my first blog  

dayvudolfin 45M/45F
10 posts
2/20/2006 8:36 pm

Last Read:
6/27/2007 1:23 pm

my first blog

never did a blog before but maybe through this blog i can ask a question. my wife and i are curious of swinging so i wanted to know from other couples what are the benefits and what are the downfall. what are the ok's and what are the no no's all input is greatly appreacited.

sassybelle21 32F
13313 posts
2/20/2006 11:01 pm

Have fun blogging and I hope you can get some feedbacks from swinging couples


3/2/2006 2:38 pm

Hi there!
My husband and I are a full swing couple. We've been in the lifestyle for about 2 years. #1 most important thing is to talk to your significant other and make sure you have all the boundaries worked out prior to jumping in with both feet. Work out as many scenerios as possible. I can tell you out of our experience, our sex life was enhanced dramatically, we became much closer and have been able to talk about anything and everything. We have a great time with anything we do. The downfalls would be "jealousy." Unfortunately, just about everyone that steps into this life, experiences some kind of jealousy at some point. Try to keep that in mind, talk about it and make sure you talk about everything that's bothering you even if it's embarrassing or may hurt your pride. We've seen a few different couples, who seem to be very much in love, split up because they just didn't talk about whatever was bothering them. Make sure to respect your partner's feelings. If she/he doesn't want to play or if they are uncomfortable with anything, make sure to stop, don't take it too far or you may have some problems later. ALWAYS REMEMBER, you love your partner and they are the most important in this mix. Enjoy yourself!! Life is good!!

dayvudolfin 45M/45F
6 posts
5/23/2006 7:54 am

thanks tara it took me awhile to get back to this blog ,i wish i had sooner, as what you wrote seeped in and makes total absolute sense, and we have talked about many senerios like you suggested and it is helping us to definatly decide to try the lifestyle. thanks.

CadillacPussyHD 53M/54F

7/8/2006 11:55 am

Hmmmm Well, the advantages are obvious... things become hotter between the couple in most cases! The downfalls are, the times when a couple is not desirable for whatever reason, generally just no "chemistry" between you and them... it is awkward when they want to hook up and you do not. We hate to hurt feelings, but sometimes when honesty is the best policy, the truth hurts even if it is heartfelt and not meant in a bad way. We always try to be tactful, but rejection in any form is hard to take. You have to realize that there will be times like this and be prepared to deal with that, and you can't get "butthurt" if another couple does not want to be with you also... it would drive you crazy! Live & let live & go with the flow. Some people will be PUSSSHHHY and that sucks too. THEN you have to be a bit more direct in your NO to them because they simply do not "get it", otherwise.
There will be times when one of the people in the other couple is hot enough and you want them bad enough that you will "take one for the team" so to speak, just to be with the hottie... now, saying that, I mean that the other one is not all that bad, just not really all that great. In our case we have done this because the female was hot... It turned out to be great, and well worth it, and it turned out that the guy was not bad either in all but one case.
Lastly, you BOTH have to be into this whole thing. We have seen, all too many times, situations where one or the other wants to do this and the other one really is not into it. (usually the male is pushing the female into it and she is "obliging"...) If you are both not 100% sure this is what yo want, & are both into it, it will destroy you. We wish you all the best. If you're both into this, it will make your relationship HOT.
M & B

CadillacPussyHD 53M/54F

7/8/2006 12:00 pm

Jealousy is another factor... One or the other might think that the other seemed to enjoy the one they were with more than they enjoyed sex with them, or if there are self esteem issues, it can seriously be a problem.... and Tara is correct on identifying the boundaries ahead of time. Know the possible scenarios and how you would deal with them (both agreeing) if they were to arise. Sometimes thing will happen that you never thought of... if the two of you are on the same wavelength it will be dealt with and work its self out. If not, you may have a little argument later, learn from it and have great make up sex and move forward!
Best to you once more,
M & B

dayvudolfin 45M/45F
6 posts
9/25/2006 12:00 pm

thanks cadillac your input is greatly appreciated. and no worry on the jealousy thing we passed that at least ten years ago. and its a decision we both have discussed ,neither is pushing for the other into it. excatly as you stated if it were like that , it would only cause problems and worse. this is something we have been talking about for well over a year, but never knew how to go about doing such a thing , or meet others interested in the lifestyle. until we heard of this site. So here we are . from here well who knows but when we do we will tell all of our friends on here , who knows it probably will be a friend from here that eventually get to break us in ...... thanks again for the input. hope to talk again soon.

SirMounts 102M

9/30/2006 5:51 pm

Welcome to blogging, dayvudolfin. *smiling*

rm_ready7nm 53M

11/14/2006 1:03 am

The boundaries are quite important, not just knowing what they are, but why they are. For instance, I get very turned on by seing my wife take on another man, whether taking him in her mouth or her pussy, but I do not want her to share her ass. There are reasons for this, which are mine, and she understands, and knows why I feel the way I do about this particular matter. It isn't enough to just say, "You can do this, but not that". Understanding is key, much more than agreement, IMO.

As yet, jealousy hasn't really entered into our relationship, but that is more likey because of our arrangement than the fact that it 'can't happen to us'. As NDULGME said, make sure to talk about it before it turns from something that can be dealt with to something that can't. There's a reason that many people aren't able to continue with what they started, because they didn't work out the feelings that can be quite natural, even as much as they enjoy what they are doing.

hansome617 41M
17 posts
11/15/2006 12:44 pm

Hello ,

Consider myself, I would love to participate


Become a member to create a blog