His Children  

duststormdiva 51F
7253 posts
7/19/2006 6:32 am

Last Read:
7/22/2006 2:41 pm

His Children


When my boyfriend and I started seeing each other, I never expected him to leave the only life he knew for 16 years... his wife, his kids, his home. As our relationship grew I learned that he was very unhappy with his wife. He and I fell deeply in love with each other. I learned about his children and how great they were.

The divorce should have been final in April, but was not final until recently. I have been looking forward to meeting his kids for the past three months.

I am a high school teacher and teach some middle school classes. THere is not a kid in that age group that I don't have a great rapport with. I was not concerned about meeting his children. I knew I'd get along with them. Until... my mind got the best of me yesterday. I'll explain after a brief explanation of what happened when MY children met him.

My kids have not met anyone I dated since summer of 2000. Reason being is the man they met then, they fell in love with and wanted him to be their "new daddy". He fell in love with me, but I didn't fall in love with him. We had a great time together, laughed, joked, and even the sex was mediocre. The feelings were not there for him, and soon it ended. My children were hurt. I didn't want to see that happen again, so I never introduced my kids to another man I dated.

I was totally honest with my children about him, because I knew he was the "one". They knew he was married. My son was cool with it, after all he knew that I had been dating married men for sometime and he knew the reason why. My youngest was cool with it, but she resisted when I wanted to go see him. Mainly, she acted this way because she is somewhat of a follower and her sister was persistant that I don't meet him because of his marriage.

I warned him that she was going to ask him questions. And did she ever ask him questions. "Why are you dating my mom if you are married?" That was the most important question and he very carefully answered it. He answered her question, but the most important thing is he didn't treat her like a child when she decided she was going to drill him with interrogating questions. He eventually won her heart. I knew he would, after all he won my heart and I didn't think it could be done.

So, yesterday I wondered if his kids would interrogate me and I began to get a little scared to meet them. Would I answer their questions as eloquently as he did my daughters? What if they asked, "Why were you seeing my father while he was still married to my mom?" "Why did you tear our house apart and take our dad away?" I admit a bit of panic set in.

During his lunch break, I talked to him on the phone and asked him if he thought I was going to be drilled with questions. He didn't think I was going to be. I trust him more than I have ever trusted anyone so I let it rest.

He went to pick up his boys and my daughters and I met them at the restraunt. Immediately they said hello and they introduced themselves. The line was long to be seated so it gave us time to chit chat. I was very surprised that the oldest was as talkative as he was. I thought he was the quiet one. His dad was surprised too. The youngest was chatty. We were in line for about an hour, we could have gone elsewhere, but damn the deal to feed six people was incredible, so we stuck it out.

Finally, we were seated, and we scattered like mice whose nest had been disturbed to fill our plates with the buffet foods. We laughed and talked for the next two hours. His kids got along with my kids, and vice versa. His kids definitely have personality. I like that.

I really like his children.

DustStormDiva



duststormdiva 51F
6854 posts
7/19/2006 9:26 pm

    Quoting fun1968xxx:
    Sweet, very sweet! I think kids pick up on vibes. If they get a good vibe from their dad, if he talks about you fondly, if he is happy when he talks about you, all that stuff sets up a positive vibe!

    Enjoy life!
Oh believe me I do enjoy life. I enjoy it to it's fullest.

DustStormDiva


duststormdiva 51F
6854 posts
7/20/2006 6:53 am

    Quoting allowmesatisfyu:
    I'm very happy for you. It sounds like your man was able to talk to his children and inform them of the situation between he and their mother so that they understood. And obviously they trust and love him so the good words he put in for you were taken just that way, good. I hope that all continues like this for all of you.
I don't know if there was much talk about me with them. They never asked. Once he asked them what they thought of him having a girlfriend and the most reaction he got was, "I don't want a step mom."

They did know for nearly 24 hours that we all were going to dine together.

It was a great experience. I know they were watching us and I hope they saw how happy we make each other. Kids DO notice things like that.

DustStormDiva


duststormdiva 51F
6854 posts
7/20/2006 6:54 am

    Quoting rm_mzhunyhole:
    Thats fabulous..just great..I just knew it would all be good.
You are such a great supporter. Thanks for all your encouraging words, on this blog and yours. Make it a great day Huny.

DustStormDiva


MillsShipsGayly 51M

7/21/2006 5:45 am

YEAAAAAAAAH !


duststormdiva 51F
6854 posts
7/21/2006 6:59 am

My thoughts exactly!

DustStormDiva


redswallow777 48M
6810 posts
7/22/2006 12:05 pm

I am impressed by the way both of you have handled this. Not having had any children myself, I always feel a bit uncomfortable trying to make conversation with them. Somehow I need to add more contact with children to my life in the coming years. I would hope I have something to offer the next generation.

Good work!


duststormdiva 51F
6854 posts
7/22/2006 2:41 pm

    Quoting redswallow777:
    I am impressed by the way both of you have handled this. Not having had any children myself, I always feel a bit uncomfortable trying to make conversation with them. Somehow I need to add more contact with children to my life in the coming years. I would hope I have something to offer the next generation.

    Good work!
The children are our future. I hope they can be touched by someone. Some people fear that the kids these days are going to ruin society as we know it when they become adults.

DustStormDiva


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