Goodbye, Mr. Doohan. Your time is over.  

five_speed 41M
3250 posts
7/21/2005 5:04 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Goodbye, Mr. Doohan. Your time is over.

James Doohan is dead.

(He played Scotty on Star Trek, in case you were wondering who James Doohan was.)

It was the first thing I read when I woke this morning. I guess it had to happen sometime, but it is still a complete and total motherfucking bummer.

I am annoyed, surprised, and frustrated at how upset I became after I read the news.

I am usually unmoved by death. Usually, in the event of a death or other emergency, the more emotional and frantic people get around me, the colder and more logical I become. I helped dig my grandfather's grave, helped put him in it, and helped bury him when it was done. I felt nothing before, during, or after. Mother said the pain would come later, but it didn't, just as I knew it wouldn't.

But when I read about Doohan - a man I respected as a war veteran and as an actor, but some one I had never met and did not know - I cried. I don't understand why. I didn't even really like Star Trek that much.

Maybe I'm just tired -I never sleep well when the moon is full, or maybe it was just the straw that broke the camel's back - you know how it goes: lots and lots of little things pile up an up. You get so busy looking at them all singly that you don't realize how much shit is piled up in your head, and then one day, one more little thing falls onto the stack, and SNAP!

TxRose, if you're reading, this is going to be the kind of day I was talking about earlier, the kind where I should just turn around and take my ass back to bed, because I can see already that it's really, really going to suck.

I'll write again when I get out of this funk.

rm_mieze626 52F
145 posts
7/21/2005 2:00 pm

i hear ya loud and clear...there r those days, u have anger and frustration build up in yourself and just a little thing can trigger, even a death from somebody u knew but really didn't knew. but i always say and i'm a strong believer in that: where is a downer, the up will be right around the least u r able to let your frustration out, u will feel better after...

five_speed 41M

7/21/2005 7:45 pm

The day is almost over. writing in the afternoon, both for this blog and on my novel, helped my mood tremendously.

DefiniteTrouble 50F

10/19/2005 8:12 pm

You still have trouble sleeping when the moon is full. I'm hoping with the proper cultivation your emotions will grow. Let me be your rain.

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