MOVE Bitch! Get Out the Way!  

cuteNEway 41F
1774 posts
6/20/2006 7:48 pm

Last Read:
10/4/2006 2:54 pm

MOVE Bitch! Get Out the Way!

I love New York. I love working in the city. I love how busy the city is all the time. There's another reason I love my location but I will keep that tidbit between myself and an unmentioned party for now The location I speak of is Times Square.

OK now before you tell me how cool it is to work in that area, allow me to explain. I think its cool too. Stores, theatres and theme restaurants, all of these wonderful attractions are what make this area one if not THE busiest part of the city. On any given week, just commuting to and from work, I see more people than I saw the entire seven months I lived in a small town in Texas. Most of the people I see are tourists.

They're happy and excited to be in NY. Wearing NY t-shirts and hats of various themes. Carrying bags from the tourist trap franchise stores. Taking tours and taking pictures. Taking pictures. Now being an amateur photogapher I fully understand the need to pull out your camera to take a picture of whatever random subject caught your eye. But when I am going to stop walking to take a picture, I look behind me to make sure no one is gonna collide with me.

In fact no matter what I'm stopping for I look behind me! Every day on my way to and from work and when I go out to get my lunch, I have to battle a sea of tourists snapping photos and stopping to look up and gawk at the buildings and the humungoid billboards, which I also fully understand. This city is magnificent!!

Not only that (oh no, of COURSE not), there are also the guys hawking tours of the city, the guys selling tickets to the comedy shows, the people with the big 5 gallon empty water jugs telling you that a penny from you will feed the homeless, people contracted to hand out flyers for the attractions, marketers with free samples of new products, restaurant employees proffering their menus in front of their establishments and of course the guys that set up tables full of designer knockoffs.

I won't even mention the theatre crowds. Especially on Wednesdays when all tickets are half off.

GRR...AARRGH! All of this takes up most of the walking space. I feel like I'm in some sort of video game where I have to dodge the life sucking forces of smiling evil. Dodging all these people has made me late for work a couple of times by a couple of minutes. The Times Square Alliance people need to get a system going where during certain hours there are designated lanes.

Lane 1
Locals Only! Must Show Proof of Residence To Pass At All Times. Also known as the "This is MY territory" lane.
Lane 2
Commuters. Must Show NY/NJ/CT State ID and Work ID To Pass. 7am - 7pm. The reassuring lane where you know that your progress will not be hindered by tourist activities.
Lane 3
Photographers. A lane where you may just stop for pictures. No pesky locals, commuters or gawkers bumping into you! All Times.
Lane 4
Street Personnel. This is a lane that will make everyone in every other lane happy. I don't know about you but I am not happy when some eager beaver street employee blocks my path to make their pitches. This is a very narrow lane between the photo lane and the gawking lane (for obvious reasons).
Lane 5
Gawkers. This lane would be strictly for those who are in awe of the city's grandeur and do not wish to be cursed out by locals and commuters.

If you're a New Yorker living or working in a tourist area you know what I mean. If you're not a New Yorker and plan on visiting New York, PLEASE keep all of this in mind. It will make your stay with us more pleasant for all of us!


tee hee


AtomicArtist0 45M
6015 posts
6/20/2006 10:59 pm

new york is a fabulous city. I've spent a lot of time in Times Square both before and after Juliani cleaned it up. You're lucky to be there. Now come take a tour of laid back Seattle. We're the most literate city, you know.


MissAnnThrope 56F
11488 posts
6/21/2006 4:39 pm

Could we put lane 5 in the middle of Broadway, please?

I actually flew into a Pedestrian Rage over the winter. From trying to get one fucking block up the street to the subway. I know I could have taken the 41st St entrance, but then I would have had to have walked forever underground to get to the Q train. I hate those tunnels.


NickRules999 39M
9462 posts
6/21/2006 5:42 pm

I have yet to go to New York. I know my brother took a trip there.

Come into my realm! You aren't afraid...are you?


pendus78 38M

6/22/2006 5:56 am

Where do I sign? Sounds like great petition to get started, and MissAnnThrope is right to suggest lane#5's placement in the middle of Broadway so that the gawkers can be at the mercy of oncoming traffice! Sounds like a proposal which Juliani would have backed, but the new city hall has neither the balls nor the money (allegedly) for such a measure. Cuty, should we put on on the ballot for the next one?


shylena256 42F
1967 posts
6/23/2006 2:23 am

I work with tourists. (Yes it's me who brings those groups of ignorant gawkers not just to NYC)
I can't tell you how often I try to get them to respect the locals...sometimes it *does* work. But not everyone cares.
I just happen to hate getting stuck behind inconsiderate groups of gawkers amnd do try to train my people on day one.
I am heading back out on the road again and will be thinking about this as I lead a group of 25 through the world


cuteNEway 41F

6/23/2006 5:34 am

spunky...they're everywhere aren't they?!?!?
Atomic...Most Literate? ooohh exciting!
Dys... I catch ya gawkin without lookin back...yer on yer own
MissAnn...I'd put lanes 3 and 4 there too but I get photographers and lane 4 are just poor grunts trying to make a living like me, annoying as they may be, so I'll just confine them
Nick...Did your brother like it out here?
Pendus...I'm in the process of drawing up the petition now (tee hee)
Shylena...Your efforts are VERY much appreciated!


keithcancook 60M
17718 posts
6/23/2006 7:34 pm

Yep, you're a Yankee now alright...

Blog On!


Become a member to create a blog