My phobias..  

carebearluv2 41F
1267 posts
5/9/2006 8:38 pm

Last Read:
5/23/2006 8:03 pm

My phobias..

A phobia is described as a persistent, abnormal, and irrational fear of a specific thing or situation that compels one to avoid it, despite the awareness and reassurance that it is not dangerous. Some symptoms of a phobia include shortness of breath, nausea, tingling or shivers, sweating and chest pain.

What people need to understand about phobias is the people that suffer from them know they are irrational. For example, someone can easily ski down a mountain, but have a phobia about peering out the window of 10 story building. I know this because I suffer from at least two phobias.

It's important for me to explain that I have not been diagnosed officially with these. I have never seen a doctor, nor am I on medication. I know these are phobias because I experience the type of fear described; it paralyzes me. It affects my sleep, my appetite, my attitude and my concentration.

I have a phobia of mice and frogs. Yes, frogs! I am absolutely terrified of both of them. I know it is irrational to fear two things that will not hurt me; yet, the sight of either of them paralyzes me and affects me for days. I can trace both back to my childhood, yet I fear them more the older I get.

Currently, I have a mouse in my apartment. I spotted it yesterday after unknowingly trapping it in the bathroom with me. Luckily, it left before I did but it has now invaded my house. I have a majorly clean place and very little space in my apartment. Yet, he's obviously found something that he likes. There are currently 20 traps set and until he is caught, I am staying at my sister's house.

It may seem trivial to most people and an extreme action to take. In fact, most people that know about it have laughed at me. Meanwhile, I have obsessed about it, read every website known to man about eliminating it and lost two nights of sleep. Everytime my brother comes back stating it hasn't been caught, I cry. A pain in my chest grips me and I fight for air. I have spent the last two days thinking about it and fighting back nausea. I've thought about everything from the disease it's carrying to what it might be doing at any particular hour. It's become an obsession.

When I encounter a frog, the same thing happens, only they are much easier to kill. I usually send my son after them. I believe it is the sudden movement of these creatures that triggers it, but I am not sure.

I admit all of this publicly, at the expense of my pride, to help people understand what it is like to have an anxiety that overwhelms you. To remind those that don't know what it's like to have some sensitivity. I am not vying for attention nor do I want pity. We can't control this nor do we understand it. It's like being trapped in a prison that I made myself, yet can't flee from.

I know I need to go see someone for this, but can't bring myself to face the embarassment. This was my first step in doing so. Thanks for letting me do it and for listening.


norprin5 55M

5/10/2006 7:51 am

not laughing, cbluv. phobias are not funny at all - they can be crippling.

i've got a combination of claustrophobia and agoraphobia...too many people in a small place, and i start to panic...

*hugs*

King Nor XVIII


honestandreal30 41F

5/10/2006 8:18 am

i know how you feel. I have a problem with heights and wide open spaces like the ocean. 1st cruise i went on it took almost the whole wek before i could attempt to look out to the ocean...made me sweat and get short of breath. something about not being able to see anything but open space and water....also get short of breath when comes to heights...DON"T LOOK DOWN!!!!!

anxiety has always been a problem of mine. so bad that i developed a tremor due to it...which i do have to take medication for or i would not be able to function very well. if i did not take meds for my tremor...i shake as like someone with Parkison's disease... those of us who develope of inherit anxiety problems have alot to try and deal with just from everyday life. it is such a battle to keep anxiety under control!!!

great topic carebear!!!!!!

honest
real


rm_Rico0825 54M
483 posts
5/10/2006 9:39 am

I'm here for you lady. And understand wholeheartedly. I have ADD and also have intermittent Social and just plain anxiety.

For instance, in my old job, I ran a new electric circuit to put in a new oven that was electric ignition instead of pilot light. That night, though I knew %100 all the electrical connections and gas connections were tested and properly done, I woke three times during the night, got dressed and went to the apartment "just to make double and triple sure" everything was alright. Thank God it was a vacant apartment, or I would have been freaking out in worry.

I have also gone through periods where I get these feelings of complete despair about loved ones, and that something bad has happened to them. The thing is the only bad thing that was happening to them was "ME" calling them in the middle of the night to make sure!!!LOL

I laugh but it really isn't funny. And like you said all along when your going through it, you know it is just obsurd. I have been treated for Adult Deficit Disorder for about two years and the anxiety about the same. Actually I went to the doctor for the oven incident, and that is when they also told me about the ADD.

But my poor parents and I got put through the ringer all through my schooling years. Why does this kid have one of the highest IQ's and is always on the bottom 1/8 of his class if not last in grades. They used to accuse my parents of not caring about my schooling, even though my sisters would be on the honor role???

So I have complete sympathy for you. And it makes it worse when people laugh. Funny as hell to others unless you are the one with those feelings inside you.

Don't be embarrassed. You would be surprised how many people there are!!!! Go see someone. Have you tried Googling about these symptoms. I sure you will find tons of support and information!!!

But don't be embarrassed. Nothing to be embarrassed about. But I also understand that's the same as what you consider to be irrational fears, the embarrassment just won't stop. That's why it nice to find people who truly understand what your going though.

Good luck beautiful, it will all work out!!!!!


curious082385 31F
4925 posts
5/11/2006 1:12 am

*big hugs*

I have a totally irrational fear of spiders, roaches and creepy-crawlies. Same thing as you with mice. My chest locks up and I freak. We would never laugh at you, my dear twin. Fear and anxiety are serious things and can be completely crippling to some people. I'm glad that you can trust enough to use this place as the first step towards dealing with that fear.


carebearluv2 41F

5/20/2006 8:43 pm

    Quoting norprin5:
    not laughing, cbluv. phobias are not funny at all - they can be crippling.

    i've got a combination of claustrophobia and agoraphobia...too many people in a small place, and i start to panic...

    *hugs*
Norprin, thanks for the support, it means alot! I am sorry to hear about the agoraphobia. I know it can often be the most severe and hardest to cure of all phobias. Hugging ya right back...


carebearluv2 41F

5/20/2006 8:46 pm

    Quoting honestandreal30:
    i know how you feel. I have a problem with heights and wide open spaces like the ocean. 1st cruise i went on it took almost the whole wek before i could attempt to look out to the ocean...made me sweat and get short of breath. something about not being able to see anything but open space and water....also get short of breath when comes to heights...DON"T LOOK DOWN!!!!!

    anxiety has always been a problem of mine. so bad that i developed a tremor due to it...which i do have to take medication for or i would not be able to function very well. if i did not take meds for my tremor...i shake as like someone with Parkison's disease... those of us who develope of inherit anxiety problems have alot to try and deal with just from everyday life. it is such a battle to keep anxiety under control!!!

    great topic carebear!!!!!!

    honest
    real
H, I am sorry to hear you face a simliar battle as me. I do not take medication but I have noticed the panic attacks are far more frequent and I fight them often. I definitely offer you my support.


carebearluv2 41F

5/23/2006 8:01 pm

    Quoting rm_Rico0825:
    I'm here for you lady. And understand wholeheartedly. I have ADD and also have intermittent Social and just plain anxiety.

    For instance, in my old job, I ran a new electric circuit to put in a new oven that was electric ignition instead of pilot light. That night, though I knew %100 all the electrical connections and gas connections were tested and properly done, I woke three times during the night, got dressed and went to the apartment "just to make double and triple sure" everything was alright. Thank God it was a vacant apartment, or I would have been freaking out in worry.

    I have also gone through periods where I get these feelings of complete despair about loved ones, and that something bad has happened to them. The thing is the only bad thing that was happening to them was "ME" calling them in the middle of the night to make sure!!!LOL

    I laugh but it really isn't funny. And like you said all along when your going through it, you know it is just obsurd. I have been treated for Adult Deficit Disorder for about two years and the anxiety about the same. Actually I went to the doctor for the oven incident, and that is when they also told me about the ADD.

    But my poor parents and I got put through the ringer all through my schooling years. Why does this kid have one of the highest IQ's and is always on the bottom 1/8 of his class if not last in grades. They used to accuse my parents of not caring about my schooling, even though my sisters would be on the honor role???

    So I have complete sympathy for you. And it makes it worse when people laugh. Funny as hell to others unless you are the one with those feelings inside you.

    Don't be embarrassed. You would be surprised how many people there are!!!! Go see someone. Have you tried Googling about these symptoms. I sure you will find tons of support and information!!!

    But don't be embarrassed. Nothing to be embarrassed about. But I also understand that's the same as what you consider to be irrational fears, the embarrassment just won't stop. That's why it nice to find people who truly understand what your going though.

    Good luck beautiful, it will all work out!!!!!
Rico, thanks sweetie for sharing your trials with me. I have those feelings of dread you spoke about. It usually reveals itself in my dreams and they have been getting more frequent recently. Thank you so much for offering your support, it means alot!


carebearluv2 41F

5/23/2006 8:03 pm

    Quoting curious082385:
    *big hugs*

    I have a totally irrational fear of spiders, roaches and creepy-crawlies. Same thing as you with mice. My chest locks up and I freak. We would never laugh at you, my dear twin. Fear and anxiety are serious things and can be completely crippling to some people. I'm glad that you can trust enough to use this place as the first step towards dealing with that fear.
It's not a matter of trust for me I guess. I put stuff out there in hopes that other people will know they aren't alone. I figure I can't be the only one experiencing something at any given moment. I may have conquered my embarassment of putting it up here, but I still can't be in a room with a mouse...maybe one day, I'll get there! BIG HUGS BACK!


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