Who I am (Part II) (Yes, I am obsessive!)  

femmecd 63T
4 posts
7/23/2006 7:46 pm

Last Read:
7/26/2006 7:59 pm

Who I am (Part II) (Yes, I am obsessive!)

Am I submissive?? I wonder ... am I submissive (?), ... or am I simply completely feminine in the "old fashioned" meaning of feminine?? I don't want to be humiliated, unless it is in private with just you and me, OR, ... in the company of others whom you have brought to me. But, then I ask the question ... is it humiliating to be called a "slut"? Is it humiliating to be forced to engage in sexual activity? What exactly is "humiliating"??? I'm not quite sure. When I am with someone I trust and know, ... someone I know has affection for me, ... someone I know would NEVER harm me knowingly and would NEVER do anything that would cause me genuine, true, and deep discomfort ... what could possibly be called "humiliating"??? Treating me like a "whore"??? I don't think so. I WANT to be my lover's whore!! Forcing me to orally pleasure him or her?? I don't think so!!! I will do whatever would bring pleasure to my Master ... my Lover. Drinking his or her piss??? Does it bring him or her pleasure???? Then, ... his or her fluids are treasured and adored!!! How could I possibly feel humiliated by that???

Does it bring pleasure to my Master or Mistress to spank me, ... to express his or her aggressiveness and dominance by slapping my ass??? Does it bring pleasure to my Master or Mistress to see me writhing in ecstasy as He or She whips my body??? If their pleasure and desire is fulfilled by this, how could I find it humiliating??

Om the other hand ... is there a relationship with trust and genuine affection?? Have I learned to trust my partner? ... do I KNOW he or she will NEVER do anything that would truly harm me?? Do I KNOW that my deepest desires and wishes stand alongside his or her deepest desires and wishes, ... that the two NEVER conflict, or, if they do, we will talk about it and move forward with respect and regard for each other ... that we will ALWAYS remember that, regardless of society's "expectations" and "rules", we are both still human beings with emotions, dreams, and wishes ... that we are not simply "freak shows" for the other's pleasure and titilation, ... if all of this is true and real, and my deepest and most treaured desire is to experience his or her approval and fulfillment ... .... it seems to me, ... THIS is what being "a submissive" is truly about ... THIS is how you define "submissiveness".

Whew!!!! I am nearly exhausted!!

Does any of that make sense????



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