Sunday ...  

catcherdg9 67M
4 posts
10/30/2005 1:44 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Sunday ...

So I woke up this morning thinking it was Monday and, well, felt silly arguing with the calender. I'm a kinda older hippie dude who was raised to be an IZOD guy ... actually the IZOD part of me serves well for those times I need the appearance of social fitness ... I guess my earing is a dead giveaway that it IS just appearance ... or maybe my thinning long haired ponytail .. laughing ..

I'm brand new to this FriendsNetwork and have found myself with all kinds of thoughts about myself and all the lovely people I'm interacting with .. I'm about as open, accepting and non- judgemental as anyone you're likely to run into. Its pretty interesting to see ourselves on paper with our thoughts and answers to questions that don't say exactly what we want to express .. gofigure ...

I was reading a blog by TexasRose? the other day & she was addressing 'transparency', I believe. One of the things I've been curious about in the last few years is whether I as an individual could withstand/manage/endure what true transparency might bring me ... IE: Lets say I have one of those 'tickertape' kyrons embedded in my forehead and this window randomly displays my thoughts to whomever I may be with. Would she/he be surprised/pleased/mortified/OTHER with this .. truthtelling apparatus? Sometimes I find myself thinking thoughts that seem to have come from out of nowhere, and I'm not sure that my 'true nature' can justify the departure .. Oh well ... I don't have one of those gizzmos, but I still want the tranparency to have the genuine and authentic quality others seek ...

I'm separated and living alone for approximately four years ... property settlement pending, I will be divorced ... Its a strange limbo to be in because if I were to meet someone who was interested in marrying, I can't now ... truth be told, I'm not certain another marriage is in the stars for me, but that then begs the question an interested partner might ask "How can you be committed to me if you won't/can't marry me?? How do I know you're telling me the truth about your status ???" ...ask my attorney ...
laughing ... No, really ... well ... if she'll consent to release my info, I'm happy to let you speak with my attorney!! The filing is public record & I'll share sensitive documents!

On to other things ... I am a professional with very specialized skills .. doesn't necessarily make me special, but my skills are ... I work from 4pm to midnight Mon thru Fri & I am fortunate enough to work from home with a laptop and cell phone ... its a curious/sad/compelling/ [and at times] absolutely cool job ... I can take my laptop and cell anywhere I can get a phone line & have worked from Washington DC, New York City, Nashville .... The main problem is that most of my friends/aquaintences aren't working when I am .... However, one night while things were slow, I got one of the best *fucks* I've ever experienced from my then girlfriend .. It was exquisite .. forgot all about the phone [that was gracious enough not to ring] while I gave LADY a badass back/leg/neck/shoulder/foot/torso rub prior to what comes next .. I felt kinda like I had my hand in the cookie jar ... what a cookie!

** on the word 'fuck' ... at times it expresses a physical act in a somewhat vulgar manner [to some], however, I usually don't lay down with just anybody .. I usually want to 'know' someone that I'm going to share the gift of physical intimacy with ... I've had my share of 'one nighters', and they are great for really intense 'cutting loose'. I do like to think that 'making love' is a purposeful act & if I'm available, why not?? This, then, is the greatest source of difficulty for me in defining who I am as a potential partner ... I am higly capable of having a dedicated relationship without 'going off the farm' ... common goals and interests and ability to communicate seem to be the cement, and discovering these takes time ...

I reckon its time to put my 'blog' up for a while
Happy to have a place to work on my thoughts ... hope you are well ... peaceandlove..... catcher


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