Martha Stewart vs. Maxine  

clitalicious67 49F
2596 posts
6/30/2006 4:08 am

Last Read:
7/2/2006 3:20 am

Martha Stewart vs. Maxine

Ok ya'll...this really cracked me up...so here is a giggle for Friday:

MARTHA'S WAY

Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice cream drips.

*Maxine's Way *

Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for Pete's sake! You are probably lying on the couch with your feet up eating it, anyway!

Martha's Way


To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes.

Maxine's Way

Buy Hungry Jack mashed potato mix, keep it in the pantry for up to a year.

Martha's Way

When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking pan, use a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won't be any white mess on the outside of the cake.

Maxine's Way

Go to the bakery! They'll even decorate it for you.

Martha's Way

If you accidentally oversalt a dish while it's still cooking, drop in a peeled potato and it will absorb the excess salt for an instant "fix-me-up."

Maxine's Way

If you oversalt a dish while you are cooking, that's too bad. Please recite with me the real woman's motto: "I made it and you will eat it and I don't care how bad it tastes!"

Martha's Way

Wrap celery in aluminum foil when putting in the refrigerator and it will keep for weeks.

Maxine's Way

Celery? Never heard of it!

Martha's Way

Brush some beaten egg white over pie crust before baking to yield a beautiful glossy finish.

Maxine's Way

The Mrs. Smith frozen pie directions do not include brushing egg whites over the crust so I don't.

Martha's Way

Cure for headaches: take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead. The throbbing will go away.

Maxine's Way (I love this one!)

Take a lime, mix it with tequila, chill and drink!

Martha's Way

If you have a problem opening jars, try using latex dishwashing gloves. They give a non-slip grip that makes opening jars easy.

Maxine's Way

Go ask that very cute neighbor if he can open it for you.

Martha's Way

Don't throw out all that leftover wine. Freeze into ice cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces.

Maxine's Way

Leftover wine???????????
HELLO !!!!!!!


rm_CuummDrop 49F
2591 posts
6/30/2006 5:14 am

wendy's Way

Go ask that very cute neighbor if he can open it for you.

wendy's Way *

Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for Pete's sake! That's what i do...lol

practice makes perfect,,, ya know...

Now won't last forever, so use it wisely~c


rm_mtnravyn 60M
890 posts
6/30/2006 5:18 am

Two of my favorites from Maxine

If you can't change your mind are you sure you have one?
If there is a tourist season, how come we can't shoot them?


sexyariesgirl 57F

6/30/2006 4:55 pm

Heh! I LOVE Maxine! Really enjoyed this one.

Power To FOK


champagnechaser 41F
1639 posts
6/30/2006 7:09 pm

I've tried maxine's headache cure and it works very well


clitalicious67 49F

7/1/2006 4:24 am

    Quoting rm_CuummDrop:
    wendy's Way

    Go ask that very cute neighbor if he can open it for you.

    wendy's Way *

    Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for Pete's sake! That's what i do...lol

    practice makes perfect,,, ya know...
Ha! You said suck!


clitalicious67 49F

7/1/2006 4:25 am

    Quoting rm_mtnravyn:
    Two of my favorites from Maxine

    If you can't change your mind are you sure you have one?
    If there is a tourist season, how come we can't shoot them?
LOL yep have read both of them before as well...you have to love Maxine!


clitalicious67 49F

7/1/2006 4:26 am

    Quoting sexyariesgirl:
    Heh! I LOVE Maxine! Really enjoyed this one.
Glad ya did


clitalicious67 49F

7/1/2006 4:27 am

    Quoting champagnechaser:
    I've tried maxine's headache cure and it works very well
I am with ya on that one sister!


reverend21 49M
1913 posts
7/2/2006 2:59 am

ya gotta love Maxine


clitalicious67 49F

7/2/2006 3:20 am

LOL yep I can soooo relate to her.


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