|Blogs > bigarsemonkeys > Big monkey diaries|
Well, of course it is. But you could have been excused for thinking it was just a bit of fun if you watched Hollyoaks in the city the other week. For non Uk residents, this is a (not too bad) expose of a group of beautiful people living in Liverpool. There's sex (straight and not so straight), there's drugs, there's illicit affairs - pretty much the whole pick and mix selection for essencial viewing.
So the story goes - Ben (our dashing but attached protagonist) get's his drink spiked by Kim Marsh (Of Hearsay fame)and she then takes him back to her place and screws the brains of of our unwilling star. On later confiding to his friend what's happened, Ben's told "You lucky bastard, you've found a way to cheat on your girlfriend without having to feel guilty about it"
Wow. Lucky, lucky guy.
Now, let's turn the tables. Let's pretend it's a girl who get's spiked with rohypnol in a club, and a guy takes him back to his place and her. She confides in a friend - who says "You lucky bitch, you've found a way to cheat on your boyfriend without having to feel guilty about it"...?! WTF!!! No no and no again!
So why the double standards? Is it just unrealistic TV?
I don't think so. From personal experience, us guy really don't care that much. Sex will never be as much of a big deal to us. Let me tell you a little story.
It was my first year at Uni, and I had a headache.
I also really wanted to go out clubbing that night - so I did the rounds of the halls of residence trying to source a little pain relief. Nigel (room 14) came up trumps and gave me some pain killers - what he didn't mention was the fact that they were morphine based. Wow! Holy shit.
The downside was that by 11.30 later that night, and a few pints inside me, I was drooling and walking into walls. Then Sonya turned up (name changed to protect identity). Sonya was wide, not particulary attractive and had sideboards
bigger than BA Baracus. Sonya also had had a bit of a thing for me! I knew that the state I was in I'd have to make a quick exit or risk the consequences. I staggered back to halls, but as I arrived I noticed Sonya standing by my door. I hid in a bush for 15 minutes but being drunk and very tired - I gave up and decided to confront the beast. Long story short - despite by mumbled protestations, Sonya ended up jumping me, pinning me down and making sweet sweaty love to me
for over 12 minutes - until I prompty passed out. I may add that this has never happened to me before and God forbid will never happen again (that's the passing out thing, not the sweet, sweaty love thing).
I awoke with an aching head, impending sense of wrongness, and a lingering odour of femail body odour. I HAD SLEPT WITH BA BARACUS'S UGLY TWIN SISTER!!!
Point was - I really wasn't that bothered. Yes I'd been violated in an unholy and unnatural way. And yes, I really hadn't wanted to have sex with Sonya (REALLY REALLY hadn't wanted to have sex with Sonya!)- but at the end of the day, apart from the inevitable teasing from my mates - was it really all that bad? I saw Sonya a few days later, and she apolgised for jumping me. I accepted the apology but swore never to accept pharmaceuticals from Nigel ever again.
So was wrong? - well, it certainly wasn't right, I can tell you that much. But I notched it up to experience and moved on. And I've got to be honest - I really don't consider myself a victim of .
Of course, this experience can't relate to the many horrendous violant that occur around the world every day. And many so-called are just people getting drunk and doing things that they both regret in the morning. This world's got a whole lot of double standards and definitions that I'm just glad that I don't have to judge.
I wonder whatever happened to Sonya?