Mommy Dearest  

duststormdiva 51F
7253 posts
12/19/2005 9:57 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Mommy Dearest

My mother stopped by today. I have not talked to her since my father died. I changed my phone number, but have not told many people, not even her. It could be the reason no one from my family calls me.

It was a good visit, and I am glad I got to see her. I guess I really did miss her.


DustStormDiva



slidein2meplz 62F
1994 posts
12/19/2005 10:47 pm

I'm glad you got to see and talk to your mom.

~~~ Just me, poppin to say HI! ~~


Sorceror07 54M

12/19/2005 10:51 pm

issues amongst family members are best dealt with head on and up front... otherwise it's difficult if not impossible to come to terms with past events/statements/hurts and so forth... take it from one who knows... i found out the hard way too many times.

...That which does not kill me merely pisses me off!...


cozy1957 59M

12/19/2005 11:00 pm

Of course you missed her. Mom's are like that.


duststormdiva 51F
6854 posts
12/19/2005 11:05 pm

slidein2meplz I am too. I will see her tomorrow night too.

DustStormDiva


duststormdiva 51F
6854 posts
12/19/2005 11:12 pm

Sorceror07 this issue I have with my mother is total fault of my own. My inability to forgive her for words that were said after my father died. They were not meant to harm, but they did. She was just inconsiderate with her choice of comments. I have been mad at her since then. I tried not to be, because she is the only parent I have left. I guess I needed someone to direct my anger to for my fathers death. She was available. It's Christmas, and I need to move on. I have but only one parent left, and I need to appreciate the one I have. Thanks for stopping by.

DustStormDiva


rm_willie8one2 70M
573 posts
12/20/2005 5:48 am

One of my sons has not spoken to his mother for 3 years now. They are so much alike and will never admit when they are wrong. That is one of the reasons she is my EX.

I miss my mother as she left us almost 5 years ago. Too bad they don’t have telephones up there to call us.


duststormdiva 51F
6854 posts
12/20/2005 6:16 am

cozy1957 I suppose I did.

DustStormDiva


AmberSolaire 42M

12/20/2005 11:50 am

Merry Christmas

Amber


duststormdiva 51F
6854 posts
12/20/2005 5:06 pm

willie8one2 I am sorry for the loss of your mother. I sure hope that your son and his mother are speaking again. Happy Holidays.

DustStormDiva


duststormdiva 51F
6854 posts
12/20/2005 5:07 pm

ReticentDevil I just called my mother and invited her to go to my daughters choir concert. She seemed excited to go. I can't wait to see her.

DustStormDiva


duststormdiva 51F
6854 posts
12/20/2005 5:08 pm

AmberSolaire Merry Christmas to you too!

DustStormDiva


KC_JJ 54M

12/20/2005 10:53 pm

Similar thing happened when my mom kicked the proverbial bucket in 2000.

It took a long time for my dad and I to see eye to eye. It took a lot of effort on both of our parts.

One thing that became clear to me though was that my dad had never ever experienceed real romatic hetartbreak before this. I had long suspected he was a virgin when he married my mom but I finally confirmed that suspicion.

So as it turns out I was far more of a broken heart veteran than him!!!

I've learned tons about my dad since them that I'd proabably have learned no other way and we have a good relationship now but it was really nasty right when she died. It was downright Oedipal in the mythic sense.

I'm so happy that we got through it though.

Sounds like you've at least broken the ice now.

Advice: stand your own ground but do NOT hold ANY grudges _whatsoever_. Grudges don't do anything but get in the way of the necessary healing that needs to take place. They simply waste valuable time and are not really constructive for ANYTHING.

Hope that advice is relevant and makes sense,

KC_JJ

MMM [ MMM


KC_JJ 54M

12/21/2005 3:49 am

Hey DSS!,

Is your mom a dead ringer for Faye Dunaway?

And sorry to derail this thread but..

And long ago you said...

Take the purity test. I think it determined that I am 43% pure. LOL

I just took it got 33%. So what is considered a good score for this?

MMM [ MMM


duststormdiva 51F
6854 posts
12/21/2005 4:17 pm

KC_JJ I'd share the experiences I have had the past couple of days about learning not to hold grudges, but not sure if I am ready to do that. Things with my mother are good now. I had a good visit and she is coming back after the first of the year.

DustStormDiva


duststormdiva 51F
6854 posts
12/21/2005 4:21 pm

KC_JJ Faye Dunaway? Hmmmm back in her younger days, I am sure that my mother resembled Faye Dunaway in some way, but not as she has aged. I searched for pics of an older Faye, and didn't find any resemblance to my mother?

If you are 33% pure, you and I need to meet SOON!!! I can learn a few more ways of being naughty!

DustStormDiva


duststormdiva 51F
6854 posts
12/21/2005 4:25 pm

BigGirlzRSweet I don't know if my mother ever knew that I was hurt by her words. I didn't say anything at the time, because I know I would have said some intentional hurting words, some that may never been forgiven. So, no, she has not apologized.

My father always said, "love means never having to say your sorry." He never apologized for much of anything, but as he got older he began to apologize more.

DustStormDiva


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