Closer....  

bardicman 50M
7540 posts
1/18/2006 6:37 am

Last Read:
3/9/2006 9:12 am

Closer....


"Oh Joseph", She moaned on the phone. I am missing you and you are so far away....

Being the kind hearted lover that I am, I pulled down my pants and faced to the the west.

"Say something sexy to me baby", I asked her, in my best Barry White voice.

She did.

"There baby", I told her. "Now I am 7 inches closer".



I am not dead yet


pinkplaytoyz 50F

1/18/2006 8:08 am

What a touching endearment...


keithcancook 60M
17841 posts
1/18/2006 8:13 am

I'm sure she was very satisfied with that too, ya big lug. Jeeze.


aascrompn 42M
6444 posts
1/18/2006 8:13 am

LMAO! That's one way to look at things.


rm_DaphneR 58F
7938 posts
1/18/2006 8:24 am

Ahhh...sweet. I know how much Bulge misses you. Just remember, tonight is YOUR night to be "she."

Have tongue, will use it. Repeatedly.


slidein2meplz 62F
1994 posts
1/18/2006 8:26 am

hmmm... 7 inches closer.. Is that all ya got?

~~~ Just me, poppin to say HI! ~~


bardicman 50M

1/18/2006 8:43 am

Pink - did you say you wanted to touch my endowment????

WOOHOOOO



I am not dead yet


bardicman 50M

1/18/2006 8:45 am

Keith.. ROFL.. sorry, I hate it when people double dog dare me to post something.. I always do.. Damn me. ROFL



I am not dead yet


bardicman 50M

1/18/2006 8:53 am

Daph.. I am tired of being she.. I am a testosterone machine.. Well.. Its that how you spell that.. pffffft



I am not dead yet


bardicman 50M

1/18/2006 9:00 am

aascrompn - Well, its the only way I could think of to get closer right now.. It was easier than a spur of the moment road trip.



I am not dead yet


LadytoPleaseYou 64F
5447 posts
1/18/2006 9:10 am

Bardicman, You have the sweetest pillow talk, even on the phone.

If my lover told me that I would rush over and throw myself in his arms...he's only got 5 inches

PENIS CHARMING....where are you?


TheLilFondler 33F  
2576 posts
1/18/2006 9:26 am

lol that is funny

i lost my virginity years ago.....
but i still have the box.....


bardicman 50M

1/18/2006 9:29 am

Damn Slide!! What are you .. A size Queen ????

ROFL



I am not dead yet


bardicman 50M

1/18/2006 9:31 am

Rickslovely - I am a very romantic man.. I forgot to mention I was holding a candle WHILE I was feeling closer to her.



I am not dead yet


rm_SableCicada 40F/36F

1/18/2006 9:32 am

That is quite well above the average, and oh so cute hehehehe

Cecada


Sister_Act_4_You 38F/38F

1/18/2006 10:00 am

Umm...7"??? You told me you had 12"

And that pic you sent me? You know, the one with you wanking off in front of the computer screen with our pics on it? Yep, sure looked at least 12" to me. Are you sending out fake pics again?


bardicman 50M

1/18/2006 10:29 am

Ladytoplease - Let me give you the website for penile extensions so he can have 7 inches too..

[color red}AdultFriendFinder has Deleted this web address



I am not dead yet


bardicman 50M

1/18/2006 10:29 am

Lil - Its not much but you don't have to laugh at it



I am not dead yet


bardicman 50M

1/18/2006 10:30 am

Cicada - Umm .. Yes.. um.. Is it pretty cute huh...



I am not dead yet


bardicman 50M

1/18/2006 10:32 am

Louisa - See.. Its like this.. 8===============>

That was my picture.. I swear .. It was... I just have really small hands and you know how size is relative and all.



I am not dead yet


EyeCandy33333 44F
761 posts
1/18/2006 10:42 am

Just like a man-always having a tape measure handy-"Can't Get Enough Of Your Love Babe"-Barry would be proud of ya!!!

Reach out and touch somebody!!!!!!!!!!!!


pinkplaytoyz 50F

1/18/2006 10:44 am

    Quoting bardicman:
    Pink - did you say you wanted to touch my endowment????

    WOOHOOOO
you have an endowment too?! and here I thought you were a mere struggling poet...


bardicman 50M

1/18/2006 11:24 am

By the way Louisa... How big are your hands?



I am not dead yet


slidein2meplz 62F
1994 posts
1/18/2006 1:22 pm

Don't they say that cameras add more "weight" or in your case...more LENGTH.... er..uh..make ya look bigger than ya really are????

~~~ Just me, poppin to say HI! ~~


TopFisher 63M

1/18/2006 3:04 pm

That's a good one. Really it is!

Careful with that candle, the drapes are too close.


ArealUnicorn 44F

1/18/2006 3:14 pm

Bardic once again you make me smile...oh and by the way my hands are small if that helps...


southrnpeach333 50F

1/18/2006 3:28 pm

Bardicman,

Can you turn a little to the south now?


sexymermaid6956 63F
26393 posts
1/18/2006 3:39 pm

roflmao...mmm 7 inches my good lord...lol your tooooo romantic..good one...

[]

Seduce my mind and my body


rm_AmishAmy 100F
246 posts
1/18/2006 4:06 pm

bardi....i thought you said: "say something sexy in your man voice baby"......mybad
i couldn't hear you right when i was munching on my 24 piece kfc snack bucket o chicken...
call me again.....but make it before 7pm......i have a friend coming over to help me put some KY jelly between my thighs........i'm healing nicely since the friction fire last week......

i don't know why.....i just can't get enough of your love babeeey.......uhuh


007sexy40plus 51F  
7603 posts
1/18/2006 4:11 pm

Well darn I thought you said you wern't going to tell anyone about our phone session. And that seven incher was suppose to be only mine. tsk, tsk, tsk- I just cant get a man to commit. I am walking away with my head held in shame.

I am the real deal! "Come Get Me!!!"


barbiebunny 36F
5597 posts
1/18/2006 4:25 pm

but it still doesnt count as personal growth..Hurrumph!

Its good to be...ME


digdug41 49M

1/18/2006 4:46 pm

ROFL! THATS TELLIN HER BARD

roaming the cyber streets of blogland


impish_pixie 54F
6867 posts
1/18/2006 4:46 pm

YOU have a Barry White voice? OMG....now I'm truly in lust....

I make mistakes, I am out of control & at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best. ~Marilyn


rm_mu_tiger_ 60M
61 posts
1/18/2006 5:01 pm


FeistySyn 52F

1/18/2006 5:06 pm

... just a little farther south... now bend over a tiny bit... mmmmmhmmmm....

Apparently the depth of depravity here is bottomless... don't you feel right at home?
~~~~~


duststormdiva 51F
6854 posts
1/18/2006 5:10 pm

You are so romantic! I wish I was your girl!

DustStormDiva


SolarPowered0 67M
8018 posts
1/18/2006 5:21 pm

7"... 12"... What the hell! It's better than my 4". All I can say is you are nuttier than a pet 'coon, Bud!!!

Solar...

{size 1]BTW: My ass ain't very sexy - but it sure as hell ain't yours! ***LMFAO*** ( I do love ya, Bud... just not in that way! ) Who said we can't be friends - in the end? PC BLOGs or not!!! They can say what they want - you're still the best there is, Bard. This is just one of many posts which proves that, my friend. And so does that 7"


rm_hinkawaza 52M
371 posts
1/18/2006 6:08 pm

Now Bard, does that take angle into account? If it is 7" and angles up or down even slightly you would not be 7" closer to her, technically. And if there is a curve to it that throws a whole other equation into the mix. Man, math is a bummer! LOL


rm_hinkawaza 52M
371 posts
1/18/2006 6:09 pm

Now Bard, does that take angle into account? If it is 7" and angles up or down even slightly you would not be 7" closer to her, technically. And if there is a curve to it that throws a whole other equation into the mix. Man, math is a bummer! LOL


bardicman 50M

1/18/2006 6:57 pm

Eyecandy.. Um.. I have a yardstick....



I am not dead yet


bardicman 50M

1/18/2006 6:58 pm

Pink.. ROFL



I am not dead yet


bardicman 50M

1/18/2006 7:02 pm

Top.. ROFL.. Thanks



I am not dead yet


bardicman 50M

1/18/2006 7:03 pm

Small hands Unicorn... And that picture... hmmm Boston is pretty this time of year



I am not dead yet


rm_1hotwahine 63F
21091 posts
1/18/2006 7:04 pm

I see that you got the comment you wanted on here, lol

Yeah, I'm still [blog 1hotwahine]


bardicman 50M

1/18/2006 7:07 pm

Peaches.. rotating south now...



I am not dead yet


bardicman 50M

1/18/2006 7:12 pm

Amish.. 7pm my time or your time.. I am so confused.. I sound like Barry White... You look like Christopher Cross.. We should really do a duet.... sorry about that fire...



I am not dead yet


oldman1776 78M
3164 posts
1/18/2006 8:04 pm

LMAO Bard I heard it was more like 5".


bardicman 50M

1/18/2006 8:11 pm

Straighten - Sorry babe... no one would have known it was you,. I posted anon target... You might not can get me to commit...

But I bet you could get me committed



I am not dead yet


bardicman 50M

1/18/2006 8:12 pm

Bunz... you keep saying that..



I am not dead yet


bardicman 50M

1/18/2006 8:13 pm

Tiger



I am not dead yet


Sister_Act_4_You 38F/38F

1/18/2006 8:36 pm

    Quoting bardicman:
    By the way Louisa... How big are your hands?
Really REALLY BIG....and hairy too!


boydcounty 67M

1/18/2006 8:55 pm

Didn't you take a step first?

-boydcounty-


AlwaysActive34 83M
110 posts
1/18/2006 10:56 pm

thanks for some insights... after seeing pics of the "not-too-shy" men with all of the gravity defying endowments here on some of the blogs, I figured that my lonely 8 inches had doomed me to insignificance... maybe there's hope for me yet.


DTduzDallas 50F

1/19/2006 2:28 am

lmao Daph and Bunz


bulging_boy 49M

1/19/2006 3:10 am

You could have taken a step and told her you were now two feet closer.

That would have made her sit up!


bardicman 50M

1/19/2006 5:34 am

Boyd.. Yes a took a 6 inch step first.



I am not dead yet


bardicman 50M

1/19/2006 5:35 am

Always.. When I said 7 inches.... I meant from the ground



I am not dead yet


kyplowboy22 61M

1/19/2006 6:24 am

ok, I goota give you this one, now that was good, beau. roflmao. later

kpb


bardicman 50M

1/19/2006 7:53 am

Pixie - That's right baby.. I am gonna love you down tonight. Sweet, smooth, sexy.....



I am not dead yet


bardicman 50M

1/19/2006 7:55 am

Feisty.. Bend over a little bit.. I am not sure I inderst EEEEEEEEEEEE



I am not dead yet


bardicman 50M

1/19/2006 7:57 am

Dusty - Awwwwwww



I am not dead yet


bardicman 50M

1/19/2006 8:04 am

Divinity.. Thats right baby, Here at bardicmans blog.. I always try to respond to all my comments. Sometimes its hard. Especially when AdultFriendFinder sometimes post some in the wrong order or confused order or something. I like your style too DD. I think we should all go pick on Trav some more



I am not dead yet


bardicman 50M

1/19/2006 8:07 am

Solar.. sometimes you worry me,, ROFL ok not really. Check you email.. Got some words for ya bro..



I am not dead yet


bardicman 50M

1/19/2006 8:08 am

Hot1 - Yea baby.. I got your comment saying I got the comment I wanted. likki hi likki ho likki hiney ho



I am not dead yet


bardicman 50M

1/19/2006 8:12 am

Hinky - Dude what ??? We are talking about my feet man. What are you thinking ????



I am not dead yet


bardicman 50M

1/19/2006 8:13 am

Sexy - I think the song you are thinking about is My sweet lord.... I really wanna hold you.... Damn that was a good song.



I am not dead yet


bardicman 50M

1/19/2006 8:15 am

Oldman - quit listening to others dude.. You know how they stretch things.. ROFL



I am not dead yet


bardicman 50M

1/19/2006 8:17 am

Ricks.. hmmm if I sealed it in wax.....



I am not dead yet


bardicman 50M

1/19/2006 8:19 am

DT - How come, for some reason, I can't explain, Your name always makes me think "cleavage". But not just cleavage. wunnerful cleavage.



I am not dead yet


bardicman 50M

1/19/2006 8:20 am

Bulge - Why dont you face east and tell me the same thing biggun



I am not dead yet


bardicman 50M

1/19/2006 8:22 am

KY - Thanks pard. I appreciate that comment from you. Its hard to get one over on the master



I am not dead yet


rm_hardwiremike 54M

1/19/2006 8:38 am

ROFL!!!
inch by inch
your love grows closer
she is the bread
and you are her toaster... LOL!

Good one!


bardicman 50M

1/19/2006 1:58 pm

hardwire.. ROFL.. that was great.. ROFL



I am not dead yet


LIBlonde97 40F
1028 posts
1/19/2006 4:08 pm

I had my wry response instantly figured out.

Don't you mean you were 2 feet closer?

(Just leave out that part about that big step you also took)


Too bad Bulge got to it first.

Bastid... stop reading my mind!!!!!! LOL

XOXO

A


bardicman 50M

1/19/2006 11:03 pm

BASTID,, he wants me to quit pointing at him Liblonde



I am not dead yet


DTduzDallas 50F

1/20/2006 4:07 am

Not sure, but ty.


AlwaysActive34 83M
110 posts
1/23/2006 8:21 pm

Bard... Nothing gets my respect as much as for your humility... pardon my not recognizing the effort you have made to develop the muscles to keep it 7 inches above the ground -- hope that it's not straining your back muscles. All of the women here have helped me (mentally) to strengthen my own resolve -- a long time ago, I was told that the harder things are, the more we are strengthened.


0_may_I 52F

1/24/2006 3:04 am

LMAO...and LOL and LMAO..I liked that one.
0_Ma_I /


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