What the fuck is a virgin anyway?  

boredhornyvirgin 32F
24 posts
7/16/2006 9:39 pm

Last Read:
7/16/2006 9:40 pm

What the fuck is a virgin anyway?

When i picked the handle for my AdultFriendFinder profile, i didn't quite realize what an impact it would have on me. i was propositioned by young men, old men, couples, everyone imaginable. I knew that some of it had to do with the absolute sexual repressiveness of my hometown and the need for individuals with high sex drives to connect without being judged. But most of the lines thrown my way had a different quality. A few, I could tell by my knowledge of language and semantics, were secretly thinking "heh heh a virgin that's kinky". Some thought it was too good to be true that I was a 21 (almost 22 in two weeks) bisexual virgin who writes erotica, masturbates often to porn, and smokes cigars. Others believed i would want to go sexually at a snail's pace and added "i'll go only as far as you want to go". Still others thought i was in danger by offering my virginity on a black lace platter in cyberspace. And if i were to read my profile online without knowing myself intimately and feeling the intact hymen excruciatingly often, I would believe these things too. But it's just not that simple.

I sincerely believe that the reactions to my virginity and "sudden" interest in losing it can
be chalked up to society's reaction in general to sex and virginity. And the reaction is that no one really knows what to do with it. It's a virtue, it's a hinderence, it means you're the first one sacrificed to angry volcano gods. I recently read that even the term "virgin" is impossible to categorize. But here's how it pertains to me: I have sexual experience in almost every point of sexual experience except one. The big kicker. The very act of penis-to-vagina penetration is the last thing I haven't experienced. And it's certainly not from lack of trying. Since I was eighteen I've been trying to lose my pesky hymen by any means necessary. But the response is always the same "i can't do you. you're a virgin. it would be wrong." so for almost four years i have sucked, licked, grabbed, pleased, recieved pleasure, and kissed hungrily waiting on the next guy to say the same thing. it was almost like my lack of a sex life was affecting my sex life. in fact a further examination into why i'm still a virgin will turn up an interesting story that i will share in my next entry. but all of this made me more and more frustrated. i wanted sex and i wanted to get it by any means neccessary. so six days ago while cybering with a man from australia, an advertisement emblazoned with the words "get laid tonight" entered my electronic field of vision. and so here i am.

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