not played outside of America. Since only 2.15% of you are aware that there is a world beyond your borders, your error is understandable. Instead of baseball, you will be allowed to play a girls' game called rounders,
which is baseball without fancy team strip, oversized gloves, collector cards or hotdogs.

7. You will no longer be allowed to own or carry guns. You will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more dangerous in public
than a vegetable peeler. Because we don't believe you are sensible enough to handle potentially dangerous items, you will require a
permit if you wish to carry a vegetable peeler in public.

8. July 4th is no longer a public holiday. November 2nd will be a new national holiday, but only in England. It will be called Indecisive
Day.

9. All American cars are hereby banned. They are crap and it is for your own good. When we show you German cars, you will understand what
we mean. All road intersections will be replaced with roundabouts.
You will start driving on the left with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go metric with immediate effect and conversion tables.
Roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense
of humour.

10. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries are not real chips. Fries aren't even French, they are Belgian
though 97.85% of you (including the guy who discovered fries while in Europe) are not aware of a country called Belgium. Those things you
insist on calling potato chips are properly called crisps. Real chips are thick cut and fried in animal fat. The traditional accompaniment to chips is beer, which should be served warm and flat. Waitresses will be trained to be more aggressive with customers.

11. As a sign of penance 5 grams of sea salt per cup will be added to all tea made within the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, this quantity
to be doubled for tea made within the city of Boston itself.

12. The cold tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually beer at all, it is lager. From November 1st only proper British Bitter will be referred to as beer, and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as Lager. The substances formerly known as American Beer will henceforth be referred to as Near-Frozen Knat's Urine, with the exception of the product of the American Budweiser company whose product will be referred to as Weak Near-Frozen Knat's Urine. This will allow true Budweiser (as manufactured for the last 1000 years in Pilsen, Czech Republic) to be
sold without risk of confusion.

13. From November 10th the UK will harmonise petrol (or Gasoline, as you will be permitted to keep calling it until April 1st 2005) prices
with the former USA. The UK will harmonise its prices to those of the former USA and the Former USA will, in return, adopt UK petrol prices
(roughly $6/US gallon - get used to it).

14. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that you're not adult enough to be independent. Guns should only be handled by adults. If you're not adult enough to sort
things out without suing someone or speaking to a therapist then you're not grown up enough to handle a gun.

15. Please tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us crazy.

16. Tax collectors from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all revenues due (backdated to
1776).

Courtesy of John Cleese. Send your complaints to him.

JuicyBBW1001 54F

8/10/2006 4:27 am

On a serious note. My thoughts are with the people of the UK today as I am hearing of terror threats this morning. May God hold you all in the palm of his hand.

Juicy


funintheday2006 replies on 8/10/2006 4:53 am:
Thanks babe, thats one of my pressures, my business deals with certain airports

freetime648 52F

8/10/2006 4:45 am

Although this was from the great John Cleese....should I be offended at all??? I mean I make no habits of chewing on ALUMINUM and I think I speak and spell very well thank you!!!! Even if it is US English..... And to me DOUGHNUTS have and always will be doughnuts...not DONUTZ ...... I like the ones with the sprinkles too!

Done rambling now......on with what your were doing and see ya when ya get back.....



xx FREETIME648 xx


funintheday2006 replies on 8/10/2006 4:54 am:
Ah, you came to Europe and were huumanised so you're half Brit anyway. I would expect you to be a proper speaker of wot is our langwidj

freetime648 52F

8/10/2006 4:47 am

By the way.....the also Great Robin Williams once said....."with all the stipulations on the english language...it is no wonder US "americans" hauled balls to get out of there!!!"




xx FREETIME648 xx


funintheday2006 replies on 8/10/2006 4:55 am:
I love that guy, he is a fucking lunatic, the American Cleese

angelofmercy5 58F
17881 posts
8/10/2006 5:24 am

Listening to the news this morning......and praying for all of us travelers today!


funintheday2006 replies on 8/10/2006 5:38 am:
Amen

rm_Benkai7 55M
2358 posts
8/10/2006 5:35 am

Dear "funintheday2006".

... goshhh ... I remember the last party ...
but sorry,

... the beer ... ask for irish or german ... if you don愒 know where to get it ... go for the yellow pages ... they惻l know ...

Benkai7 - just a poor Ronin marching by ...


funintheday2006 replies on 8/10/2006 5:39 am:
Sensei, Germans do lager, British do beer. Not that I like either. Red Wine man. Drunk quicker on less fluid!!

BaronessK 52F

8/10/2006 5:42 am

Good...I'll get to carry the title for real now, without having to get dual citizenship with Germany! But Tony Blair...that's a revolt in the making with that revolting thought!

I'm from the south...if something gets in our way...like constanants...we slur over them. Deal...as a country who drops their h's and other letters, you should understand anyway! Except for Bostonians and the like...you can have them back, cuz they talk funny! Aussies sound like Australians, Brits sound British, and the Scottish have burrs but they are quite comprehensible to me, thank you, and all are readily distinguished from another so who bothers with reading the subtitles? Then again, I didn't turn them on for Ozzy Osbourne, either...and I understood HIM.

Please do stop them from screwing up 'brit-coms'! I already know God Save the Queen, and no one can sing the national anthem we have now anyway. As for the sports...damn straight...for what we pay them to 'play'...let 'em have to take it and make it like a MAN! All sports is about sex, so unless it actually involves sex...I don't care about sports anyway...so .

You might have a...'problem' about guns...especially with Texas...they have more guns per capita per person except...maybe...the Armed Forces. But we will allow you to take Bush's and especially Chaney's weapons away, immediately. Give them Nerf guns with foam darts, but no peelers. November 2 is what? Oh, the day we give our comedians new material to work with for 4 years! {You should be talking...here's a lager raised in toast for the continued good health of our Queen Mum...as no one wishes to see big eared git up in your country no more than we do the big eared git in this one}.

I already understand British humour, thank you...and of course German cars are great...duh! I know how to make real bangers and chips, thank you as well, wouldn't bother to spit on the French, and Belgium is where Dame Agatha Christie's fictional detective Hercule Poirot was from. Again, Texas and a few others will fight to the death over warm {i.e. piss} beer, although some of our 'beer' is not much better cold or hot. And you obviously haven't dealt much with American women waitresses....

At least it's sea salt...no iodine...which I am allergic to. BTW, do you really think the 'upper crust' that you speak of drink anything but bottled water anyway? Again, re Texas...they have oil wells and soda drinkers...they will not pay that much for anything except water, beer, land, cattle, and high class hookers.

Somewhere along the way we forgot what all we fought so hard to get; some of the younger generation are 'nancies'...just like in your country, btw. Re: JFK and our "Freedom of Information Act"...no dice...unless you replace the CIA and FBI etcetera with Scotland Yard or what have you. As for tax collectors...I assume you mean after you figure out how to disarm Texas and the rest?

John Cleese...now there's a mate and half, ain't he? Even that snog with Tim Curry wasn't, well, THAT 'weird'...so must be something in the water of the BBC! You know, just because we are so nice...how about we give you Canada back?


I went to a news site, which I never do...and I was saddened. It must be part of your job to keep those safe...but keep yourself safe as well.


funintheday2006 replies on 8/10/2006 6:15 am:
I understood every word of that so I've booked a therapist long term (discount that way) I've had a lot of love letters from Texas for you, I'll pass them on(with bullets taken out)

My work is not in the security sector but, we supply to airports and air companies so my issues are logistical and important only to those poor buggers stood in the departure halls and my bank manager.
Just hope this was not just another false alarm and they have caught real terrorists. Our emergenct level is critical so things are going to get worse before better I'm afraid.
Poor devils who have saved for a year or more for a 2 week break in the sun are who I feel for right now. 50 weeks of hard work and some arsehole disrupts the only break you get.
Trivial in the greater scheme of things maybe but, only to those of us not going.

papyrina 50F
21133 posts
8/10/2006 6:32 am

i've seen this before but still funny take care


I'm a

and
i'm here to stay


funintheday2006 replies on 8/10/2006 6:40 am:
Thanks Papy, it was our very own Mr Fawlty Towers

000TBoy 42M
194 posts
8/10/2006 6:44 am

Morning Fun. Here here! Yes I very much concur. I've been thinking about a career change for some time and will gladly take the position of overseeing and implementing these changes forthwith. I will be known as Lord Chief Overseer Of The Newly Reclaimed & Therefore Improved Netherregions /Annexe?

I will need some tools for this job;

1. A big stick
2. An unnecesarily large hat (with feather)
3. A long purple mantle (plush fabric, ermine bordered)
4. A ring to be kissed by our new ubjects/ employees (I'll provide my own)

Yours etc. etc. 000TBoy


funintheday2006 replies on 8/10/2006 7:01 am:
The job is yours, how could the monarchy refuse such a magnanimous offer fro someone obviously well suited to the position. Perhaps yoou can send us your measurments for the ermine coat and crown you wioll obviously be entitled to.

Animal_73 43M
64 posts
8/10/2006 7:18 am

Ah the great John Cleese. Didnt he marry a yank shrink in the end?? would be about right for him after all his years in Monty Python!!


funintheday2006 replies on 8/10/2006 7:34 am:
He did and she is now in therapy!!! He was always crazy, made Spike Milligan look almost sane. You should read Spike, he was totally off his rocker. I liked him

expatbrit49 62M

8/10/2006 8:29 am

Do you have a favorite Commenter, some one you just cant wait to read what they say about one of your posts…… well here’s your chance to nominate them for the Best Blog Commenter………. Posts, Comments, and Responses

Ok.. so I spammed your blog and now I’m not on your favorite commenter list anymore.. sorry, but I know you cant stay at me for long

Thank You for Your Time and Attention


funintheday2006 replies on 8/10/2006 8:43 am:
Bollocks me old cocker, everyone is invited to spam here, how else would I know whats going on. You have an open invite to spam as much as you want here. Pimp, whore, spam you go for it, no permission needed, I dont own the site

helga_hansen 49F  
1987 posts
8/10/2006 9:36 am

John Cleese married a shrink? Are you not perhaps confusing him with Billy Connelly's other half, Pamela Stephenson, who writes as Dr. Pamela Stephenson, and she is definitely a shrink! Although... she's a Kiwi... hhmmm... I'm confused too.

Anyhoo... good post.. I have seen it before, and anything John turns his hand to always makes me smile!

♥♥HH♥♥


Love, hugs and kisses from ♥♥HH♥♥


funintheday2006 replies on 8/10/2006 9:40 am:
You've seen him masturbating?? Wow, that musta been something

The man is a legend ( As opposed to a leg end which, as we all know, is called a foot and any man that has a foot really needs to turn his hand to something.. I'd better stop)

MOfunNOWWOW 55F

8/10/2006 9:48 am

Cleese and his lot are too few in this world gone mad. Thankful they caught them. Cleese is the sane one to keep us laughing..too many are trying to kill each other.

Tony Blair???? Isn't that the President's boy???

Dunkin me a donut now {=}


MOMO
just a squirrel trying to get a nut


funintheday2006 replies on 8/10/2006 9:54 am:
No, No. Baloney Blair is Gush's TOY BOY. They are so far up each others arses they smell shit 24/7
Castrate em both without anasthetic for my next video post, that good?

helga_hansen 49F  
1987 posts
8/10/2006 9:51 am

You're scaring me with the speed you're replying to my posts!! Do you ever do any work?? Sorry that today's events are impacting on business... got any idea where I can invest in clear plastic bags? I would set up a stall at Heathrow and make a killing...

♥♥HH♥♥


Love, hugs and kisses from ♥♥HH♥♥


funintheday2006 replies on 8/10/2006 9:57 am:
Now there is a strange thing. Im online all day trying to re-organise the crap, track vshicles and YES, arrange for more bags to be delivered. As I write this a vehicle is enroute to a different place with a big load of them. They give them out free hon, no boot opportuity there I'm afraid

helga_hansen 49F  
1987 posts
8/10/2006 9:52 am

Hhhmmm... it was after I pushed the "send" button that I realised my choice of phrase might come across a bit suspect!

Love, hugs and kisses from ♥♥HH♥♥


funintheday2006 replies on 8/10/2006 9:58 am:
I tried to ignore it and you bring attention to it

rm_sheople 45M
42 posts
8/10/2006 10:11 am

To: John Cleese and funintheday2006

Subject: Revocation of American Independence

Unfortunately, I only now receive your letter. Nevertheless, I have a few general comments on this subject, and then briefly address your concerns.

Firstly, it is high time that you English admit that your country has never recovered from World War II's devastation. Obviously, you no longer lead or dictate policy to the world, and it is high time that you learned to cope with your diminished capacity in present-day world affairs. And while your largely socialist welfare state is merely a shadow of your major world economic and military influence prior to 1940, you have become the international back-room laughing stock. Your economy in shambles, and your armed forces can’t even police London streets and subways, or the IRA, much less deter any foreign threat. What's more, you have disarmed your law-abiding citizens, and in doing so made them easy prey to bandits, terrorists, and tax collectors. That reminds me, you English are obsessed with collecting taxes, aren't you?

During the course of our busy workday schedules in America, we occasionally pause and ponder the plight of the less fortunate in the world. That said, in your case, her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II is welcome to exercise the same amount of political power over us as she does over you in England–none whatsoever. Of course, we do adore her costume; perhaps we should dance at Halloween over tea and crumpets sometime?

The Right Honorable Tony Blair, MP whom stood behind the UN Security Council and our President Bush against the War on Terror following 9/11 is welcome to come visit us anytime he pleases. We admire him, even if he is a labor, pardon me, labour party leader.

And now to the list...

1. I looked up "revocation" in the Oxford English Dictionary: "1. end the validity or operation of (a decree, decision, or promise)"
Obviously, you Brits still can’t live with your defeat at the hands of the American Colonists in the Revolutionary War and the War of 1812. You can't revoke our independence from you. Live with it. You lost.

Speak out loud the word "aluminium." You can’t avoid placing the emphasis on the last two syllables, on the ending, not the root word “alumen” itself. Now speak out loud the word “aluminum.” You naturally place the emphasis on the root portion of the word, don’t you? Stick around Brit, you may just learn a thing or two
Finally, I propose that we write you a language efficiency guide proposing the elimination of unnecessary letters like "u in ou", "g in gh", "p in pb", "d in dn", "n in mn", "s in sl", "g in gn", "b in bt", etc. from the English language, and truthfully merely enrich remedial English instructors and blabbering Cockney malcontents.

2. Thank God–or whomever is your spiritual higher power–, that there is no such thing as "US English." This clearly shows how Americans have distanced themselves from England following winning their independence. However, it is faintly quaint how Microsoft insists on perpetuating your antiquated dialect.

3. Why should Americans bother learning to distinguish between English and Australian accents?

4. Change Hollywood (Bollywood)? Now you really are dreaming. Even Americans won’t try changing that nuthouse. That’s it, I'm convinced...you need help.

5. Learn the words to "God Save the Queen"? We Americans have never really understood why the Queen needs to be saved. Hasn't she been saved yet? It seems to me that some British gentleman should get off his keister and save her, because you've sure been begging God to do it for long enough, and it doesn't appear He feels it's an urgent matter. Come to think of it, I suppose you may be a bit jealous of us as we tend to be on God's side of affairs–look up "Abraham Lincoln."

6. We'll just have to agree to disagree on this one. What’s more, I think that it is the UK that is confused on this subject, not us. In America, we call the game denoted football, football; yet in England, you call Rugby football. I suggest that you suffer from Rugby PMS. And the kevlar body “armor”? Lets just say that we don’t use our game of football for mass population control like you Brits do. "The first thing we do," said the character in Shakespeare's Henry VI, is "kill all the lawyers." We're working on it. Note that we have rugby, but it is only played at secret locations and times to avoid insurance auditors and lawyers.
Stop playing baseball? Well, the Seattle Mariners, our local MLB team, show up on game day, but apparently, they’ve stopped playing baseball, so you win that one.

7. Sure thing on the guns, just come on over and start taking them from us. You might want to bring some of that American Football kevlar body armor with you as well as a lot of your Australian army buddies with you. And plan on it taking a loooooooooong time. Hint look up the word "infinity" in your Oxford Dictionary.
A final note, I suggest that you get used to hearing the words “Go ahead, make my day” and “So, do you feel lucky Brit?...Well do ya?”

8. See item 1 (above). Face it, you’re in denial. You lost. L-O-S-T It’s over...move on.

9. Finally, something we agree on. As a matter of fact, we agreed with the American Car problem a long time ago. That’s why the American car companies now own most of the European car companies (look up "Jaguar is now owned by Ford"). Yes, we do need help with our traffic system and there are far too few roundabouts on our roadways. That said, I think we'll outsource our traffic problems to Sweden. They have Volvos (look up "Ford owns Volvo") so they are used to designing traffic flows for heavy, powerful vehicles, not dinky, under-powered British horseless carriages.

10. Belgium is a country??? I thought it was a chocolate manufacturer.

11. Penance? So, you’re still dwelling in denial? See my answers to items 1, 7, and 8 (above).

12. I can't speak to the opinions of other Americans, but you have valid points regarding beer. Guiness, however, beats anything else you have hollow. Imagine what those Scotts could do if you guys got out of their business! One final note, I am a direct descendent of a Scottish line that fought in and won the first Scottish War of Independence against England in the late 13th and 14th centuries AD. My ancestor commanded troops for William Wallace and later Robert the Bruce.

13. Synchronize US gas prices with UK gas prices? Even though this already appears to be happening, it will not finish until the UK drills the same ratio of oil domestically as it imports, as does the USA.

14. In regards to learning to resolve problems without guns, lawyers, etc. perhaps you should remove the word "victim" from your dictionary and return the words "defense" and "backbone". Meanwhile, I rumor has it that in several states that we're already dispensing with lawyers and therapists and escalating straight to guns in order to make the dispute processes less time consuming.

15. Who killed JFK? It's driving you crazy??? So THAT'S what happened to you guys! [See comments above]

16. Collect taxes back dated to 1776? You are welcome to try that as soon as you: (1) repay the 30 Billion dollars (in 1940-1945 dollars) plus interest that we lent you as part of the WWII Lend Lease program, and (2) confiscate our guns, thereby removing our ability to protect ourselves, much as you did to law-abiding English citizens. I hear that recently there have even been rumblings in your Parliament about going after bows-and-arrows, steak and pocket knives, vegetable peelers, skate-keys, tire irons, baseball bats, hoes, picks, shovels, socket wrenches, table lamps, hammers, bicycle tire pumps, toilet plungers, motor vehicles, sex-toys, and even…gasp!…methane gas...to name a few things. Tsk, tsk, tsk, face it Brit, as a people, it appears that you're inbreeding is finally weighing heavily upon you.

Sincerely,
sheople


funintheday2006 replies on 8/10/2006 12:03 pm:
Pompous git, I aint got time now but, i'm coming back to you on this one in the morning.
In the meantime O teacher of history and evadrer of facts remember, WE DID NOT ELECT BUSH, YOU DID. Before you mention old Tony in Downing St, the only reason we put him there was that there are impregnable gates at either end of the street. We were not to know he had a key.
I'll be back,

Oh, welcome btw

funintheday2006 replies on 8/10/2006 12:03 pm:
Be warned, next time I'll use spell check

MOfunNOWWOW 55F

8/10/2006 11:02 am

No, No. They are so far up each others asses they know what color each other's bowel movement will be
but on the same page with ya anyway


MOMO
just a squirrel trying to get a nut


funintheday2006 replies on 8/10/2006 12:04 pm:
same tune, different lyrics

CognitiveVoodoo 45F

8/10/2006 2:23 pm

I love you.

Will you marry me?


funintheday2006 replies on 8/10/2006 9:05 pm:
With a body like that, I'm willing to give it a dry run first. Maybe even a wet one if you're quick
Welcome babe, naughty blog you have
Anybody need wanking tips, take a look

amoldenough 69F
16436 posts
8/10/2006 3:22 pm

Very entertaining post. I'm glad that everything turned out OK over there.

"Don't cry because it's over; smile because it happened."


funintheday2006 replies on 8/10/2006 9:06 pm:
Thanks hon, lets hope it stays that way

BaronessK 52F

8/10/2006 3:31 pm

Now, foto, hun...you misunderstood...that I was raised mostly in Texas {where men are MEN and women are damn glad of it!}; I was saying that Texas would fight to keep their beer {although it seems I rambled, as usual, into incoherency! The references to panther-piss and/or warm beer in general was directed at Ala-f'n-bama and other 'southern' states that I have been in. Shiner Bock...doubt this redneck area has it, but I'll hunt it down to try it. I used to drink Coors here...but the damn barman kept giving me change for a dollar when I prounounced my order! Oh...and of course I'm jealous that I no longer live in Texas...they understand me...well my accent anyway! I still understand Ron White's point about "Come to Texas and kill someone...and we will kill you back!" You from Texas, hmmmm...got a couple of...days...to remind me why I miss Texans so much? Oh and get a load of the 'slots' when I popped in! funintheday2006 next to makesupregnant next to RottenApple70!

fun: Don't be agreeing with me, it discombobulates me, damn it!


funintheday2006 replies on 8/10/2006 9:10 pm:
I was in a good mood, I agreed with everybody. I'm ok now bitch. Foto, I am sorry mate, this piece of arse is an upside down, inside out, people carrier with 7 seats. Therws only room for her though, go figure. She uses Texas coz its the only state name she can spell and it anagrams out to AT SEX or SEX? Ta ( thank you in UK slang). Hope you're getting the gist here photo, she can be confusing, all of her. Now you be careful you dont run into her in Siam when one of her goes for therapy.

ella1966 50F
1528 posts
8/10/2006 3:52 pm

You are a way too smart for me, and I am way too sick to comment on this properly at the moment, but I love it!!!!!


funintheday2006 replies on 8/10/2006 9:10 pm:
Thanks Ell, take care

Balibabe19 41F

8/10/2006 4:22 pm

Oh Shit...where does that leave us Aussies??

WAIT!!!
Don't answer that!!!

*shudders*


funintheday2006 replies on 8/10/2006 9:12 pm:
I am working on a beut

catkit13 66F

8/10/2006 5:36 pm

NO BASEBALL??? would you please delay the imposition of this particular rule until the cubs win the (what do we call it now?) series?
NO LAWYERS??? damn, i'll have to go on the dole
cat in tucson, arizonashire


funintheday2006 replies on 8/10/2006 9:14 pm:
You can me a Solicitor, oh wait, you solicit already dontcha?? You try to crush men at lunch. Na, sorry you're gonna have to play baseball with all the pussies. OO, that sounds like fun, might play myself

maverick1255 51M
3953 posts
8/10/2006 7:37 pm

Ok, I'm ready for any change! God save the Queen!!!


funintheday2006 replies on 8/10/2006 9:15 pm:
From what??

rm_sexxikritter 52F
2715 posts
8/10/2006 8:05 pm

5. You should relearn your original national anthem, God Save The Queen, but only after fully carrying out task #1. We would not want you to get confused and give up half way through.

Well, at least it will be easier to sing then the song we slaughter now.


funintheday2006 replies on 8/10/2006 9:16 pm:
Oh, the Far strangled Fanny song??

rm_iwannatellu 45F
933 posts
8/11/2006 5:06 am

ROTFLMAO!

Crying with laughter...

thanks


funintheday2006 replies on 8/11/2006 5:34 am:
You are more than welcome my love Glad you enjoyed

crmark666 67M

8/11/2006 4:04 pm

¡me gusto mucho!

'Pura Vida'


funintheday2006 replies on 8/11/2006 9:57 pm:
Yo cr Is that painful??

Damn_Dilemma 49F

8/12/2006 7:26 am

How Educational, I'm lost for words
Its like reading the American dollar " In God We Trust " yet they have never met or seen him but they won't trust those they know and can see, Wierd!!
The English, shame, as much as I love living in the UK, the "God Save the Queen" really gets to me especially since who can really say why must she be saved? Has she done anything for you or me?, Not for me, no, maybe for you, I can't say
There is one thing I do believe tho as is an English saying " An Englishman's house is his castle "
I believe so is my home mine too.
Guess I'm an emotional and sensitive person and everything I do and say comes with passion and those who don't like it can either like it or lump it.
Don't know why I can't stay away from your blog
Something keeps drawing me back here {=}


funintheday2006 replies on 8/14/2006 12:54 am:
Itll be me, Im a nutter. We have viewing magnets on our arses

Bloody_Quandary 49F

8/12/2006 8:25 am

{=}{=}{=} back, hope you well
There is one thing I do believe tho as is an English saying " An Englishman's house is his castle " i love me fookin windmill in t'middle of Wigan and keep forgettin' me meant to lie in fookin hilland me seen the queen last week and she made me a jam buttie and one for me daughter too. me daughter looked at me and said 'wots that smell mummy? i said oh fook i've shit mesel again love and she fooked off all emotional and passionate like well she like
Don't know why I can't stay away from your blog
Something keeps drawing me back here {=}


funintheday2006 replies on 8/14/2006 12:57 am:
Nice photo, I hope its not fake

Bloody_Quandary 49F

8/12/2006 8:28 am

Sorry beautiful ~smiles~ me already pissed and it not even 5 o'clock ~smiles and falls of computer chair~


HeatedCondition 60M
890 posts
8/14/2006 12:15 am

Well ok. But could you ship me a Union Jack? They're fresh out around here.

Does this mean I have to start calling guys "mate"?

BUT I'm NOT giving up cold beer, and that's nonnegotiable!

HeatedCondition


funintheday2006 replies on 8/14/2006 12:56 am:
Thats ok you can dring LAGER, thats served cold, beer is served at piss temperasture and tastes the same.
There will be plenty of union jacks and we suggest mate as an alternative to bud as we believe that affinity to an alcoholic beverage is unhealthy.

HeatedCondition 60M
890 posts
8/14/2006 5:40 pm

"Thats ok you can dring LAGER, thats served cold, beer is served at piss temperasture and tastes the same."

Ok, I'll go for that.

"There will be plenty of union jacks and we suggest mate as an alternative to bud as we believe that affinity to an alcoholic beverage is unhealthy."

Good point. It's done, now I'll work on my British accent and learning to use an 's' instead of a 'z' in various words.

HeatedCondition


funintheday2006 replies on 8/14/2006 9:06 pm:
Thats ma boy

Become a member to create a blog