|Blogs > carmel62764 > a carmeliscious world...|
morning everyone!! i woke up naked and...alone. listening to Heart right now--not "Dog & Butterfly" (although I do like that particular song), but one called "One Word"...good for a romantic moment--IF i was in a romantic moment, which i am not right now!!
was just looking at Chris' profile and picture and daydreaming about being with him (again)--no, we haven't done the deed as of yet, but with some good luck on my side this week will be the week!!
**note to my friend in Cali who reads my blog religiously: I WILL BE CAREFUL!! NOTHING WILL HAPPEN THAT I DON'T WANT TO HAPPEN!
it sure would have been nice to have someone here to wake up next to naked...ah dreaming again of being heavily in the throes of undulating passion!! it is such a heady mixture, is it not? finding myself awakened by a searching tongue on my clit...softly whispering my lover's name as he probes within me--seeking out the motherlode...throwing my head back against the pillows as he continues to lick and suck away at my pussy...mmmm!!
Problem is, i want that feeling on a CONSTANT and CONTINOUS basis...and I guess I'm just too much woman for the average white male (not to be confused with Average White Band)to handle!! is it wrong to want a REAL MAN to love and be with me? I got the "lady in the streets" down to a science--now it's time to find the right man and make the "freak in the bed" part REAL!! Not that it isn't (as Wayne and my FUBU Todd will easily attest to)...I guess what I fear is that I've outgrown my current boyfriend (after five years together) and i think we both know it!! after all, if you choose to sleep on the couch while your sexy girlfriend is sleeping nude in the bedroom...what else can be said?
i know that i am falling for Chris...and that excites me and scares me all at the same time!! I think he's a real hottie...a close approximation of what i'd like my "perfect sex beast" to look like!! Right size frame, right height (6'1"--roughly 280 and solid in the right spots), angelic and innocent looking face...but the imaginations and movements are straight DEVILISH!! He reminds me SO MUCH of a man that I used to date when I was living in Pennsylvania...
His name was Jeff, he was an ex-biker, he had long auburn hair (he used to let me braid his ponytail at times), he was married...yet he taught me EVERYTHING sexually that i now know and use on a regular basis!! We dated/fooled around from 1987 until I moved to Alabama in 2001...I miss him so much. Chris reminds me of Jeff SO MUCH--his mindset is exactly the same!! I see so much of how Jeff was in Chris...and it's drawing me to him like a moth to a flame!
If we--Chris and I--had met when I was in Pennsylvania, I probably would have been married to him by now for at least a good 10 years...had several kids...and we'd still be fucking each other's brains out!! There is something there within Chris that I recognize from when i was with Jeff (or from when I was with Eric, my other ex that I miss DEEPLY)...I just need to see if it is that "hidden element" that I am missing with my current bf--and if it is, i have decisions to make...
8/27/2006 8:19 am
I wish I could have been there naked with u.|