Getting into My Neighbors Pants  

rm_cru1972 44M
3520 posts
6/22/2006 3:26 pm

Last Read:
2/21/2010 2:39 pm

Getting into My Neighbors Pants

in my best Fire Marshal Bill voice LEt ME TELL YA SOMETHIN
Let me tell ya bout MY day if you don’t laff at this there is NO hope for any of ya). Ok my day starts at 3:20 everyday, but due to the heat yesterday and the beat feelings I did not hear the alarm until 6 after four

My neighbor who lives kitty corner from me is my ride for work. He leaves at 4:20. So I leave at the same time Well this morning on our way we talked the normal half asleep talk trying to keep each other awake, when I say WTH he looks at me and "I say I must have been spaced out the whole time cause the last place I remember is about 30 miles back." OOOOOkay now, by this time I have determined what my day is gonna be like LOL not worth a crap.

Now it gets good "Son of a bitch"I say. My neighbor looks at me and says NOW WHAT I say Shit I don’t have any clothes. YES people I said Clothes. Now no I had shorts and a tee-shirt on. I mean I don’t have any WORK clothes. Well now I can’t work in a welding shop with shorts and a tee-shirt. I can’t even fathom how to describe the shade of RED I would be. So my neighbor asks me "so what ya gonna do?" I say I spose I’ll take a day off and walk back home. Not much other option for me LOL

Now comes the best statement I have ever heard, AND I QUOTE my neighbor say“ I could let you wear the pants I was gonna wear home tonight” Hey that could just work then I won’t have to miss a day of work (which we get wrote up for) and I don’t have to walk home !!! All is good in the world right? NOT

Now let me start by describing me, I am 5’ 9” I weigh approx 220 (anywhere from 217-225) I am not big I surprise all the nurses with how heavy I am, ( thank goodness I have a very physically demanding job, keeps those macho muscles built up) HAHAHAHAHAHAHA I wear a size 36 waist 32 length pant. ONLY cause I can’t find 35’s so I always have to wear a belt

Ok, now my neighbor is oh 5’5”, 165 lbs? His next statement is this “ What size jeans do you wear?” I tell him 34’s 36’s which is true (I chould wear 34’s but they are too snug in the crotch for me He then says “I wear a 32” WTF I’m trying to figure out, The LAST time I wore a 32 was in Basic training, and that was cause I went from a 28 just from eating all that delicious chow. LOL

But, I need to make them work, So I try to put them on, ( you did see I said TRY) I eventually wiggled my big ass into those little jeans. And the first thought that popped into my head was “ Fat guy in a little guy’s coat RIPPPPP" ( if you don’t understand that line go rent Tommy Boy, Chris Farhley, and David Spade). And you will understand it.

Well anyway, Back to these super-tight jeans, All the women would have loved to see me and my so-called nice ass in them well I tried to button them, to no avail, I tried to zip them, I got them about a quarter of the way. So by now, and we’re talkin maybe two minutes, I have pretty much lost feeling in my feet due to lack of circulation, NO, NOT Funny (Okay, maybe a little funny) And I thought Willie the one-eyed wonder wienie was cramped in 34’s. Hell I felt sorry for him in these. It was a good thing I had a longer tee-shirt on cause there I am walking around ALL day with MY NEIGHBORS pants unbuttoned and unzipped.

My sympathies to all you women who, do that to themselves. Now can you top that story?

pic is of Fire Marshall Bill, an old Jim Carrey bit from before he was famous


PassionKisses4Me 44F

6/22/2006 3:56 pm

LMAO...now where is the picture of your sexy ass in those jeans

Poor baby...hugs soft hugs to you

Becky


~Becky~


rm_DarknStar 54F
2823 posts
6/22/2006 5:18 pm

Lost me on the fat guy and a little coat!

Nice post! THX for sharing

and it would have been much better to have a PICTURE of those jeans on ya!


angelofmercy5 58F
17881 posts
6/22/2006 5:21 pm

Oh God! This just cracked me up. And I can remember days where I'd lay on the bed to zip myself into my jeans.....of course, I didn't have any one-eyed wonder to worry about! Hmmmmmmm.....top this story....??? Well, I was babysitting for my grandsons after my daughter's maternity leave was over. It was winter...her house was cold...and she didn't get home until about 2 am. So, I'd race home from work and change my clothes and run over there. So, I started putting on my flannel nightie......and my coat....and just laying down on their couch to sleep while the kids slept. No undies on either. So, one night on the way home, dead tired, I remember that I had to be to work at 6am and there wasn't any bread in the house. So....I pulled into 7-11...and ran into the store...forgetting about my nightie. Which wasn't so bad except the clerk said...."uh mam....." and pointed to my back side....where the nightgown was caught under the coat and my butt was hanging out. Boy was my ass...er face red!!!


rm_cru1972 44M
4407 posts
6/22/2006 5:27 pm

    Quoting PassionKisses4Me:
    LMAO...now where is the picture of your sexy ass in those jeans

    Poor baby...hugs soft hugs to you

    Becky
I couldn't move far enuogh to take the pic myself, and I couldn't waddle fast enough to get in front of the camera for a timer pic


frbnkslady 48F
6183 posts
6/22/2006 5:28 pm

LMAOOO.. awww hell, we just had a GF stand on the sidewalk with our jeans held open, we jumped from the roof T

T




firestarter665 42M/39F

6/22/2006 6:17 pm

"And the first thought that popped into my head was “ Fat guy in a little guy’s coat RIPPPPP" "

I am sorry. LMFAO right now!

I hope tomorrow is better for you.


rm_cru1972 44M
4407 posts
6/22/2006 6:56 pm

    Quoting rm_DarknStar:
    Lost me on the fat guy and a little coat!

    Nice post! THX for sharing

    and it would have been much better to have a PICTURE of those jeans on ya!
See if you can't rent the movie there is a scene in a motel room where Chris puts on David's Jacket, he is dancin around singing that then he flex's his arms and rips the back right up the middle. kinda like a hulk thing


twirly_girl 47F

6/22/2006 6:56 pm


Mmm...

I'm divided here. I'd don't know whether to be
turned on or to laugh.
Huh... guess both will do.


-Nikki


rm_cru1972 44M
4407 posts
6/22/2006 7:02 pm

    Quoting angelofmercy5:
    Oh God! This just cracked me up. And I can remember days where I'd lay on the bed to zip myself into my jeans.....of course, I didn't have any one-eyed wonder to worry about! Hmmmmmmm.....top this story....??? Well, I was babysitting for my grandsons after my daughter's maternity leave was over. It was winter...her house was cold...and she didn't get home until about 2 am. So, I'd race home from work and change my clothes and run over there. So, I started putting on my flannel nightie......and my coat....and just laying down on their couch to sleep while the kids slept. No undies on either. So, one night on the way home, dead tired, I remember that I had to be to work at 6am and there wasn't any bread in the house. So....I pulled into 7-11...and ran into the store...forgetting about my nightie. Which wasn't so bad except the clerk said...."uh mam....." and pointed to my back side....where the nightgown was caught under the coat and my butt was hanging out. Boy was my ass...er face red!!!
OMG wasn't your butt cold? Butt... seriously, I spose that ranks right up there. Butt I'll bet it was a lovely site.


rm_cru1972 44M
4407 posts
6/22/2006 7:05 pm

    Quoting frbnkslady:
    LMAOOO.. awww hell, we just had a GF stand on the sidewalk with our jeans held open, we jumped from the roof T
I've heard that. You do realize I don't know how you gals could even walk I could barely move my legs


rm_cru1972 44M
4407 posts
6/22/2006 7:08 pm

    Quoting rm_yummmy669:
    Thanks for the laugh...I almost wet myself...

    Bet you won't do that again, will you?

    yummmy
ABSOFLIPPINLUTLY not!!!!! In fact I'm gonna put a pair of bibs in my locker in a plastic bag, just so that never happens again

glad you didn't wet yourself


rm_cru1972 44M
4407 posts
6/22/2006 7:13 pm

    Quoting firestarter665:
    "And the first thought that popped into my head was “ Fat guy in a little guy’s coat RIPPPPP" "

    I am sorry. LMFAO right now!

    I hope tomorrow is better for you.
You know the scene then?

Why be sorry I figured if you guys couldn't get a laff out of my daily life Why bother posting about this

It sure can't be MUCH worse LOL


rm_cru1972 44M
4407 posts
6/22/2006 7:15 pm

    Quoting lioness860:
    i bet your ass was hot!!
    no rest for the wicked ROFL
My backside was warm, but with my frontside hangin out it was nice and cool


sweetSinn2690
2943 posts
6/22/2006 7:58 pm

OMG..I can't stop laffin'!!!!...sorry dude that's funny!
At least ya didn't have to walk home and miss a days work.

Only story I have was not about me...but my boss one day showed up at work with 2 different shoes on, apparently she got up really early
and dressed in the dark...lol. We had to laugh at her ass alllll day long!...but she was laffin' too so it was cool.

I love Tommy Boy...one of our favotites to watch here, funny as hell!
Better Luck tomorrow!...lololololololol

xoxo
sweetSinn


Oh WHATEVER BITCHES!


rm_cru1972 44M
4407 posts
6/22/2006 9:46 pm

    Quoting twirly_girl:

    Mmm...

    I'm divided here. I'd don't know whether to be
    turned on or to laugh.
    Huh... guess both will do.

I supposedd if you must, a little wet laghter is ok


LustyTaurus 48M  
21253 posts
6/22/2006 9:52 pm

hahaha...all the shops I worked in supplied coveralls...and on hot days I'd wear them with nothing inderneath except my boxers!!

Funny story cru...thanks


HeartlessBitch69 46F

6/22/2006 11:27 pm

Well as a matter of fact I do have a story, lol not as funny as yours. When I put my scrubs on today I thought I looked pretty fucking good. I like my clothing loose and roomy cause I do alot of bending and stooping over and lifting. I wear draw string scrub pants, and had them tied up good enough. Around supper time I was walkin right outta my pants. My scrubs kept fallin off of my ass, but damn my undies were still up where they should have been. Every time I bent over I heard from behind me from the freakin peanut gallery "Hey crack kills!" But I did get alot of compliments on my "TRAMP STAMP" (tattoo)


SacredStarDance

6/23/2006 7:03 am

lmao..toooooooooo funny...

made me remember my hubby going on a fishing trip with all the guys from work and was leaving at 4am.. i woke up with him. I packed some things for him laid out some clothes .. grabed a white t-shirt for him.. he threw it on.. ran out the door cause the guys showed up early...the guys waited until they were on this big charter boat with 15 other guys..to tell my hubby his shirt said " I'm a bad girl "... yes he got more ribb's then fish..lol

under the stars
We choose to write
you choose what you comprehend.
read twice and be nice
every key stroke... has a heart beat


rm_cru1972 44M
4407 posts
6/23/2006 7:17 pm

    Quoting sweetSinn2690:
    OMG..I can't stop laffin'!!!!...sorry dude that's funny!
    At least ya didn't have to walk home and miss a days work.

    Only story I have was not about me...but my boss one day showed up at work with 2 different shoes on, apparently she got up really early
    and dressed in the dark...lol. We had to laugh at her ass alllll day long!...but she was laffin' too so it was cool.

    I love Tommy Boy...one of our favotites to watch here, funny as hell!
    Better Luck tomorrow!...lololololololol

    xoxo
    sweetSinn
I'll bet they were her shoes, so at least they fit. At least today was a little better


DAISYDUKE1004 50F
534 posts
6/23/2006 7:41 pm

Dam...you are so flippin funny...LMAO...cracking up thinking about it...as I was reading it... I am thinking "what the hell is gonna happen here"???...LOL...too much...I would of taken the day off...

Thanks for sharing...I miss reading your blogs...my stomach and cheeks is killing me...

Take Care ~Daisy~


libgemOH 56M/52F

6/23/2006 7:49 pm

Pictures???? We want pictures!!!!!! -B


rm_cru1972 44M
4407 posts
6/23/2006 9:00 pm

    Quoting LustyTaurus:
    hahaha...all the shops I worked in supplied coveralls...and on hot days I'd wear them with nothing inderneath except my boxers!!

    Funny story cru...thanks
I have thought of that, but I can't find any I like. I have to look good too ya know


rm_cru1972 44M
4407 posts
6/23/2006 9:03 pm

    Quoting HeartlessBitch69:
    Well as a matter of fact I do have a story, lol not as funny as yours. When I put my scrubs on today I thought I looked pretty fucking good. I like my clothing loose and roomy cause I do alot of bending and stooping over and lifting. I wear draw string scrub pants, and had them tied up good enough. Around supper time I was walkin right outta my pants. My scrubs kept fallin off of my ass, but damn my undies were still up where they should have been. Every time I bent over I heard from behind me from the freakin peanut gallery "Hey crack kills!" But I did get alot of compliments on my "TRAMP STAMP" (tattoo)
I wish I was there to see that.


rm_cru1972 44M
4407 posts
6/23/2006 9:06 pm

    Quoting SensuallyKatey:


    oh my hooooooly jeans and purple (well alright if we must lets fuck)
    flippie floppies.....
    nope...soooo not even gonna bother with any funnier stories alltho the day the Geek squad accidentally called me was...ok,,so just plain naughty!!

    Hottie,,,ya have had me laffin for five minutes now and tears runnin down me cheeks.....
    THIS is more than delightful!!!
    huggles and kissles,
    Kate
I'm sooooo glad I could bring a smile to your face and a laff to your day. I sooooo enjoy making you feel better.


rm_cru1972 44M
4407 posts
6/23/2006 9:09 pm

    Quoting SacredStarDance:
    lmao..toooooooooo funny...

    made me remember my hubby going on a fishing trip with all the guys from work and was leaving at 4am.. i woke up with him. I packed some things for him laid out some clothes .. grabed a white t-shirt for him.. he threw it on.. ran out the door cause the guys showed up early...the guys waited until they were on this big charter boat with 15 other guys..to tell my hubby his shirt said " I'm a bad girl "... yes he got more ribb's then fish..lol
ROFLMAO I love that!!! Now I don't feel so funny.


rm_cru1972 44M
4407 posts
6/23/2006 9:11 pm

    Quoting rm_flyaway1012:
    that is funny! I dont know what I woulda done. !

    thanks cru

    btw, this comment box was number 777
    cool huh
And the thing is IT IS MY RL experiences

very cool I get that one alot


rm_cru1972 44M
4407 posts
6/23/2006 9:15 pm

    Quoting rm_Dysgyzed:
    Okay...now, I'm taking back the Brother designation permanently cause NO Sister should sit here grinning like this, Wishing that she could see your ass and willy in the tight pants.

    Gave me *Bright Glimmers*


But I am very *pleased* to give the *Bright Glimers*


rm_cru1972 44M
4407 posts
6/23/2006 9:18 pm

    Quoting libgemOH:
    Pictures???? We want pictures!!!!!! -B
I DID try but it would have been a two person operation, and there was NO way I was gonna get one of the guys from work to take the pics LOL

I would have died if anyone knew


rm_cru1972 44M
4407 posts
6/23/2006 11:56 pm

    Quoting DAISYDUKE1004:
    Dam...you are so flippin funny...LMAO...cracking up thinking about it...as I was reading it... I am thinking "what the hell is gonna happen here"???...LOL...too much...I would of taken the day off...

    Thanks for sharing...I miss reading your blogs...my stomach and cheeks is killing me...

    Take Care ~Daisy~
OOps sorry. I would have liked to take the day off but I wasn't lookin forward to the 30 mile walk home LOL, or getting wrote up. Glad you got a great belly laff


HBowt2 58F

6/24/2006 4:12 am

    Quoting rm_cru1972:
    I have thought of that, but I can't find any I like. I have to look good too ya know
well it sounds to me as if you look just fine.....


rm_cru1972 44M
4407 posts
6/24/2006 12:38 pm

Aww thanks H. But in the coveralls everybody looks like they are walkin around with a load in their pants


imLadyBambi 58M/50F

6/25/2006 10:12 am

Cru,
cru1972

LMAO!!Too funny!!

I like fire marshall Bill too,he just really turns me on.LOL

I would like to invite you to visit our blog site @

imLadyBambi

You might just get a good laugh or two out of it.If ya decide to visit,please leave a comment so I'll know you were there.Thanks!!

Lady B.


rm_cru1972 44M
4407 posts
6/25/2006 10:37 am

    Quoting playrigal:
    Good thing you didn't have to reach high for something???

    This was too funny, laughing still while typing this!
    Can't top this one...oh no...Thanks for sharing this one!
Very good point but I did have to do alot of bending over


rm_cru1972 44M
4407 posts
6/25/2006 1:39 pm

    Quoting imLadyBambi:
    Cru,
    cru1972

    LMAO!!Too funny!!

    I like fire marshall Bill too,he just really turns me on.LOL

    I would like to invite you to visit our blog site @

    imLadyBambi

    You might just get a good laugh or two out of it.If ya decide to visit,please leave a comment so I'll know you were there.Thanks!!

    Lady B.
Welcome, He was the only reason I wtced that show, OH and the Fly Girls were ok too. I 'll be over to see ya'll. I think I have been there before


saddletrampsk 54F

6/27/2006 2:54 pm

LMAO
I am still trying to picture you in the tight jeans unzipped welding..lol


rm_cru1972 44M
4407 posts
6/27/2006 5:29 pm

Hell thanks to one of the guys there for my initiation to DAY shift I was pantsed and had to keep welding. LOL I think I just got another post Thanks saddle


rm_cru1972 44M
4407 posts
6/28/2006 2:17 am

    Quoting rm_mzhunyhole:
    Yeah..I can relate..I wear a size 10..one night I suffed my ass in a size 8..damn did my ass look GOOD!I didn't go to the bathroom all nite..cause I knew there was no way I was gonna get those things zipped back up..after that night ..I never got them on again..must have been a fluke.
MMMMMMM I'll bet that was quite the site


pretty_blue_eyes 38F
2091 posts
6/28/2006 9:42 am

Hey there! Its my first visit to your blog. To funny of a story! I wonder what your neighbor was thinking the whole time. lol. I'm sure he will have some thoughts next time he wears those jeans! To bad no one had a camera phone! Did anyone give you strange looks at work? Ask if you were okay? lol.


rm_cru1972 44M
4407 posts
6/28/2006 5:11 pm

    Quoting pretty_blue_eyes:
    Hey there! Its my first visit to your blog. To funny of a story! I wonder what your neighbor was thinking the whole time. lol. I'm sure he will have some thoughts next time he wears those jeans! To bad no one had a camera phone! Did anyone give you strange looks at work? Ask if you were okay? lol.
Welcome, and thanks for the visit. The whole day he was thinking I hope he doesn't rip out the seams LOL And I got MANY strange looks LOL


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