Ironic Melodies  

dasher121 36M
3656 posts
3/28/2006 7:24 am

Last Read:
3/31/2006 12:43 pm

Ironic Melodies

Some time back I wrote a post titled Looking back, one last time. This was about "the ex". We all have "the ex", the one relationship that was long lasting, made an impact, and ended not quite how we would have liked it to.

I wrote that post in response to my own mind wandering, to all of the shit and baggage that I couldn't let go. I hadn't seen her in quite some time and then WHAMO there she was across the road from me. But from what the post talks about, I let go finally.

Finally made my peace with my past and her and let it go. Which is something that we all must do eventually with anything that impacts us strongly and in negative ways.

So, not too long ago I find out that she is getting married. I smiled when I first heard the news. I'm happy for her. In that post I talked about her last words to me, they were not very pleasant. And they were definitely cords that echoed in my mind for a long time.

And now, with the news of her getting hitched, I find myself reminiscing yet again. Thinking of fun and happy times. Kicking around the "what have yous" and "what ifs" I know that they are long gone and I have very much moved on, same with the bride to be. But still, I find my mind wandering.

I guess that this sort of thing echo's in not just my mind, but maybe in a lot of others as well. Past regrets, good times, and the inevitable end of it all. Those Ironic Melodies that beat and echo through the mind, cause reverberations that awaken memories best left forgotten. And I do not mean negative ones. Nope, the good memories are the worst ones to relive over and over in your mind.

Those are the ones that resonate, those are the ones that make you smile and then make you frown deeply.

So I am revisiting an old post here, join with me if you would like.

Looking back, one last time.

The Dude.

curious082385 31F
4925 posts
3/28/2006 9:21 am

Yes, the good ones are always the ones that spin around and around in your head. The ones that can send you into hours of just sitting there and wondering. Strange what timing they seem to have too.

rm_goddess1946 105F
13518 posts
3/28/2006 9:46 am

embrace yesterday...learn from it and be thankful you were there.

embrace tomorrow...plan for it and be thankful that you can.

embrace thankful for it and know that in the big picture...the power is here and now is all that there really, that is.

hugs to you dude...going now to read your memories having been
part of bringing you to today...kiss.

Just a little food for thought.............
If you really want to be happy, nobody can stop you...

rm_AnOddGirl 57F
3469 posts
3/28/2006 10:08 am

Dash, baby, the idea is to find someone who will treat you as good as you treat them. I read your post "Looking Back..." and it seemed very one sided, even with your positive comments about her.
But such is life, we learn, growing pains in more ways than one, it shapes who/what we are. Your a better person because of this relationship and others, past, present and future.

There will always be the questions: Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda.

The hardest part, acceptance and moving on.

Dayum, I'm thinking I'm glad I've got a few years on me, know myself better, and learned stuff, so I don't have to repeat the 'relationship dance" without music again.


pet_humility 48F

3/28/2006 10:40 am

the good memories are the worst ones to relive over and over in your mind.

Your absolutely right. I never ever thought of
I mean yes we think about the good times and thats what makes us
not want to let go.. But for someone to point it out like you did, makes you stop and think.. sheesh stop doing that

jadedbabe78 105F

3/28/2006 12:34 pm

It's amazing what memories will do to us. I always think back and play 'what if' in my head on numerous things.

At times, I accept it. Then there are the times, it just depresses the hell out of me.

But you know what? You move on and embrace the NOW. Because that is what matters. And you look toward the future. Because that is what will matter. The past is the past and should be left as such.


carebearluv2 41F

3/28/2006 6:20 pm

Dash, the truth in this post is very deep for me. I struggle with letting "him" go and have written a few posts about it. It's been four years and I still can't seem to put him behind me. A song will come on the radio, a memory will flash or someone will remind me of him. It is haunting for me. I've tried to let him go and I am not sure I ever will. I don't know if he is married yet, but I know things were heading in that direction with a girl. I think if I knew, it would be worse for me. I am glad to hear you are able to find the ability to let go and wish her the best.

Thanks for letting me know I am not alone in this battle.

rm_art_persists 51M
1789 posts
3/28/2006 7:37 pm

I'm learning from the past while embracing the future...

ArgosPlumyKooky 45F
3902 posts
3/28/2006 7:42 pm

repeat as necessary there's a reason i left, even if the good memories are good, there's a reason i left.

Vick_Demise 44M
2431 posts
3/29/2006 8:00 am

My buddy Skyking told me that though he gets choked up sometimes and wants to give in, "remember why you left," I think he said something like, "never forget the smell, always remember the shit"

Sorry you're hurting in this regard though, alot of us are and the ones that just give up and give in are settting themselves up for hurt. If that's not really an option of you two getting back on, then it'll pass for you, like me, you just need a few more victories under your belt

You can shine your shoes and wear a suit
You can comb your hair and look quite cute
You can hide your face behind a smile
One thing you can't hide
Is when you're crippled inside

StillSmokin2oo6 44M/43F

3/29/2006 10:11 am

Not to change the subject,but,,Damn,, we didn't know you were from Pa,,,we should set up a Pa bloggers meet!!! Great Pennsylvania bloggers smoke out anyone??? LoL Sorry,, we couldn't resist!!!

digdug41 49M

3/29/2006 10:43 am

dasher someone once told me its ok to look back but don't stare and i understand that and I do,although lately I have been thinking of an affair I had with this woman who took my breath away and she had such an impact on me, she too recently married and I have seen her, we have talked and everytime I stare into the blue of her eyes I am mesmerized. I still miss her alot, but I know it would not be the same, because we have gone on and we both have changed and yes those good memories are the ones that hurt the most but I just keep it moving coz life dont allow you to stop

roaming the cyber streets of blogland

rm_corezon 53F
3376 posts
3/29/2006 10:52 am

eventually woulda, coulda, shoulda fades if you do your inner work and strive to grow it all eventually blends into one and the person that you were becoming all the while

would you believe 7 years is about average for me to get there where I can look back and all I see is beauty, no angst left anymore? but I'm more careful about exposing myself to the fall because those 7 years are so much work

libgemOH 56M/52F

3/29/2006 11:14 am

Regrets can bury us in their poison. For me and the one that made the impact on me, I have been able to look at the relationship, good and bad and remember what it is I loved so much about him and what was so bad about he and I. It didn't end the way I wanted it to, but it ended the way it had to and because it had to. He taught me through his example, a lot of the things I really want in my life as well as a lot of the things that I DO NOT want. I keep those lessons sacred and use them often!

Reminisce, but go forward! -B

dasher121 36M

3/29/2006 11:17 am

Thanks for all of your insight on this one peeps. And believe me, I was in no way really down in the dumps over this. Just one of those moments of clarity if you will. And def dont miss the relationship and would not change the outcome of it either. Everything happens for a reason and each life event is just another piece to a greater puzzle.

Thanks to you all You know, I typed up two new posts for today that have not come up yet. *shaking my head* where is El Bandeeto when you need him lol.

The Dude.

Become a member to create a blog