Lowest of the Lows  

avgjoe19602 56M
189 posts
5/21/2005 9:46 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Lowest of the Lows

I am finding that there are a lot of people on this site, both Male and Female, that have come to AdultFriendFinder because there is a mismatch in sex drive with their partner or spouse. Of course, many of you know that is why I am here. Why do some people not have much desire?

Here are some excerpts from an article someone sent to me.

Low sexual desire "is prevalent and distressing to many," reports lead researcher S.R. Leiblum, MD, with the Robert Wood Johnson Medical School in Piscataway, N.J.


Leiblum found:
• One in four premenopausal women and one in three menopausal women have low sexual desire.
• The women participated in sexual activity less often, initiating sexual activity, having intercourse, and experiencing orgasm and sexual pleasure far less frequently than other women.
• They felt less sexually desirable and less satisfied with their sex life; that translated into a less-than-satisfactory relationship.
• Younger women who were menopausal because their ovaries had been surgically removed were significantly more distressed about their low sexual desire.

Their relationships are very different from women with normal sexual desire and deserve more attention from doctors, Leiblum says.

Among the options to fight this low sex drive dilemma is testosterone replacement therapy. Yes, the male hormone testosterone in also present in women although to a much lesser degree. They conclude that testosterone replacement may help some women to achieve a higher level of desire but that in some women it has no affect. The article also mentions that some people, men and women, just get out of the habit of having sex.

Do you think your partners problems are hormonal imbalances, out of the habit, or just never liked it much? Have they sought medical assistance for the problem? Also, how distressing is the low sex drive for them? Are they content with the way things are or do they really want to get their groove on again? How does their attitude about solving the problem affect you? Lets hear from the women that have male partners with low sex drive too. I am interested to see if there are any similarities in attitudes about solving the problem and how it affects your relationship.

I will save my personal comments as responses to your comments! I know there are a lot of these folks out there. Please leave your comments, I am truly interested in hearing your thoughts on this issue.


LivnLifeFully 53F
12 posts
5/24/2005 4:41 am

sexyfitwoman I could not agree with you more.... it there is a problem with someone, doctors are too quick to write a perscription to cure the problem.... many doctors (general MD's) have NO clue about the side effects of the Selective Seritonin Reuptake Inhibitors such as Prozac, Paxil and Zoloft. Many general practitioner dont have the time to spend with their patients and truely look at the issue of sex in a marriage. Depression can lead to low sex drive, and it is ironic that they are quick to perscripe a medication that will completely knock it out!!! Go figure. My recommendation for women with depression and or low sex drive is to go to a psychiatrist and be upfront and HONEST that the depression is causing problems in the marriage due to low sex drive. YOU wont get a SSRI..... and if one is perscribed then ask the psychiatrist to include the husband in the sessions. Communication is KEY to any relationship. Don't leave the husband in the dark.... they will NOT tolerate a sexless marriage... they will have an affair such as case of cumtounge44. I really dont blame him at all... the sex drive is a very driven force and will get met..... and please do not say the hand will do the trip.... it is more about human touch and feel!!!! Avejoe19602 thanks for this important post, and sexyfitwoman your comments are KEY to this whole medication thing.... Bless you all - I am so greatful to have a very high sex drive right now and pray everyday that I get to keep it a long time.....not bad at 42.

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