Going about setting up a mfm  

ac_sting 52M/52F
42 posts
9/25/2005 11:41 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Going about setting up a mfm

I would like to know from couples and guys how to set up a mfm hookup. I would like to know how a couple goes about picking the guy they want to share with, do they just let the gal pick the guy from just the pic's or what? Do you find someone in the same town or someone further away? How about the marital status of the person your looking for, is it better if he is married or single. Also, what are some of the arrangements that some of you have used as far as who does what sexually, and do they respect it when it comes to the time together. Lastly, has there been any problem that you came accross with males that you have been with who won't stop trying to contact you or your mate? I am hoping some couples wouldn't mind sharing some advice, we would appreaciate any and all, ac.

Philosophy_N_Sex 49M/47F

9/25/2005 12:47 pm

Having done what you seek, the MFM, maybe we can help out with some of our experiences.

The "other guy" must know he is a guest, and that everyone will be respeced. It is all about you the couple, not all about him.

We do not interact with guys who replie with "tell me more" and give you no information about their hopes, ideas, likes and dislikes. If he can't talk to you online, he can't be trusted in private.

We do not tolerate guys who do not talk to the husband as well. It is not gay to talk about the scene with another guy, who else would know the ladies likes and dislikes better than the husband.

Any "end runs" around the husband to see her alone, should cut off contact with the guy. You seek MFM, not a pice of ass for him.

Do not tolerate guys who are pushy and want to "do it TONIGHT" you have plenty of time and options, pick what you feel is the best of the bunch.
DO meet once or twice in person, and again see how respectful and patient he is. IF he tries to be all over her uninvited, or does not look to the husband for consent, then look else where. Any guy unwilling to meet in person for a preliminary meeting move on. It is not a "waste of time" if he thinks any of you pre screening is a waste of time, move on it is not all about him, it is all about you two! You do this for your marriage and sex life, not for him to think he is a stud.
Of course expect the pictures of the guy to be very flattering, and maybe 10 or more years old. That is another reason to see the person before.
And if he in NOT willing to give up his real name, dump him. You have mroe reason to be discreet than he does. Also with hsi real name check the sex offender registry.

As far as he being married or not that is up to you both.
maried guys will typically be mroe discreet, cleaner, and has a basic understanding of married life. downsides are less times to meet, and if discovered an angery spouse can be hell
A single guy is available nearly all the time, no worries about being discovered. But a playboy would be more desparate, less worried about being disease free.

SO if any guy does not take the time to make you feel at ease dump him. there are 10 to 15 guys per couple on here so be as chosey as you want.

hope this helps

ac_sting 52M/52F

9/26/2005 9:13 am

Thank you so very much Philosophy_N_Sex, that is some great advice. There are some things that you mentioned I didn't even think about asking. We're definitely going to be specific with the guys were thinking about meeting, thanks again.

Elgin_m_4_3sum 62M

10/5/2005 9:19 am

Advice I follow as a solo male in mfms. My only bad experience from the solo males half was getting invited to a home where it turned out the husband was all enthusiastic but she was far from it. I walked into a dimly lit living room, pornos playing on the TV, candles, wine, and she had locked herself in the bedroom.

Weird thing was I had actually talked to her on the phone beforehand. I insist on that just to make sure both agree, and she seemed fine with it. But she sure changed her mind before I got there.

Anyways, best to discuss expectations throughly including things like male male contact (hard to avoid) kissing, cum, and ...well...let your imagination work here.

They can be great experiences though and I've become good friends with both partners.


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