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For my sisters.....
For my sisters.....
This is to the nice girls who are overlooked, who become friends and nothing more, who spend hours fixating upon their looks and their personalities and their actions because it must be that they are doing something wrong.
This is for the girls who don't give it up on the first date, who don't want to play mind games, who provide a comforting hug and a supportive audience for a story they've heard a thousand times.
This is for the girls who flirt and laugh and worry and obsess over the slightest glance, whisper, touch, because somehow they are able to keep alive that hope that maybe...just maybe this time he'll have understood.
This is a homage to the girls who laugh loud and often, who give more than they should for guys who don't deserve their attention. This is for the girls who have been there from the beginning and have heard the trite words of advice, from "there are plenty of fish in the sea" to "time heals all wounds".
This is to honor those girls who know that the guys are just as scared as they are, who know that they deserve better, who are still seeking to find it.
This is for girls who have never been in love, but know that it's an experience that they don't want to miss out on, and also for those girls that have been in love, and are now missing out on that experience because they regretably let it slip away too fast or still love but aren't loved in return.
For the girls who have spent their weekends sitting on the sidelines of a beer pong tournament, who have received a drunk phone call just before dawn from someone who doesn't care enough to invite them over but is still willing to pass out in their bed.
This is for the girls who have time and time again dropped their male friend hint after hint that they like him alot only to watch him chase after the first slutty girl in a skirt that he sees.
This is for the girls who have been told that they're too good or too smart or too pretty, who have been given compliments as a way of breaking off a relationship, who are told that they deserve better when thats not really the reason. who have never been told they are only wanted as a friend.
This one is for the girls who you can take home to mom, but won't because its easier to sleep with a whore than foster a relationship. This is for the girls who have been led on by words, and kisses, and touches, all of which were either only true for the moment, or never real to begin with.
This is for the girls who have allowed a guy into their head, and heart, and bed, only to discover that he's just not ready, he's just not over her, he's just not looking to be tied down.
This is for the girls who have had their hearts broken by someone time and time again and then realizing that person didn't care in the first place.
This is for the "I really like you, so lets be friends" comment after you read more into a situation than he ever intended.
This is for never realizing that when you choose friends, you seldom choose those which make you cry yourself to sleep.
This is for the hugs you've received from your female friend, for the nights they've reassured you that you are beautiful and intelligent and amazing and loyal and truly worthy of a great guy.
This is for the stupidity of the nights we've believed that something was better than nothing, though his something was nothing we'd have ever wanted.
This is for the girls who have been satisfied with too little and who have learned never to expect anything more.
This is what I don't understand. Guys sit and question and whine that girls are only attracted to the mean guys. They complain that they never meet nice girls, girls who are genuinely interested and compelling, who are intelligent and sweet and smart and beautiful. Guys despair that no good woman want's to share in their lives, that girls play mind games, that girls love to keep them hanging. Maybe the nice guys finish last, but in the race they're running they're chasing after the whores and the sluts and the easy targets. The nice girls are the ones waiting at the finish line hoping that maybe you'll realize that they're the ones that you want in the end. So maybe it won't last forever. Maybe some of those guys will realize that you can't expect everything to be perfect if you just go for the first thing that you see, that there are some very good girls out there but never looked at, not even known to exsist, but you will be surprised that sometimes personality and attitude can be more beautiful than looks itself.
11/17/2005 2:24 am
My experiences don't agree with some of your statements in your last paragraph. I've been told "you're a nice guy but" so many times i now take it as an insult. I've never complained I've don't meet nice, interesting, sweet, smart, inteeligent women. |
A lot of women do play games. When a woman says she doesn't like a guy she does like, plays hard to get because supposedly that's how you get a guy to be interested in you, that's game playing. Guys I know take a comment like that at face value, expecting honesty and says ok see ya later.
Nice guys don't chase whores. Neither men nor women should ever expect any relationship to be perfect. We're human beings we'll never be perfect. Women need to realize that Knights in shining armor always was and always will be a myth. Sorry I probably rambled on ten times more than I should have. You just touched on some issues that bug me.
11/17/2005 3:19 pm
Well, my experiences dont "agree" with some of the statements in your last paragraph. My statements never MENTIONED perfection, nor did it say that a lot of women DON'T play games. But honestly, when they do, they learned it from somewhere and guess where that plce was? Just because you don't complain about it, doesn't make it any different. Many men I know DO complain about it and many men I know DO run from the honesty that myself and many of my friends put forth. I disagree most with your Knights in Shining armor bit. Women don't want to be rescued, but do deserve a Prince Charming. Note, I said charming, not perfect. Those men DO exist, I've seen them. They have tucked a 2 year old baby diva into bed, dried her 4 year old tears, let her 6 year old feet princess dance on top of his as he twirled his queen around the living room. Those princess refuse to settle for borish toads or push over frogs.|
11/19/2005 7:20 am
wery well said foxy!!!!!|
when i read this...i read this is for the girls...if im not mistaken the ones that can really relate...are the women in such a position!!!
the concept that some guys would rather pass up a goood woman for a nonfulfilling/semi-fulfilling time...well that says a lot about them!!! scratch the surface and you see nothing! you see the truth and its not so pretty after all!
i have said before several times that i find it fascinating how some guys read into what i say. we all make assumptions sometimes, but for some...when they express what they really think its almost like a lost cause. its more than confusing, just a shake away from unreal, and most of the time, completly different from what it should be. my point: well i guess i have none really, im just trying to obtain some clarity in such a mixed up society.
I think its the whole whatever i say, im right attitude. its hard to even get someone to see your point. you explain to someone...or anyone in general what you think...and they just casually make it known how closed minded they are.
im all over the place here...thanks for sharing this foxxxy. it was something that i needed to hear!!!
live more, laugh often, love much
11/23/2005 4:07 am
What about us guys who are nuts?
Who love to laugh, make others laugh;
to live, to love, to give, to share.
Who don't care what a woman looks like so long as her smile is warm and genuine.
Who don't care if your big or small.
Who love to hug, touch and share affection.
Some of us just want to give.
It's often difficult when the women we care about or want to care about have been so often hurt by those who don't care, that they don't believe in those who do.
But I say, hey, if that's 'normal' I'm sticking to being nuts.
11/25/2005 8:32 am
notbig...its a sick cycle....women who have been hurt by guys who have been hurt...and the innocent...have no fair play...no heads up, no warning...that they are in for the hurting!!!! its gotta stop somewhere.....|
live more, laugh often, love much
11/26/2005 5:12 pm
Ahhhh...you never cease to amaze me woman We've all been there at one time or another...I've been in every situation you laid out and it sucks...but then there's nothing like ice cream and your girlfriends to keep ya grounded and believing|
For those men who don't believe in knights in shining armor..I won't beg to differ, I'll just tell you that I differ. I found one. He's amazing. He's real. He's worth more than any tear I ever shed over any other man in my life who couldn't or wouldn't step up to the plate. Not because he's perfect but because he tries to be..because he's not scared to be weak..because he's not ashamed to SAY he's not perfect..because he can say he's wrong and he doesn't have to be right...because he 'gets' just what is possible
Sin like you mean it!
12/28/2005 1:45 pm
I am in the same boat as bear. And yes it does seem that nice guys often finish last. But hey, we keep plugging along. Isn't that what we are supposed to do. Yes foxxy, maybe that someone is at the finish line, but it would really be nice to know how damn long I've gotta run. |
By the way, I really enjoyed the reading.