Our first party "out"  

adventuresome72 44M/48F
25 posts
8/13/2006 10:32 pm

Last Read:
9/3/2006 5:01 pm

Our first party "out"

Well, we went to a meet/greet party out in Chiba last night (big thx to BGDDYCOOL and asianlady4love for their effort to organize!).

And in almost all respects it was a great success for us. We were both very nervious to go becaues we did not know what to expect, but when we got there we met lots of very kind, interesting, and relaxed people! We had a few drinks and were able to relax ourselves and enjoy some dancing. The talking with people was a bit tough because the DJ/music was quite disruptive (sometimes we got real names, sometimes AdultFriendFinder handles, so that was confusing too! LOL!). But still, it was our first time out, and I considered it a huge success that we could both enjoy ourselves without feeling worried and the wife didn't have any uncomfortableness or any "drama".

We did learn something... seems that when the wife meets with a couple and the man is Japanese then she finds herself becoming more polite and embarrased (goes into Japanese-mode, as I like to call it) -- that seems to be a barrier for comfort and moving forward... might be that we need to focus on mixed couples, or single women that don't make her assume her Japanese-mode.

Well, lots to talk about with the wife, just very glad that we made this small step forward together and had fun together!

syaraku 51M/45F

8/16/2006 4:07 am

Do you remember us?
We also attended the party in Chiba on 13th August and we talked with you at that time.
Our impression of the party was place of encounter for single guys and single ladies.
Because there were very few couples in this party.
We think married couple had better enjoy with genuine couples who love each other.
Basicly the purpose of swinger's life is different from SEX friend couples or single male and single female.
Life in Swingers sometimes have danger.
We think so from our bad experience.
Now you are standing on turning point.
If you misselect,you might have bad experience.
Anyway we wish you advance slowly and carefully.

adventuresome72 44M/48F
15 posts
8/20/2006 10:02 pm

As always Syaraku-san your advice and thoughts are VERY welcome here! Of course we remember you, in the past you have invited us to a party but at that time we were not really very ready. I'm not sure if we are ready yet, but I think we are making comfortable progress (both of us are happy/positive).

The party did have a definate "singles" feel to it, but we were just enjoying being together outside of of a "normal" party -- it was good warm-up for us because my wife is normally so shy.

Certainly safety and comfort for my wife is my _first_ concern, this is why we take it so slowly. I am sure that at some point there may be some "bad" or "uncomfortable" experiences... life is like that... we will deal with them as best we can when they heppen.

Thank you again for your advice and message.

2cookies4u 57M/53F

8/22/2006 4:59 am

By all means, take it slow. You've both got to be comfortable not only around others, but with yourselves, when you're "with" others. We both found that it tugged at our hearts slightly, but we both knew we are deeply in love and that nothing will break those bonds.
Best wishes to you both. Let us know if we can assist you in any way.

adventuresome72 44M/48F
15 posts
9/3/2006 5:01 pm

Hi there 2cookies, thanks for stopping by and making an entry.

>at our hearts slightly, but we both knew we are deeply in love and that nothing will break those bonds.

Ya, I think my wife has a much harder time of disassociating the physical action from the emotional content -- but I'm hoping that if I'm there supporting her, then she can have the emotional content and physical fun at the same time. Slow and steady "wins" the race.

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