fallinStrgazer 54F
470 posts
7/13/2006 9:29 pm

Last Read:
7/18/2006 9:29 pm


Well tonight has been an interesting evening to say the least and I can honestly say right now the way I feel, I could throw my sobriety right out the window!!!! I want a bottle of VODKA so bad, I can taste it!!
When I came back home in May, the people who are closest to me, told me that I needed to find someone close, so I wouldnt move away again.. So at a birthday party in june, I started talking to someone, IF I had known all the shit was gonna fly, I NEVER would have even opened my mouth!!! It seems I have stepped on some toes, even though I asked if anyone would have a problem with this, they all said NO they didnt and NOW the tables have turned.. ON ME..
Now, it has turned into a backstabbing session and this sucks!!! I just cant win It doesnt matter what I do. And the drama and the backstabbing... I DONT NEED IT. These people are my family and I have NEVER done anything to them but for some reason NOW, im the bad person here?...THIS IS BULLSHIT!!!
But for tonight, my sobriety will remain in tact, because this just ISNT worth throwing it all away for. Good night and sweet dreams

digdug41 49M

7/13/2006 10:00 pm

Good for you I has of late have not been holding it down gazer and its about to make things worse for me but its nice to see someone who is holding it down thanks for sharing

roaming the cyber streets of blogland

itsallfun1957 59M

7/13/2006 10:14 pm

It's good that you are talking here, but have you talked with your sponsor? A relapse will just make a bad situation even worse. We all have these urges since it is the only way we have been able to deal with life, but when you jeopardize the sobriety and quite frankly your life you need to rely of the experience, strength , and hope of others to get you through your stuff. Good luck. Call your sponsor, get to the next available meeting, and don't pick up that first drink.>>>itsallfun1957

rm_DarknStar 54F
2823 posts
7/14/2006 7:28 am

In your darkest HOURS in your days and nights. You know whos here for you and you know who aint. But I can promise you one thing....ME & X#2....WILL always to there for you and we LOVE YOU!


DAMN Im glad I dont have a liquor cabinet, in my house. You might have snuck a NIP last night!..........love ya babe

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