Penis Size, Big in Japan, Measure of Pleasure  

earthShiva 59M
270 posts
5/14/2006 10:28 am

Last Read:
5/31/2006 10:56 pm

Penis Size, Big in Japan, Measure of Pleasure

I thought it time to tackle something a little more light-hearted than my first posts. So let’s ponder everyone’s favorite light-hearted subject ‒ penis size!

Let me start off that I think AdultFriendFinder’s rating system is TOTALLY unreasonable. Not because I don’t measure up, but because I just DON’T KNOW! I’m straight! How many erect members do you think there are in my club? Men walk around the locker room stealing furtive glances (making direct eye-penis contact is as taboo as staring down a mother grizzly…, but we still have to guess what they look like hard. AdultFriendFinder is asking straight guys to cross swords with phantoms!

Even asking for inches is problematic. Where do you measure from? The top? The sides? The bottom? How about way back in the perineum (Hey. It’s all erectile tissue. Gives me about 23 inches that way…? When fractions of an inch mean the difference between satisfying some skeptical size queen on paper or not, these details are critical!

If you ask me, it’s a darn shame AdultFriendFinder even chooses to ask this question. I think I’m a little above average, but the truth is I don’t know. I think I’m BIG in Japan, but I don’t know that either. (Actually, maybe I do. A friend of mine who was living in Tokyo brought back a couple boxes of Kimono condoms before they started marketing them in the US. He was working with the company and wanted feedback on them for US product introduction. I still remember the triumphant smirk on my face when I gave my report, “Well Bob, they felt pretty good, but they’re a little small. We, uh, kept breaking them.”

The real reason I think it’s a shame is I think it’s only the right measure of pleasure for some people. They should also ask, “How long can you go?” In fact, I think there should be a new measurement system that takes both factors into account. It would work something like this:
Duration Factor (D) ‒ figure out the number of hours( including fractions) in a 24 hour period that you can stay hard and thrusting. Assume an overall average thrust rate of 15 stroke per minute (Yeah, I know, stroke rate could be a variable, but I decided to makes this a constant for simplicity.
Besides, it might unfairly favor a frenetic, bunny-humping style, which I’ve found sin’t to the taste of many women. So, the D factor is: 15 x 60 * HTH (Hard ‘n Thrusting Hours)

Penis inches (P) - measured from the top (i.e. as close a measurement as possible to the quantity available for insertion.)

The resulting formula would result in a calculation for Fuck Feet per Day (FF/D) as follows”

FF/D=P/12 x (D)

Thus a man with a 5.5 inch penis (Not mine!) and the ability to go for 5 hours, recharge and then go another 3 hours would have an FF/D of 3300, while a man with a 9-incher (sigh! Also not mine… who could go 2 hours, recharge, go another hour, recharge again and go another hour would have an FF/D of 2700. A woman with a reasonably tight box and enough stamina to keep up would actually have more fun with shorty! 600 feet more fun, to be precise.

So ask the right questions and do the math before you make your choices, ladies. There’s a world of pleasure just dying on the vine out there, waiting for you to figure it out!

Respectfully yours,

earthShiva (FF/D of 5365)

The artwork is Aubrey Beardsley's 'Adoration of the Penis'


LilSquirt_4mfm 67M/67F
3394 posts
5/14/2006 11:18 am


lol .... @formula .... well, u didnt bring in the items that make a man turn me on ... like personality, sensuous mind ...... funny, honest ... i'll work on further modifying the formula ..... cause how long can last is a variable affected bi mnau=y things ... and really irrelevant to me .....

great post bi the way .. enjoyed it!!! some good thots, some funny

LilJessicaSQuirt


earthShiva replies on 5/14/2006 11:56 am:
Oh my goodness, Lilsquirt!
I wasn't even attempting to factor in all the dimensions involved in attraction! Some things can't be quantified.

I guess my satirical intent was to raise the idea that penis size isn't even one dimension -- it's only part of a dimension, and needs to be fleshed out more (Nyuk! Nyuk!) before it should be hard-coded as decision factor by the purveyors of this site. Then again, maybe it all reaches equilibrium with the number of dimensions in the person deciding. I'll bet all those nasty size queens who think they don't want me have really tiny blogs! (Not like yours. Yours is sooo big and it gets me hot!)

Petulantly yours,

earthShiva

LilSquirt_4mfm 67M/67F
3394 posts
5/14/2006 9:47 pm

lol .. i did get yer drift outa the gate ..... and was bein sorta satirical in reply ... tongue in cheek like .... hm, i like that expression ....

so glad u liked my BIG blog ...... and not those other lil blogs ... lol.

under all my sillyness, i was agreeing with your title / explanation .... then getting into what did matter ... speaking only for me of course.

keep up the good work!!!


LilSquirt_4mfm 67M/67F
3394 posts
5/14/2006 9:48 pm

lol .. i did get yer drift outa the gate ..... and was bein sorta satirical in reply ... tongue in cheek like .... hm, i like that expression ....

so glad u liked my BIG blog ...... and not those other lil blogs ... lol.

under all my sillyness, i was agreeing with your title / explanation .... then getting into what did matter ... speaking only for me of course.

.. good i checked back, as i dont see any of yer pecker tracks on my blog

keep up the good work!!!


earthShiva replies on 5/15/2006 5:46 am:
Well, I guess I need to get on about servicing your blog, darlin'!

I'll hop right to it, because I'm all about being a good partner.

By the way, is there a minimum word count you need to be satisfied?

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