I think I am still breathing  

bardicman 50M
7540 posts
5/23/2006 5:16 pm

Last Read:
6/20/2006 3:34 pm

I think I am still breathing

36 hours off, yes that went to hell in a hand basket.

I am in the process of moving to a place where when I have a couple hours off I can also have some peace and serenity.

It has gotten so bad here with me never having privacy I have resorted to staying in a motel room a few days a week where I have no internet connection but at least I have a reliable wake up call. (sometimes when the foreign lady at the front desk can comprehend AM or PM.

And house keeping, Hmmmmm, No one seems to speak english at this fine establishment I call my home away from home.

Sunday morning there is a knock on the door about 10:00am. I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter, it was the maid. I am naked.

I yell through the door, "I don't need housekeeping today!".

She replies, "Housekeeping, YOU NEED!"

I retort, "Thank you but I do not need housekeeping today."

She screams at the door, "YOU NEED HOUSEKEEPING!"

I am flustered, I look over at the bed in exasperation.

Ms. Lover Lady screams at the top of her lungs, "NO!!!!!!!!!"

A meek voice from the other side of the door, "Ok, housekeeping come back later."

I am waiting for an opening at an apartment complex that boasts 2 pools, 3 gyms, 2 basketball courses and a 9 hole golf course. All this can be yours for the low low price of 495 per month. Sounds great except when in the hell will I have time for swimming or working out or playing golf????? This winter when all my jobs but one dry up to nothing. Who in the hell plays golf and swims and play basketball in the dead of winter. I guess I will.

Peace out, I still love you all. I will be settled and more available soon. As long as I keep breathing

I am not dead yet

jadedbabe78 105F

5/23/2006 5:22 pm

$495/month??? Fuck!!!! I'll trade ya....you can have my $1022..lol.

bardicman replies on 5/23/2006 5:50 pm:
yea well, you are the one who said you would never live in Arkansas again. I have discovered that rent is dirt cheap around here compared to other places.

8321 posts
5/23/2006 6:07 pm

Your life is chaotic it seems, Bardic.

My rent is more than yours, though I would not trade Phoenix for living in Arkansas.

I hope you have time to relax and enjoy yourself, bro.

Everyone needs playtime.


"My every move is a calculated step, to bring me closer to embrace an early death." -Tupac Shakur

bardicman replies on 5/24/2006 5:11 pm:
Chaotic yes, enjoyably chaotic... in a way it is because I thrive when I conquer something like the need to sleep

ArtisticTwist75 41F
2505 posts
5/23/2006 6:13 pm

Breath Bardic... Just Breath.


bardicman replies on 5/24/2006 5:11 pm:
Breathe.. breed.. its all good I think.

bulging_boy 49M

5/23/2006 6:57 pm

Are the pools clean then?

bardicman replies on 5/24/2006 5:12 pm:
yes the pools are clean but only because urine is bacteria free...

digdug41 49M

5/23/2006 7:33 pm

well I hope you find yerself a spot bard until then keep surprisin the maid

roaming the cyber streets of blogland

bardicman replies on 5/24/2006 5:13 pm:
I shall diggerman. And I shall swim naked in the pool late at night.....

romeoMEETSjuliet 51M/51F
162 posts
5/23/2006 8:02 pm

She says - Sounds like you're hosting a BBQ soon at the new country club.

I don't know about actually PLAYING golf. But we could put some lawn chairs next to the fairway and make an impression for the neighbors. (Boom box, big score cards, some really tacky clothes, tossing the empties around... and generally looking 'Springeresque'.)

bardicman replies on 5/24/2006 5:15 pm:
Yes, she and he should come join me for a BBQ. No one can smoke ribs like the bard can.

themisskrissy 56F
2302 posts
5/23/2006 8:08 pm

big hugs bard! a kiss or two too......

Virtue Alone Ennobles

bardicman replies on 5/24/2006 5:15 pm:
why thanks for the kisses, and the hugs, and some more kisses and some tongue..

rm_goddess1946 105F
13518 posts
5/23/2006 9:54 pm

taking a deep breath with Bard...

is ok..

moving is so much work...
remember to breathe...
is always a positive thing, you know

Just a little food for thought.............
If you really want to be happy, nobody can stop you...

bardicman replies on 5/24/2006 5:16 pm:
Goddess, between my exwife and my ex GF moving is easy. I have 2 computers, and 3 boxes of clothes

kelly402005 52F

5/23/2006 10:27 pm

~~~ Live it up man!

~~ I lived in Batesville for 2 months, couldn't find a job and it was as hot and humid as hell!!!!

Cost of living was excellent though!!!!

Moved, "Quick, fast and in a hurry!"

~~ I need a job man!

bardicman replies on 5/24/2006 5:17 pm:
Come to Jonesboro Kelly. I can have you working within a week. (a real job)

chasingfun27 38M
1108 posts
5/23/2006 11:08 pm

Who swims in winter?.....Mad fuckers! - You'll fit right in.

bardicman replies on 5/24/2006 5:17 pm:
Chasing, go ahead and grab bulge and you two come join me. we will rule the pool.

frassy_sass 54F

5/24/2006 12:39 am

lol..bitch, bitch, bitch...you would bitch if you were sent to the gallows with a new rope!!!

Seriously, hurry back Bard!


bardicman replies on 5/24/2006 5:18 pm:
Hmmmmm, good point Frassy. I am bitching too much. Tie me down with old rope and teach me to accept and appreciate all I have

GoddessOfTheDawn 105F
11238 posts
5/24/2006 1:07 am

~nodz~ in agreement ....

I'm with her....

bardicman replies on 5/24/2006 5:19 pm:
Since you two are together how about you both come here and we make it a threesome

HBowt2 58F

5/24/2006 1:39 am

doesn't anyone else want to know about Ms Lady Lover.....he writes a whole post and gets away with not being asked once about her....jeeezzzzeeee.....he is clever.....

bardicman replies on 5/24/2006 5:19 pm:

Nothing gets past you though huh Hbow

catseyes23 61F

5/24/2006 1:43 am

Breathe and relax, Bard. Ever tried Yoga? Much better than swimming in the middle of winter...you'll freeze your (fill in word) off!


bardicman replies on 5/24/2006 5:20 pm:
hmmmm, we have been having mild winters so it would only shrink to mere nothingness.

catseyes23 61F

5/24/2006 1:45 am

    Quoting HBowt2:
    doesn't anyone else want to know about Ms Lady Lover.....he writes a whole post and gets away with not being asked once about her....jeeezzzzeeee.....he is clever.....
You have a point there, H. It slipped my mind to ask, but then that may embarrass him!


bardicman replies on 5/24/2006 5:21 pm:
embarress me? naaa, it has my ego popping at the seams.

curious082385 31F
4925 posts
5/24/2006 3:50 am

You're just threatening to stop breathing in the hopes that all us ladies will fight over giving you mouth to mouth.

bardicman replies on 5/24/2006 5:21 pm:
What a wonderful plan Curious.. your idea sweetie, you go first

LadytoPleaseYou 64F
5447 posts
5/24/2006 10:44 am

Well, if you must know...I'm Ms. Lover Lady .

PENIS CHARMING....where are you?

bardicman replies on 5/24/2006 5:22 pm:
woohooo the secret is out

8321 posts
5/24/2006 1:37 pm

So you were the one who traumatized the housekeeper by screaming "NOOOOOOOOOOOOO" at the top of your lungs?

I hope you're nurturing Bardic.

He needs it.


"My every move is a calculated step, to bring me closer to embrace an early death." -Tupac Shakur

bardicman replies on 5/24/2006 5:22 pm:
Damn you Div!!!! I am in a pickle now. She thought you said Nuturing.....

TTigerAtty 62M

5/24/2006 6:04 pm

Bard ... Find you a sexy woman to befriend in your town and move in with her. Why pay $495 per month just to accumulate rent receipts? Put that money away in savings for your old age. Build a life together with her, Bard! Think of your future!

spinmedown 49M
3626 posts
5/24/2006 10:43 pm

That apartment sounds great!

It'd be three times that in Atlanta.

That still leave you $990 / month for motel sex....not a bad deal at all.

Most people are other people... FUCKING CHARACTER LIMIT!!! ~Oscar Wilde

MaggiesWishes 59F

5/25/2006 4:44 am

My, my ... time flies when you are having fun.
I want to kown about the mysterious Ms.Lover, I caught that too quick. OK, maybe not all the details, leave those under the sheets, please.
As long as she makes you happy, I'm OK with it.
Warm huggies to you, sweetie pie

... and yes, it looks like I'm following Spin... don't ya say a word!

rm_art_persists 51M
1789 posts
5/27/2006 7:21 pm

golf away the winter; sounds like an excellent diversion with the right state of mind....

reverend21 49M
1913 posts
5/28/2006 1:23 am

Hmmmmmmmm, could housekeeping have wanted to take care of more than just the room?

Good luck on the apartment hunt, places around here just went to $900 a month

Kaliedascope61 41M
4084 posts
5/28/2006 9:52 am

do you ever get the feeling that its the same little woman that does that housekeeping for every hotel across america?8

imLadyBambi 58M/50F

5/29/2006 2:26 pm


Hope you get moved in your new place soon!

Before you totally loose it all!!LOL

Lady Bambi

curious082385 31F
4925 posts
6/2/2006 5:24 am

Where are you???
I miss you.....

twirly_girl 47F

6/2/2006 9:25 pm

Are we there yet?


duststormdiva 51F
6854 posts
6/4/2006 5:05 pm

"I said I don't need any fucking housekeeping today! Leave me the fuck alone!"

"Yes, you need housekeeping!"

"No, I am busy fucking! Leave me the fuck alone!"

"Housekeeping will come back later."

She plants her ear to the door and listens for the bed to squeak or for that faint or not so faint moan from the lovers inside the room.

The headboard hits the wall as the lovers go at it furiously, and the housekeeper gets wet. Oblivious to her surroundings she sides her hand up her skirt and plays with her clit...


oldman1776 78M
3164 posts
6/8/2006 9:29 pm

Hell son I go away for a while you go gay on me and then back again now your moving. You been busy while I was gone.

Its good to be back.

curious082385 31F
4925 posts
6/10/2006 4:43 am

Ok, so I tried the nice "We miss you, come back" thing.
Didn't work.
Apparently you don't love us or miss us enough.


*sits down to see if it works, glaring and tapping fingers*

NSAAddict 42F

6/11/2006 6:02 pm

I ditto Curious... we miss you bard

TheLilFondler 33F
2576 posts
6/17/2006 4:26 pm

*bounds in and fondles ya while your not looking hehehe

i lost my virginity years ago.....
but i still have the box.....

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