Who is Nikki and Does She Have a Love Life?  

Toothy_Cunt 41F
58 posts
11/20/2005 10:48 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Who is Nikki and Does She Have a Love Life?


Hrmmm... I have a psuedo-love life. I've been dating (if that's what it can be called) a man for just about two years.

He is unavailable most of the time for various reasons. We see each other only occasionally and even then rather briefly. It isn't the most ideal relationship but it works for me for now.

Sadly, I love him - rather, not sadly - I'm not sad about it but it is sad as it applies to the relationship I guess. He's set a standard for how I should feel in someone elses (a lover, a friend, a boyfriend blah blah) presence.

If you've ever read (or saw for you non-readers) Stephen King's HEARTS IN ATLANTIS, Ted says, "It will be the kiss by which all others in your life will be judged...and found wanting."

I believe that this is what this man represents in my life. Perhaps he's meant to be my one-that-got-away, perhaps we'll work it out and be very happy. For today, I'm just glad to know him.

I don't otherwise date really. I might meet a group out for drinks, I flirt, I talk but dating? Not really. I don't think it would be fair to bring someone into my situation because there's always the chance that "he" would not have reasons anymore and I would be gone in a flash no matter how well I was getting along with someone else.

Definitely not fair - I'm always up front and honest about that when it comes to someone's interest in me.

cuddlykittenn 42F

11/20/2005 11:34 pm

some times it is the one who got away who helps raise us to a higher standard that we would have not found all by our selves.
someone said it, i can't remember who, but anyhow it was a great quote and it applies here.


rm_luke69iner 48M
3275 posts
11/23/2005 3:08 am

Wow dating sucks some times don't it

Best wishes for you

I hope Santa smacks him upside the head with a lump of coal and knocks some sense into his head for you and if that don't work Santa might have to get you with the coal next year if you are still following this guy around.


S'io credesse che mia risposta fosse
A persona che mai tornasse al mondo,
Questa fiamma staria senza piu scosse.
Ma perciocche giammai di questo fondo
Non torno vivo alcun, s'i'odo il vero,
Senza tema d'infamia ti rispondo
.
~Dante~


SatisfyUnmeNow 50M
1 post
11/24/2005 5:28 am

That is why I don't date married or "attached" women. The danger in that situation is you fall in love with an unavailable person. Then you are waiting for someone who "can't" be with you. Not trying to be mean, but I've been there, done that. It's pure agony, you convince yourself their reason's are justified, and things would be so wonderful "If" they were free. The real truth is no matter what there situation, if they truly felt the same way they would run...not walk to be with you. I'm sure you'll rip me to pieces with "no it's not like that" or you have it all wrong. You are probably way smarter then I am, after all I'm just a single guy looking for women on a sex site lol. My sarcasm comes from that very same relationship I described....maybe, just maybe yours does too. Bracing for the onslaught of inevitable bashing. OK I can take it, tell me how I am wrong and how I should keep my opinions to myself. Oh, wait this is a blog, I can say what I think lol. Truly I don't know you, but I do hope that things work out. (SatisfyUnmeNow)


Toothy_Cunt 41F

11/24/2005 9:08 pm

Satisfy -

I have no need to bash others for their personal opinions. I do quite honestly get that he may never be available, when my patience runs out then I will move on. Until I've had enough I won't be able to anyhow - might as well embrace the experience for what it is and learn from it in the meantime.

Yes, it gets me down some days, some days I tell him I've had enough. We part for a couple of weeks and find our way back to each other. For now, the only one I'm hurting is me.

~Nikki


rm_FcPorto766 37M
3 posts
11/27/2005 7:02 am

wow..sad , indeed, that sux. It has to hurt alot that u cant have him...i have been there too. My advice..dont wait for him , cuz if he is not interested then u wont never be.


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