FFM vs. MMF....  

dinklepup 37F
18 posts
1/6/2006 2:54 am

Last Read:
3/19/2006 12:52 am

FFM vs. MMF....

.Do u think its right if he justs want a FFM? And will not try a MMF? Why is it that staright men can have 2 females the wife is cool about it. but when it comes to the female she wants to try MMF and he is like hell no!! No matter how long and prepared you try to get him the answer is still no..I recently just talk to my husband about what he thought about the strapon and using it. His answer was no. It's cool with me I would not want to see my husband with a fake dick on. No offense to anyone who likes that. Now with a woman, heck yeah that would be cool, with only me.. So thats why I think about the starpon and what do u think about the MMF? and FFM deal? Fair or unfair? One more thing is, Our sex life needs a BIG spunk in it, so I have been wanting FFM and he is cool with it> No problem at all....But I cant get it out of my mind that the only time we had FFM it seemed like he was sooooo into the other woman more then me, Its like I saw it and can't get it out of my mind..Hmmm??I don't know how to feel about it? I hope I dont feel the same way?? He swears he was never into that woman. He won't even let me go have a drink with a female and bring her home. Hes cool about ant woman joining us, but when it comes to me meeeing her first, he says no. Is it insecurity on his part? What the heck?? I can't get a compromise staright with him?? But our sex life needs something different.. I love him with all my heart and he loved me as well..We are both very good to each other but............what do you think about this situation and how would you handle it?

THEsmiley41 55M
38 posts
1/6/2006 3:18 am

I think there is no way for me to answer why your hubby doesn't want the MMF thing, most men have fantasies about FFM, so he is one of the lucky ones that he has done it, and has a wife that is open to a repeat.
If I were to guess about some of the things you raised as questions, I think that your man wants to choose the woman - probably because he wants to find her attractive and maybe wants the control. Personally I would really get turned on thinking about my wife bringing up the subject of FFM with another woman and them planning it - totally hot.
But him appearing to be into the other woman is probably just him taking advantage of the variety in the situation, he is saying he wasn't in to her - but her must have fancied her. I think that is to be expected.
For the MMF thing maybe he doesn't want to share you, I don't know.

I'm not sure that's a lot of help to you, but I will be happy to tell you what I think if you want.
take care - smiley

rm_txcpl4f 43M/34F
2 posts
1/6/2006 3:32 am

well we say he is insecure!!! first if he dont want you to meet a woman and bring her home he is worried she is better than he is known fact about a man second if he dont wanna mmf he is worried the other guy is better than he is known fact and last of all if you truly love each other then there should be a 50\50 relationship when it comes to sexual fun we have had our fair share of mmf and ffm and now seek cpls for some real fun. And on how to handle it well if it was us there would have to be a compromise or some ones gettin cut off either that or both of you need to reevaluate yalls relationship because there really seems to be a trust issue for the simple fact if you really and truely love each other you niether one should be worried about the other one leaving to go to the new partner yall have join because if you trust him enough to share him with another woman then he should trust you to share you with another man

Dave80598 54M
26 posts
1/6/2006 4:06 am

It sounds like he may somewhat insecure about himself. That and you are a very pretty girl, he might be concernced about losing you to a woman even. There's always the possibility that he may not trust you either. Instead of out picking up a girl, are you trying to pick up another man? Either way, it's not fair on his part from my viewpoint. It should go both ways. Some people are homophobic. Myself, I loved both versions. Just be patient with him though. The fact of not getting into this other woman...well I'm sur ehe did, more than you. It's something new and exciting. This is something YOU have to be prepared for. It will happen each time. Good luck in your adventures.

Cainseviltwin 36M

1/6/2006 6:20 am

welcome to blogland dinklepup!

Your situation sends off some warning signals, to me. You know best, since you're directly involved, but it sounds like your man is consistently only doing what he wants to do, and doesn't seem willing to try what you want to do. That is something to bring up and try to clearly communicate about. Does he know how you felt about the previous FFM? That is going to be important for him to know, so that he can avoid making you feel ignored or left behind in a future encounter. As a possible solution, what if you try to swing with another couple? Maybe it would be a good way to ease him into the idea of another man being in the bedroom, since there would still be two women.

steven05352000 65M

1/6/2006 7:32 am

I have to agree it sounds as if he is insecure, but more then insecure about loosing you. Some men are insecure about being close to or being touched by another man in an intimate way. I guess they are afraid of being gay. It's just another social stigmatism. Women may be with women and it's erotic but men can’t be with men. Well dam it I say that's just not right. Some societies in the past have encouraged male to male relations but in present day western societies they seem to be taboo. In my opinion much to our loss. I have found that the mail to male sexual encounters I have had just as satisfying as the female to male ones. And I don't feel any less the man for having them in fact I now feel more complete for having had a same sex relationship. I just hope that sometime he at least give the mmf thing a try it may just be the spark your both looking for.

rm_ohsolustful 58M
859 posts
1/6/2006 10:15 am

I agree with most of the responses, He is just too insecure for it all, hold out on another ffm until he gives you the mmw you so desire...it's only fair.....Good luck finding that missing spark in your sex life...............

wannahavefun_X 38M
2 posts
1/6/2006 10:41 am

hi miss dinklepup,
from what i read, it seems like that he owns you and only wants things to go his way. it's a form of insecurity but most straight men prefer FFM cause i bet it's on every straight men fantasy, as for MMF, well unless the guy is bi, it's not gonna happen. It is only natural that your hubby was into more to that other women, that because he's expriencing something new and excited by it, i'm sure he loves you and all, but he's had and familiar with you, and the prospect of fucking other women without guilt really overwhelmed him. If you feel jealous just don't do 3some, it's just going to hurt you. Hope this helps, feel free if you want to email or chat with me.

whichamafart 47M
1 post
1/16/2006 7:45 am

He is scared that you will like the other woman more than him. Then you will want to be come a lesbian and fuck other women and not him. Same goes for other men. I wouldn't want my wife fucking another man, even if I was joined in too! See if you can get him to give you anal sex, with toys, then his cock! Then have a FFM and have her strap-on and double penitrate you, then DP her, having him and her switch between your pussy and ass, so you can cum many times. Also tell him that what you really want is while your being fucked and so horny, is that you want to suck a cock, preferbly his! Thats why you want her to use a strap-on. You should agree to have sex with another woman, only as a 3 way, never 1 on 1 alone and that you must meet her and decide on her together. I wish my wife would enjoy a FFM. I make her orgasm almost evry time, but she wants to cum every time. I don't blame her. She says that she wants it to be exciting. She wants to do anal, but gets scared. She likes small to med toys in her while I fuck her pussy. I think she would love me fucking her ass while she has a woman eat her pussy or she eat a pussy or suck my cock while a woman fucks her pussy and or ass!

rm_FlickieMatt 39M

1/17/2006 2:44 am

Thats such a hard situation to put into black and white really. FOr instance. I as a single man actually really enjoy the idea of a MMF three way. I understand that its not the norm and I'm not looking to steal anyone away, but the thought of having you and your husband share that with me is a very big turn on.
I am a straight man, and while I can see his point about the strap-on, there could be a number of reasons that he is insisting upon FFM and that he meets first.
I don't completely buy into the 'he is afraid to lose you' idea just based on the fact that those that are like usually choose to not have any random play at all. Moreso I believe, he is living a fantasy through this idea of a FFM. He wants it to be molded to his idea of how it will work.
What if he is picturing a red-head and you bring home a brunette, or he is thinking about someone in glasses and a school girl outfit and you bring home someone in a T-shirt and jeans?
My advice to you would be this, and it may not be the most popular choice, but it sounds to me as if you two really arent ready for this step in your relationship. You have to find some sort of comprimise that you two are comfortable with, I can only see one of you bending so far to the others idea that is causes a rift or more of dictatorship in the bedroom.

rm_FreeLove999 46F
16127 posts
1/27/2006 5:08 am

you sound really confused and swayed this way and that by whatever your husband says ... how about instead of just letting him dictate the terms, you set your own conditions that he must comply with if he wants things to go ahead ... why are you letting him set the whole agenda? of course, to get along in life you sometimes have to compromise, but you should also be stating your wants and needs and he should be open to that.

[blog freelove999]

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