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What A Life
What A Life
"Come on Bud, let's get on down to the Blackjack
tables and try our luck" I called through the bathroom door as my friend Bud continued to primp
like some high school girl while I paced the plush hotel room. Impatient! Yeah, that's a fine
word to peg my demeanor and it's probably why I
shot the bank guard earlier today when he didn't move fast enough for my liking.
Bud and I, I being Carmen, robbed the First Bank & Trust of Henderson at 9 a.m. this morning of a
little over $83,000.00 dollars. It wasn't our first rodeo and we'd pretty much worked our way
through banks from Washington State, California,
Arizona, and now Nevada. We skipped Oregon because the snow was so bad it made the get-a-way
too risky and dangerous. Well, we'd rob friggin banks but wouldn't want to chance a wreck on slippery roads. That's stupid, not crazy!
Nope, we weren't terrorist, drug addicts, or anti-goverment fanatics. Nah, we were just lazy,
neither ever liking the 8 hour work day, and so
decided that a few minutes work for usually fairly sizable payoffs was the way to go.
Now, checked into one of the best hotels in Vegas
I was chompin' at the bit to burn off the adrenaline rush of another successful heist. We
hit them hard and fast, never in the bank for
more than minute or so, took no crap from anyone
and had a damn good system for grabbing the most
cash in the least time.
Armed to the teeth with military spec'ed weapons
and ultra-light high-tech body armor we out-gunned, out-maneuvered, and out-ran all pursuit.
On one robbery last May we had four state cruisers on our ass until I leaned out the back-
window of our 'heist'mobile and fired two LAW anti-tank missiles, hitting one car and causing the other three to crash. The ole 68 Caddy was
tricked out with a beefed up suspension, over 530
horsepower, no windows to interfere with possible
fire-fights and some of the finest radio jamming
equipment Japan ever made! It traveled with us in a custom-built trailer pulled by a Kenworth
18-wheeler that was our, Corporate HQ, and kept
hidden well during loading or unloading of the Caddy.
With this latest job complete we'd made $1.6 mil
total for the past 4 months and had decided to lay low for a couple of years up in Vancouver, B.C.. You always heard of guys running for Mexico or Brazil but Vancouver is one of the best
get-lost-in-the-crowd cities in the world and as
long as you obeyed laws and did'nt start taking stupid pills there wasn't much to worry about.
Bud and I had both grew up as country boys and we
knew how to live good without the trappings of the rich hanging off of us like a sign announcing
"these guys got money, no jobs, no rich daddys".
Other than treating ourselves to an above average
hotel after each heist as some form of instant
gradification, we lived our separate lives in
different states on farms out in the middle of
nowhere spending ordinary amounts of money that
didn't draw much attention.
But now we knew it was time to leave those little
farms behind for awhile, if not indefinitely. A
recent developement had encouraged our decision.
A month ago Bud and I met out in San Diego one
night and tracked down the home of one of the SAC
agents, FBI's Special Agents In Charge. We waited
a couple hours and than kidnapped the man from his bed, took him to a remote spot in the desert
and after less than 40 minutes of torture, had all the info that the Feds had on our robberies.
They were getting close, too close, so our minds
were made up to 'retire' quietly for a spell.
Finally, Bud emerged from the bathroom. " Let's
see how crooked the house is Carmen and hit those
As I pulled open the lavishly decorated door I felt an impact on my forehead as if someone had
hit me with a sledge-hammer and I wondered why
Bud had red paint all over his face and then the noise of the shots filled my ears and I was falling face first to the hotel floor. Swarms of
black-clad bodies seemed to materialize out of the hallway carpets and then I could of sworn I heard Bud say to me, "I knew the odds here were
lousy, fuckin' house".
3/8/2006 9:26 pm
We make our own odds don't you think Hun? At least to some extent I|
believe. Good to see you again and I'll be checkin' you out as always! Peace, Bob