Ode to men ( or lesbians) on Valentine  

Vevixen 51F
80 posts
2/12/2006 7:45 pm

Last Read:
3/9/2006 6:44 pm

Ode to men ( or lesbians) on Valentine

Men are like prunes. You suck them in the morning and they give you shit all day.

Men are like coffee. Some are rich and warm and can keep you up all night.

Men are like concrete. Once spread out…they can take a while to harden

Men are like magic lanterns. They look shiny but one needs to rub them well to get their genie out…

Men are like …pop-corn.
It is hard to resist it, but one gets quickly tired of them, even nauseated…

Men are like horoscopes. They always tell you what to do, and most of the time, they are wrong.

Men are like mascara.
They disappear on the first sign of emotion.

Men are like snow storms In New York…
You never know when they’ll come. How many inches you’ll have to deal with, and how long they’ll last !

Men are like parking spaces. The best are already taken and the others are to small or handicapped…

How do you call a man that is sensitive, intelligent and handsome? …an homosexual.

Men are the living proof that reincarnation exists….
One cannot get THAT dumb within one lifestyle…

What did the first man on the moon signify ? A good start !

Researchers have discovered why Moses was lost for over 40 years in the desert with the Isreaelites…A real man never asks for directions .

The three biggest crises in the life of a man ? The loss of his wife, the loss of his job and a scratch on his car.

What is the commonality between clouds and men ? When they go…one can hope for a sunny day.

What is the commonality between a man and a swing set ? At first it is fun then you get sick in your stomach.

Why do men sit with their legs wide open ? If they did not they would smash their brain.

Why does a man tilt his head when thinking ? So his two neurones can meet.

How do you make a man crazy in bed ? You hide the remote control.

Note of the author :
I still love them, need them, could not live without them and will not claim ownership of the above…I just translated it from another language…so do not castigate me !

roughandread1 54F

2/12/2006 10:41 pm

Oh so funny and oh so true

salomed 56M
7 posts
2/14/2006 5:49 am

thanks for the insight,do i sense a rebirth in you?

Vevixen 51F
81 posts
2/14/2006 1:18 pm

Meaning a deviating one? lol Not at all...I am bi and proud to be , unless you are speaking at a metaphysical level...and there might be some truth to that comment. So what kind of "sensing devices" do you have?

Vevixen 51F
81 posts
2/14/2006 1:19 pm

La langue de l'amour!

rm_PurryKitty2 48M/50F
9753 posts
2/19/2006 7:06 am

These are great!!!

Purry {=}


redmustang91 57M  
8662 posts
2/19/2006 9:53 am

I thought a few metrosexuals exist, like a sensitive smart homo, only straight. As for not asking for directions, I have found often those you ask are wrong. Better to use a computer, navigation device or map. Scratching or damaging the car is normal these days. That is what insurance and repair shops are for. Stereotypes are for lazy thinkers, and that certainly does not describe the fair damsel Vevixen!

Vevixen 51F
81 posts
2/19/2006 6:03 pm

Redmustang...I have received so much hatemail regarding this post. My only intent was humor. I did put a disclaimer....but people seem to take things literally. I have hesitated how to "correct" this faux pas. I could either try and find a "ode to women" showing my non partial views, as one kind AdultFriendFinder friend suggested...or I could write one on my own...I think I will produce one with sexual inuendos...that'll make it more fun, and might increase my readership!Ha! Of course these were clich├ęs, of course they were slenderous, of course they were unjustified and many untrue....but they were FUNNY!Thanks for taking things with a grain of salt. Thanks for your discernment and assiduous comments. Kiss

mygmyg 59M

2/23/2006 7:38 pm

Ms. V, don't let the hatemail bother you. If one cannot laugh and see the bits of truth about US men, then they must be on another planet, not Uranus, but Theiranus. And Their In lies Their problem....

their MeatHead needs to be carefully pulled out, and the condum removed for a clear view of something that IS funny, and true in some instances. If we cannot laugh at our shortcomings and the views that others have of us, for whatever reason, we, men, are going to be sitting, ALONE, for quite sometime.

So, scooch over a bit and lets laugh and enjoy one another!

Vevixen 51F
81 posts
2/26/2006 4:58 pm

mygmyg: Thank you for your eloquent commentary and your support!

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