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Right, well I had some kind of epiphany following a conversation with a few of my female "buds." Seems a lot of women aren't willing to share, or even admit to their partners that they do, in fact, have sexual fantasies. They use the fantasies with their partners to get off but wouldn't admit it to said partners, even under the threat of death
I don't quite understand. I seem to be missing something. These women will admit and go into great detail regarding the fantasies with other women although usually after a great deal of wine/beer/liquor of some sort but won't admit it to the man to whom they have committed.
Where or what is the shame in a sexual fantasy? Some will, forever, remain fantasies - like a sexual experience with a movie actor or rock star but some can be brought to reality, to everyone's great enjoyment.
The Master/slave fantasy - it seems to be a real popular one with women. Being subjugated and in some cases, a simulated scenario.
(Of course, this is so, so politically incorrect!!!)
I have a fairly large circle of women friends and this has been a topic of conversation on more than one occasion. We do tend to talk about in terms of psychology and what it infers from that point of view but the underlying emotions? Excitement, sexual excitement at the possibilities. A forced sexual encounter with all the safeguards of a committed relationship. It certainly gets a lot of panties wet in our little "bull" sessions.
Being forced to their knees for oral sex or bent over for a rear entry.
(Not anal, seems there is still a lot of misconceptions in the female population regarding anal sex. Personally? I think it rocks.)
Being tied up is a big one as well; helpless to the man, a servant to his every whim. (One of my personal favourites.) The helpless sex slave.
It is fair to mention, these are not simple women. These are intelligent, urban women - some of them leaders in their fields of endeavours. Leaders in their communities. Women brought up with feminism and Power to the Pussy. In every day life? No way would they admit to any of this but over drinks, in the safety of a giant female womb? They admit it, they admit to craving it but these strong, independent women shudder at mentioning any of it to the men in their lives. A real shame. A major part of a healthy, happy and really fun sex life is communication. Not just what we don't like but what we like!! What makes our pussies turn into Niagara Falls.
Sure, we've come up with all sorts of reasons stemming from our psyches, our chromosomes, society and pressures to perform but the bottomline? We like it - my group anyway - we like being subjugated in bed. We like the whole caveman thing. We WANT it.
Actually left my husband a note - describing what I would really like in the next little while and you have to know, it involved being his sex slave. Some bondage, spanking and total subjugation. Not in those words...nothing sexy about the term "subjugation." I can write down and dirty as well as the next person
So what's the answer? I dunno about a global solution to the women's issue of communicating fantasies...I know that wine, beer and booze works for my group Maybe an intimate dinner? Followed by a little honest discussion? Maybe bringing up the topic by way of a "friend" and guys, for chrissakes...don't say a female friend...your partner will turn into an iceberg to rival the size of the one that sunk the Titanic.
Mention a conversation with a MALE co-worker or buddy..something about how this friend and his girlfriend discovered this WONDERFUL way of adding to their sex life. It may or may not work. Remember, you are dealing with a woman and guys? We don't think the same way that you do...you have to be very careful how you broach the topic. Otherwise you may find yourself on intimate terms with the living room sofa.