A rose by any other name..  

WildChild5884 32F
40 posts
2/10/2006 1:01 pm

Last Read:
5/1/2006 7:34 pm

A rose by any other name..

I got to thinking the other day about our need to label things, and of course leading to the sexual area our genitals are called by many varied names..Guys get the distinct pleasure of having a:
Penis
Dick
Wang
Schlong
As opposed to the:Schledium & schlort
Johnson
Dong
Prick
Willy
Piece
Knob
Kickstand
Gherkin
Fuckstick
Weenie
Weiner
Ding-a-ling
Outtie
Sausage
Meat
Beef
And last but not least
Lingam


Okay some lose their appeal with age..some come back into favor once the little ones know how to spell, and ya have to get a bit creative in how to talk without little ears catching the drift.

I remember one time coming home from school years ago I was setting in the back of the bus listening to the older boys talking..Of course one very ornery senior somehow got around to the topic of naming his "member" which then spread to the boy in front of me..So it was concluded L's member was now deemed Rumpelstiltskin and D's was Pinocchio..Yeah I know the dream client of the therapist..anyway it occurred to me especially as I got older a lot of men treat their penis as a separate entity almost talking about "him" not it..

I however never felt the need to name the girls or pick out titles for my twins The closest my southern region ever got to a nameplate was when one guy insisted on calling it my girly..Which was a bit creepy for me, and went about the process to make him as quiet as possible about naming my pieces and part.. Women in general seem to get the short end of the stick on the whole pick a name, any name process..We wind up with some pretty crude descriptive terms which will not be included in this list, but some I've seen are:

Pussy
P'tang
Poontang
Virginia
Vagina
Cunt
Pussy
Twat
Snatch
Beaver
Muff
Bearded Clam
Cooch
Cooter
Innie
Honey Pot
Box
Cockpit
Slit
And of course Yoni


I'm reminded of this little tidbit a male friend sent me awhile back..

The vagina is a buggy, often catastrophically so, feature of the Female Edition of the Human Being version 1.0. After approximately 13 to 16 years of proper operation, the vagina becomes problematic and starts failing periodically (no pun intended) around once a month. This in turn leads to the corruption (often permanent) of the mental faculties of the host. Whenever this happens, the individual in question is commonly referred to as "a bitch."

It is widely expected by pundits and pollsters alike that the vagina will be either entirely removed or fixed by the next release of Homo Sapiens Sapiens. When asked about any current patches to resolve this issue in existing organisms, Evolution clearly stated that it has "no resources available at the moment." In addition, it was widely made known by Nature that the vagina was a design decision "not fully thought-out." As a result, humanity has suffered the devastating consequences, on a roughly monthly basis.

Jennifer is really furious today, and is acting completely incoherently; it must be her vagina again.


Now I can't completely disagree with the rough patches a few days out of a month, and can find the humor in this..However today wouldn't be such a bad day to show a little respect for the Yoni..After all that is where we come from..

As for the other still no ideas on naming my own parts..I do have one guilty pleasure though..I tend to create names for guys I know, and if you're still reading you must be bored so for a change in mood I'll share a couple..

The Incredible Devirginator
The Crush
The True Gentleman Caller
The Cherry
The Jackhammer


Looking at them now it sounds like the characters of a twisted comic book series..Well I think that's enough trouble for now.. (waving white flag) All in good fun right?


Gozzbot 29M
132 posts
2/10/2006 1:58 pm

I love the last bit, your twisted comic book crew as you refer to them.

Your right in saying that women tend to get the rough dealing in naming body parts but thats generally because the English language is mostly created by men. Don't get me wrong, women can come up with some creative names to but unfortunately there not heard of as often.

Shame really....


WildChild5884 32F

2/10/2006 8:59 pm

Thank you, Yeah I realized that last bit after I looked it over..Does sound a bit like a R rated new comic series.. All it's missing is the ever so important tight clothing, and perhaps the cape Got the names down. That is a good point..I can't say that I've heard as many in a good context for women. Guess it's pretty common though.


rm_VoodooGuru1 49M
2053 posts
2/16/2006 4:57 am

"it occurred to me especially as I got older a lot of men treat their penis as a separate entity almost talking about "him" not it.. "

YES! I feel the same way, and have said so on this esteemed site many times, as well as in private. There was even a playmate once who would not believe me when I said I had never given a name to my penis.

It would never occur to me to give it a name. It's an appendage that brings me (and others) a lot of pleasure. But so does my tongue, and guys would never name their tongue, would they?


rm_tastee1966 50M
5 posts
2/17/2006 9:51 am

So, just out of curiosity, which one am I?


WildChild5884 32F

2/17/2006 9:43 pm

Voodoo that is kind of surprising, but I think you're perhaps more mature and grounded then your counterparts..Seems like half of the guys grow out of it though..The other half just grow

You bring up a good point..I haven't heard of any named tongues. That one slipped by apparently.


WildChild5884 32F

2/17/2006 9:52 pm

Tastee you are absolutely The True Gentleman Caller. A great example of how it should be done.


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