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100 Reasons to Love or Hate Me
100 Reasons to Love or Hate Me
The lovely frogger (when will I get to see her eyes?) posted a list of 100 random things about her, and I found myself taking a compatability test, seeing where I agreed, modified, or just simply had a joke to go along. So for the fun of it, and to try to spark some conversation, I submit for your pleasure or vomit inducing:
100 Reasons to Love or Hate Me
1. I can play any sport, but not that well.
2. You will never hear me say an unkind word about any Philadelphia sports franchise.
3. Kevin Smith is the greatest genius of modern cinema.
4. If you think cartoons are just for kids, you're an idiot.
5. I have a mortal fear of frogs.
6. If I could choose the method of my death, it would be a heart attack at the moment of orgasm, so I can cum and go at the same time.
7. When I die, I will be chryogenically frozen. That way, I can be brought back to life. Then, I will fuck with people. (e.g. going to a Klan rally and saying I met Jesus and he's black)
8. The greatest actor of this or any generation is Jimmy Stewart.
9. My only true sexual desire is to please the woman I'm having sex with. I have my fantasies, but if she doesn't climax, the experience is wasted.
10. I believe in abortion rights. If destroying a potential life is murder, then my right hand is guilty of 3.7 trillion murders.
11. I love to cook, and am good at it.
12. I have no Italian blood in me, but all my cooking specialties are Italian foods.
13. Though I am only 1/16 Irish, it is the largest portion of blood in me, and I claim Irish heritage.
14. I am an Irish Protestant, though I haven't been to church for anything besides weddings and funerals since I was 12.
15. I vote for candidates, not for a party. Sadly, since I've been old enough to vote, every Republican on the ticket has been a total asshole.
16. Jesus did not die for my sins. He died for the sins of mankind at the time. He was dead for 2000 years before I could commit a sin.
17. "If we're all God's children, what's so special about Jesus?" -Jimmy Carr
18. Political Correctness is Logical Incorrectness.
19. I share a birthday (August 18th) with Patrick Swayze, Denis Leary, and the Amendment giving women the vote.
20. There is no occasion where I won't listen to Billy Joel.
21. I was more sad at Bob Denver's death than John Denver.
22. I am descended from fucking Irishmen and fucking sailors, so I will curse all the fuck I want.
23. The only difference between dating and prostitution is that with prostitution, you actually get the sex you paid for.
24. I will eat meat and potatoes till the day I die, at age 38.
25. I used to be the host of a radio show.
26. One day, I plan on winning the Oscar for Original Screenplay.
27. I waste condoms by masturbating in them.
28. Every situation in the world can be summed up with, "What the fuck?"
29. I was a special student before "special" meant "retarded."
30. I smoke weed, but not cigarettes.
31. I have made out with a lesbian.
32. I garnered the nickname "Fingers" in high school, for two reasons. One, I flipped off some yearbook pictures. Two, it was used by my first girlfriend because of my skill with my hands.
33. Every problem can be resolved over ice cream.
34. "The wrong two Beatles died first." -George Carlin
35. I had an ingrown toenail for five years.
36. I was the first in my family to graduate with a four-year degree.
37. I watch Survivor as a guilty pleasure, and have applied to be on it.
38. The worst TV show ever created was Friends.
39. Stupid people should not be allowed to breed.
40. I believe myself superior to no one.
41. I got in my first car accident yesterday (backed into a pole, bent my trailer buffers, and broke the cover of my tail light, which I taped back together.)
42. My only regret in college was that I didn't get laid.
43. I have written two screenplays, and have two more in the works.
44. I can quote Family Guy on command, with voices.
45. The Simpsons is the greatest show ever created.
46. Unless the situation calls for otherwise, I will wear jeans and a t-shirt every day.
47. I am a proud member of the Sons of the American Legion.
48. I was born in Newark, DE and I live in Newark, NY. I have never been to Newark, NJ.
49. If you can't laugh at something, then you are lost.
50. I do not fear death. I fear the possibility that there is no afterlife.
51. Unless they were physically or sexually abused, any man who can not proudly call himself a "Momma's Boy," is not a good man.
52. I am honest to a fault.
53. Every person is responsible for their own indignation.
54. I graduated with a Bachelor of Science degree in Television, Radio, and Film, focusing on Screenwriting, with minors in English and Political Science. If that were to hold, the only job I could do is writing for West Wing.
55. I was in the last graduating class of Syracuse OrangeMEN. The logo was shortened to gender neutral status the next term.
56. My college graduation speaker was Phylicia Rashad. The previous three speakers were President Clinton, Rudy Giuliani, and Astronaut Eileen Collins, an alum. Did my class get shafted or what?
57. I have had tequila once. I will never drink it again.
58. The most beautiful part of a woman's body is her eyes. After that, round objects a little further south.
59. I am a nerd and proud of it.
60. My favorite movie is Full Metal Jacket, followed by It's a Wonderful Life.
61. I can master any video game in 3 hours.
62. I am a night owl, yet I never have anything to do at night.
63. To this day, I do not understand the concept of mascara and capri pants.
64. I do not support war. But I do whatever I can to support the soldiers.
65. My greatest sexual fantasy is anything involving water. Guess that's from my Naval upbringing.
66. I remember when Disney made good movies.
67. If I ever meet Britney Spears, I will kick her ass.
68. I will watch Star Trek reruns for hours on end if there's nothing better to do.
69. I have never had the simple joy of playing strip poker.
70. To this day, I would bang Hillary Clinton.
71. If you can't convince 'em, confuse 'em.
72. I want to skydive once before I die.
73. I want to skydive after I die.
74. "When angry, count four. When very angry, swear." -Mark Twain
75. I have no shame in admitting I'm an avid Harry Potter fan.
76. I do not believe in cheating. Swinging is one thing, but I will never be unfaithful to the woman I'm with.
77. I require four drinks before I will do karaoke, then I will tear the place up. I'll mumble and slur in drunken mode, then pull off Marving Gaye with perfect gusto.
78. If it can be classified as rock music, I will listen to it without complaint, even if I don't like the song.
79. music does not harm children or society. If artists are responsible for the effects their lyrics inspire, then Al Green owes me child support.
80. The world will end when we find a Starbucks inside a Wal-Mart.
81. I don't get NASCAR, but I'll still watch it.
82. God's greatest gift to mankind was ESPN.
83. I am not afraid to cry, but it takes a great deal to make it happen.
84. The creepiest thing I have ever seen were the glasses John Lennon wore when he was shot.
85. I have watched a porno for the story.
86. I cannot do an impersonation of the president because I can't get my head that far up my own ass.
87. I hate commercials.
88. I love to watch football, American and Rest-of-the-world.
89. I do not see the appeal of Jessica Simpson. Never have, never will.
90. One day, I'd like to dress up to see Rocky Horror Picture Show.
91. I like Shakespeare just because he had so many ways of saying "sex." Why aren't we as creative?
92. I live in a town where Sex Ed is taught only by state mandate, and you get an 'A' for saying "abortion is evil."
93. I have shaved my head twice. I also have an afro wig (see picture).
94. The only word I know in Spanish is "bandejo."
95. I respect anybody who has the guts to tell me to fuck off.
96. All I ever ask in life is to have my fair shot. Let me have my chance, that way if I succeed or fail, I have no one to blame or thank but myself.
97. Teachers are the most underappreciated people in America.
98. I have biked 15 miles per day to commute to work.
99. I love to act/roleplay, just so I can be someone other than me for a little while.
100. It took me an hour and fifteen minutes to think up 100 things about me.
Have fun, and remember to blink.
9/9/2005 8:20 pm
wild - an hour & 15 min? waaaay less than mine took. Yer good!|
9/14/2005 4:07 pm
you gave me inspiration but i dont think i know myself that well. oh and mine would probably be all about sex.|
9/15/2005 9:32 pm
kurious, you say your's would be all about sex, as if that's a bad thing.|