Painting in the Buff  

frogger1995 39F
4342 posts
10/29/2005 6:38 am

Last Read:
9/26/2006 6:19 pm

Painting in the Buff

Here is another one from a while back. I decided to paint my bedroom by myself in order to fully appreciate my sense of self-accomplishment as a new homeowner. While what happened (all utterly true btw) didn't seem so funny at the time, reading it in retrospect is quite hilarious.


I began painting my bedroom this weekend. I decided on "Scented Valentine" as my final choice. Who knew there were so many versions of pink! For the 99.9% of people out there who have never tried to paint "Scented Valentine" on thier walls, it requires about 3 coats to actually look like it does on the paint sample card. Thus I had to spend more time painting than I originally anticipated. This leads me to the title of this entry.

So, just how does one end up painting in the buff? I will show you in just 9 easy steps:

1. Begin painting wearing your throw-away shorts and tank top.

2. Use the long handled paint roller in, say, the same manner that someone in the middle of an epileptic fit might use it, drenching throw-away tank top in "Scented Valentine" paint. [Note: Paint does not have to be "Scented Valentine"]

3. Remove throw-away tank top once it begins to cling to torso

4. Somehow manage to sit in paint tray full of "Scented Valentine" paint, thus drenching the backside of not only your throw-away shorts but your undies as well.

5. Remove both throw-away shorts and undies (now also throw-away) once they begin to cling to ass.

6. Continue painting like a lunatic.

7. Manage to get handle in contact with ceiling fan running at full speed, not only dislodging ceiling fan, but getting "Scented Valentine" paint specks all over black satin sheets on bed and the only piece of clothing you have left on, your bra

8. Realize that this is your GOOD bra you paid $65 for and remove it to avoid further damage.

9. Congratulations! You are now painting in the buff.

Things to be Happy About:

A Bedroom in the Color of your Choice
Silly E-mail Messages
Digital Cameras
Brie Cheese
Sparkling Cider

digdug41 49M

10/29/2005 10:53 am

#7 soundlike something the three stooges would have done hope ya had fun lmao

roaming the cyber streets of blogland

ewan_1973 44M

10/29/2005 11:05 am

Here it does not happen because we build out of cartoon (more or less, you get the point). Try to paint houses in Europe that are 100 years old. You have to apply products to get like 10 coats of old paint off. These products to use are extremly narcotic, it is like smoking pot. Two of the biggest mistakes in my life were committed under the influence of those substances.

Thanks, Frogger, really for your attention to my mild, really mild complain. You ignore my offer about my secretarial-blogging services. I also cook, iron, do grocery shopping. I really cook well. I left home and country very young and I had to learn. I do not know how long all of us addicted to you can hold it without fresh material. I think you should give it a thought. I am also wondering about the real state of things: are you wondering wether you will meet people again, or not really?

Lastly, I was a little serious. Even if it was not for sex, if I took a Chicago-Houston flight, would you spend like an hour with me? Is there any other room needing painting? Any shirts to iron? Are you eating as well as your mom would want you to eat?

Love, Ewan.

Jobe00 42M
211 posts
10/29/2005 1:36 pm

Hmmm...that sounds like it would have been quite a show. You know you might be able to charge admission the next time you paint? It could cover the cost of your wardrobe and new bed sheets.

frogger1995 39F

10/29/2005 2:56 pm

Frnds4Play: Lol you're typing kind of like me with one hand. Is one of your hands out of commmission? or are you just doing something else with it....

digdug41: It does...although I'm not sure how many fans they would have had had they completed all the steps

ewan_1973: Oh ewan...what to say? Why don't you just call me. check your messages

longhairednikki: Ever since my kitchen "incident" I do need to repaint the cabinets...

Jobe00: perhaps it will make up for teh cost of new sheets and undies.

Gosh it took me about 20 minutws to write that! damn you left hand!

rm_bella_ 47F
4030 posts
10/29/2005 3:12 pm

Painting in the buff great but i support anything done in the buff

JarrodSparrow 33M

10/29/2005 3:48 pm

Wow...painting in the nude? I guess I've just never gotten covered that much...

I'd love to see that show though...hell, I might even chip in about 5 bucks to see it!


rm_simon234233 39M
37 posts
10/29/2005 4:37 pm

Oh well, sounded like great fun! Did the paint job look good in the end?

ewan_1973 44M

10/29/2005 6:30 pm

Frogger: messages, what messages? I have checked the following: hotmail inbox, yahoo inbox, hotmail junk mail, yahoo spam, yahoo IM messages left while I was off line, AdultFriendFinder messages, AOL inbox, AOL IM, cel phone messages (i did not give me my number, this was like a last resort kind of thing)... nothing from you. The story of my life.

Take care. With love, Ewan

JudeL5 46M
1550 posts
10/29/2005 6:52 pm

Sounds like a lot of fun (if the stress and frustation doesn't get to you)..... sounds even more fun painting with a partner in the nude.... I'll have to try sometime... especially if she has as hot an ass as you do in the picture! Distraction while painting... take a fun break... paint some more... take a fun break...

Work is always more fun if you turn it into a game - Mary Poppins

tigerdickaches 62M

10/29/2005 8:02 pm

From now on we will call you "Frogelangelo"! Funny story! 'Hope let hand and wrist is doing better!

Tiger Dick

pawa75 42M
1 post
10/30/2005 3:31 am

Would`ve given you a hand no problem. Love painting, and painting in the buff well now. Never tried it but sounds great. Looks pretty damn cool too.....

AlbertPrince 58M

10/30/2005 3:51 am

Oh to have been a fly on the wall .... no wait ... I would now be a crispy scented valentine fly?

wickedwench1960 56F

10/30/2005 6:57 am

To avoid multiple coats of paint, and to get a truer match on your walls (and yourself! LO ask the paint store to mix a primer in a similar color...use that will get better coverage/truer color and less coats applied...

rm_Balanon2 49M
193 posts
10/30/2005 2:35 pm

Painting in the nude. Sounds like the service craze just got invented! Get some cute coeds together and watch the guys line up to schedule every room of the house to get painted four times a year Of course, Playboy would have to make a video about it. Make sure you get royalties, Frogger!

And my place could use a paint job including my secluded back porch...

weineroftheworld 66M

10/30/2005 11:51 pm

If ya need any help scrubbin' the paint offen yer ass just holler!!! The 'lil lady and me painted a room nekid once. We tried a special effect. We painted the room a dark taupe. We lay a drop cloth on the floor and poured out some light taupe. I rolled in it to get a good cover. Then leaned against the wall and rolled around the wall. On another drop cloth, the Mrs rolled in pink paint, and she rolled around the wall. We had an absolute blast in the shower!!! How did the 'faux body roll' paint effect work. UGLY as hell. We repainted the next day.

Become a member to create a blog