|Blogs > WhyteRavenne > Letters to a Master|
Slow Down, Baby
Slow Down, Baby
I've been experimenting more. I however, feel that it has completely taken over. I want to reign my lust in, however, my Honey seems to be pushing for it to go further. I am not entirely sure how I feel about it. I know what it is I want, in the long run, and at the pace I am going, I know it will never happen. I am burning through too many friendships. I want friends, ones that will be around for a very long time. I know, I know, every friendship, every one nighter is still a relationship, but, it's not enough for me.
Well, chitting with Honey has helped. He promises not to push, since when he does, I tend to fold like a cheap umbrella. In matters of sex, at least. Everywhere else in my life I am strong... but, I guess, for me, it's a compromise. Ah, my Cancerian nature. He did point out that, even though, I did burn through quite a few possible friendships, I probably didn't do that much damage. They may not have been friends, anyway.
I will admit, though, there is a real sweet kid on AdultFriendFinder that has caught my attention. He's got a lot of the same physical interests as me, based upon fashion, and personal ideals. He's very young (to me), though, so, provides an interesting contrast to my experience. I would really enjoy having him as a friend. Not necessarily as a benefits, one, although, that in itself provides a kinky flutter to my belly.
As to my new fetish... I am still euphoric over it. I find myself smiling at the oddest times. I think most of it, though, was the fact that it was with two people who cared for me. It wasn't just lust that carried me. However, lust is definitely a driving factor, now.