Pondering the relationship that weren  

amb_lily 40F
371 posts
11/20/2005 9:24 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Pondering the relationship that weren

Have you ever met someone that was still totally in love with their ex? It was plain as can be?

What do you say when they ask for advice? It seems nothing was wrong with the relationship….I mean as far as fighting etc. but the other person “needed time”? How can one person think a relationship is so right and the other not feel the same way?

Do you suppose it verges on stalkerish if that person try’s to pursue the other? At what point does being in love with someone become obsessive?

Do you suppose it just will take time for them to get over the lost love? Do you think there is any validity to the saying “finding another lover is the only way to get over heartache”? Do you think it’s wrong that they are dating if still pining after another?

I think it’s all debatable, but pondering how is it that something so right for one person can be so wrong for the other….I think about my divorce and it was all wrong on both sides, I mean I was sad that it ended, but …it was very refreshing to be out of the relationship.

When you can feel someone else’s heart breaking for another it’s an odd sort of feeling…

im_curious_4u 50M

11/20/2005 11:03 am

Been there done that. Recently actually. I was really into her but she decided I wasn't the one. We were friends for a long time and it got more intimate after her divorce, which did not involve me, but that's another story. Anyway to make a long story short it took me a while to get over her. I had to remove myself from the situation and not see her. When we would get together I could feel myself wanting more than a friendship but knowing that she didn't. We still email each other but we haven't seen one another for a while. It just takes time. I don't think juping into a serious relationship is a good idea but finding someone new to go out with and date is a good thing.

1023 posts
11/20/2005 1:31 pm

I think the Bee Gees said it best...
"Tell me, how do you mend a broken heart?
How do you stop the rain?
How do you try
to hold back what's inside
and ever try to love again?" or something like that (and you thought I was all about gangsta ).

Funny, our timing... hope someone else brought this out of you. I believe that to fill a void, one needs something of the same material (does that make sense?) I've got FWB's but they're only limited to the time we spend, it's not what I want, but a lover in the hand is better than two on the web, according to Benjamin Franklin. I know that what I've written both here and there might make you uncomfortable, but I feel that honesty is important and try to be very obvious when I'm not. You're attention and happiness is very important to me and I'm sorry that distnce makes us incompatible for you would be my choosing to cure any pains that I might have.

Oh, you're just not into me? It's cool, I can respect that. I'm still here for you.
Oh my gods, I'm sooo embarrassed

rm_Ptalk1155 34M
3450 posts
11/20/2005 9:21 pm

Humans are creatures of habit. We don't like change, especially when it comes to love, that's why so many people stay in so many bad relationships. The fear of the unknown and of being alone is worse than having put up with that which we dislike.

I know the feeling of still wanting to be with an ex. Mine and I are on good terms, but being in the same room evokes certain feelings of longing from time to time.

But, c'est la vie.

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